Decluttering thread 7 - as the days lengthen we’ll feel more motivated to declutter

[stealthninjamum]

Sorry for the long thread title, I’ve just seen that the old thread has reached 1,000 posts.

For newbies this thread and the old one a day threads are for a group of mumsnetters who are decluttering. We’ll share tips and advice and inevitably the conversation moves on to organisation tips, pretty storage solutions and persuading our families to join in.

We’re all at different stages of decluttering so join us for support and chat.

Right, I have finally got my life on gear a bit more. I sent my 3 vinted parcels, one which got sent at the 11th hour. Oops. I usually send my stuff really quickly.

I also listed a nice art print which I never hung up on Freecycle, and I was glad it was collected before I changed my mind! Rest of the stuff I've just collected over the week while tidying up - a weird sticky toy, a very dull small kitchen knife, some leftover christmas candycanes, sample mascara, a small showergel used up, and 7 sets of documents shredded.

total is 356.

Another big out today. As I type this I am watching two men take my shed apart to take away. It has rotted and has a massive hole. It was fairly empty but the men are also taking away the contents. I’ve also gone round the garden and they’re taking an old chair, tiles, tools, watering can away as well as lots of plant pots, a bird feeder, chemicals and boxes that I found in the garage. I feel so relieved. I have said before that exh was a hoarder. Well some of this stuff was left behind by the owner of his previous house and it filled our shed and garage. I’ve been slowly removing it for about 12 years and I think it’s all gone now. The garage still has stuff of his - a lawn mower, gazebo, tools, wood shredder that I’ll look at another time. I am still using an app to tell me what to declutter every day so I’m sure I’ll be back in the garage in a couple of weeks.

This is so awesome on every level! 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏🙂👏👏👏

4 items sent that I sold on vinted
A bag of baby clothes/ baby toys to charity
My ds is 7 and I'm almost 50
So not sure why I was holding onto them

2 more bits of dolls house furniture
5 dolls hats
2 dolls combs
4 dolls hairbrushes

Total is 1981

Dd emergency annual review was utter hell on earth today. So hard. In fact if someone offered me a time machine today I'd go back to my twenties and get sterilised.

Things have really got to change and even if dd can recover from her epic deterioration of being "a pupil of no note" four months ago I don't think we will ever be the same.

ASD rules our world. I like caous, clutter, ( talked about the element of self harm in hoarding in my course yesterday too).

I need to buck my ideas up and get to constant, routine and calm for dd. I need to be someone I'm not.

I filled a carrier bag of missing matched tupparware and a another bag of shoes that are still to go. What a horrible day. I sat through a hour of hearing how broken and vile my 9 year is. I fucking hate Autism. I hate everything about it. I hate that I'm possibly autistic and caused this too.

Dd is happy as Larry.

I don't know what to say Incessant 💐 . You've got so much to cope with.

@IncessantNameChanger no words. Just try and take care of yourself. You will get through this. Xxxx

@IncessantNameChanger that's tough. I was talking to someone earlier in the week whose having struggles with her DS not having been in school for nearly 2 years. The lack of support is shocking.
Please don't blame yourself for any of this.

*who's

I’m sorry, @IncessantNameChanger, that sounds horrendous. You are not broken, your dd is not broken, we live in a broken world.

Thinking of you.

Found a local swish on this afternoon!
Quickly removed the boxes of clothes that don't fit or I don't really like but might wear one day to donate - I'll also pick up any new stuff that seems nice but overall I will hopefully have converted a couple of tubs of useless-to-me clothing into a smaller amount of more exciting new-to-me/my family stuff.

@IncessantNameChanger Im sorry, it is hard because you have to micromanage your dc’s lives and then listen to them be criticised. Sending hugs.

Thanks everyone. It's true we live in a broken world. All this vitriol about her, no one wonders why she has fallen apart so drastically so fast. Camhs was consulted without me. I ASKED to talk to camhs, yet I was denied to be present at the meeting?! I gad voice at that meeting? I asked for a occupational therapy reassessment but i could be present for that either? Camhs signposted to NAS. ABSOLUTELY FUCK THAT SHIT!

What utter pointless stupid bollocks is that? "Have you heard of the NAS?"

Well bugger me, no I haven't you mean there is a charity for ASD? I had no idea! I'm sure once I read about ASD my girl will be fixed. Praise the Lord for such a miracle.

I'm mad. It's like being diagnosed with depression and the best someone can do for you is signpost you to the nhs website. Utter twattery

Incessant the lack of health care of any description in this country is really beginning to scare me. It feels like we're becoming a third world country where anyone suffering in any way is left to get on with it and nobody cares.

Out goes one dress that's a little bit small. Total is 1982

Sorry you're having such a tough time @IncessantNameChanger I hope you can find some support somewhere, it sounds exhausting

Spent this afternoon going through the final area I was yet to work on in the kitchen and got rid of about a bin bag full of bits and pieces, tat and paperwork. Pleased to be able to tick off the kitchen finally, so now just the coat cupboard and cupboard of doom to go.

Feels like I need to go back round to other rooms I've already done though (I won't until I've finished the first round everywhere though). Nothing major, but I'd say a good hour in each room would make them tidier and gather another few bags full of rubbish.

For those of you that have 'completed' a first round, how was it going back round a 2nd time? Deflating or uplifting? And for those of you that had a single cupboard/room completely filled with everything and anything, how did you manage to get through it all when it was all in such a concentrated area?

Took some stuff to charity shop today. Hoorah.

@IncessantNameChanger I send virtual hugs 💕

An emotional chuck out here this afternoon. A couple of small carrier bags that were amongst the photo mountain I previously sorted yielded memories of long ago.

Cards - I kept them because they had been written by my late mother before she lost her sight.
Baby stuff - photo album of our DC (who was very prem) looking really tiny.
Letters of yore - some a bit sad as they were from friend now divorced and reflect previously jolly family life.

The upside is that I parted with quite a lot of stuff, just keeping a small amount of core memorabilia.

Interesting segue - baby photos from friends and DHs former students. One called their baby CLee. I wonder if that’s a nickname or actual birth certificate name 💭

Other success today - bag of now too big thangs to the charity shop. That’s a win win 😀

@IncessantNameChanger sending hugs your way. Sounds so tough.

I ditched some paperwork in the office shredding bins so the shredding pile is slowly going down at least.

Had some friends over today

71. Children using up some craft kits
72. Friend took a thread organiser

@IncessantNameChanger sorry your meeting went badly.

Hey all, fell off the thread for a bit but am back, second half of February I lost momentum. Had issues with DD and a new teacher and rest seems a blur. It seems to be resolved for now. @IncessantNameChanger I am so sorry you are having a hard time. The support really is shocking. I remember having an occupational therapist assigned to us and after one phone call I said not to bother anymore as she was so rude and her advice to getting DD to get dressed in morning was ‘get up earlier to have more time’. The best support we have gotten has been through charities. On a plus side with. T daughter’s ASD she has been fixated on ‘home edit’ type videos and wants to go through and organise each room in the house. Going to take it while it lasts.

im trying to get back into the flow of decluttering. Husband had a skip delivered and cleared out our garage.
Current total at 1276

daffodil it's great going round again. I think I'm finished the first time, but there's always more I can let go of each time. It really helps knowing several months have passed and I still didn't use it. I also like to take time to decide, so I might leave something and I'm not consciously thinking about it but I must be somewhere in the back of my mind, because on the next go round I'll often get rid of it. This is how to tackle the dense areas of clutter too. Move on when you get decision fatigue, knowing you've got rid of some and you'll go back to the area again in future. I didn't do the whole place, I kept going back to the same area if I wanted to or if I'd changed my mind about keeping something I'd go fetch it there and then to get rid. I'll often declutter an area if I need to go in it to get something, I'll return later to see if I can let go of anything because I've usually seen something that's a maybe. I'm not worrying about what any particular area looks like. If an area is annoying me I'll focus on that, otherwise I'm mainly taking the approach of celebrating any item that leaves the home regardless of where it's from. If one area ends up completely clear it means I can spread things out from a more cluttered area, so it doesn't matter what I focus on, it all helps.

Another two outs from baby things. A coat and a hat. Total is 1984

Recently I've been sorting the horror areas - namely shed and loft. It's been done before but I'm still amazed at the endless stream of crap that I'm getting rid of.
Been decluttering for a long time. Life is busy. I've been working in ever decreasing circles, getting more ruthless each time.
I'm finally feeling that I can see light at the end of the tunnel and hope that this will be the year where I have curated ( if that's the word) all my possessions, everything has a home, abd I can finally relax into just maintenance decluttering 🙏
Luckily I have a family that's either on board, or resigned to it all!

@IncessantNameChanger my husband and my 10yo are on the autism spectrum. Every so often I feel overwhelmed and get really despondent feeling I should have done this earlier or that differently. And I have my own shit to deal which is not inconsiderable. I am really sorry to hear you are going though such a horrible time. Thank you for making me feel that I am not the only one trying to batter down brick walls with my bare head.

The last couple of days have been a bit difficult. Thanks to this thread and the fabulous Dana K White I filled a black bin bag and a similar sized donate bag and put at least the same volume into recycling bins. Little areas of less clutter and more space are making me feel better.