Right - I want to get sorted now H has left...........where should I start????

[FAQ]

He's took the stuff he "needs" (and can fit in the room he's renting) - the rest he's says I can box up and put in the attic until he's sorted with somewhere bigger/on his own (as long as I label the boxes in case there's something he needs before then).

Now I'm not sure where to start.

The bedroom that was the office (computer is now downstairs) is full of loads of papers/stuff/cr*p most of which can probably be sorted and boxed up, and the books tidied up and put on the bookshelves.

My kitchen cupboards need sorting, including the cupboard under the stairs (which doubles as my "pantry") - again I think quite a bit of his stuff in there.

Now the dining room/living room need sorting too - the dining room table is was a general dumping zone for papers and things, most of which I think are mine - there's still space at one end to sit and eat meals at. The downstairs bookshelf also needs sorting, and it needs a general tidy up.

Bathroom could do with a good clean and drawers sorting to get rid of all the nearly finished bottles of stuff.

My bedroom isn't too bad so don't think I'll do anything with that just yet.

The DS's bedroom is also a disaster zone, toys/clothes/everything needs a good sort through and the junior divan (which H insisted we kept) just takes up too much space and I want to get rid of it. Junior/single beds aren't expensive so when DS3 is ready for a bed (not for a long time yet) I'll buy him a new one......

So where do I start??

Do I start with the "general" tidying up?

Or should I start upstairs in the office......if I do that any boxes of stuff I get packed up can stay in there until I get round to getting it in the attic.

ARGHHH where to begin......

General tidying up leads to endless tangents and diversions and you can't see any immediate results, IME (although I should point out early on that I am a slattern).

So pick a room - any room - and get it clean and tidy. The joy you will feel will motivate you to start the next room.

I didn't think I was that much of a slatttern until yesterday..

have a general tidy up then tackle one room at a time. i would tell h that if he wants his stuff storing then he needs to put it into a proper storage facility, and not just expecting you to keep it for him. or tell him if its not gone by a certain date you will get rid of it. got and get lots of boxes from your supermarket and use them to help you sort the stuff out. then when you know how much you have got of things, you can invest in proper storage solutions. And now he had gone you can do what you want with the stuff in your house!!

Good Luck my x left last May and im still getting sorted out
I started on the kids room and gutted it painted it, new beds and have slowly decluttered the whole place A LOT.
Now im doing my room
Currently waiting for the paint to dry on a mangly bit of furniture ive overhauled with a coat of gloss

FAQ - thedevilwearsprimark was looking for you - isaw it on the unanswered threads.

Angel - no I've said I'll put the stuff in the attic until he's sorted (there's nothing up there at the moment and I HATE going up there as I'm terrified of going up and down the ladder ) so I'm unlikely to want to store anything there myself. He's renting a room in a houseshare at the moment - so he's got nowhere to store it (and I know for a fact that the finances simply aren't available to put it in proper storage facilities right now).

I don't mind it being there (in the attic).

Charlie - I want to get decorated ("we" were talking about re-decorating for the last 3 1/2yrs since we moved in LOL) but that will have to wait for finances.....in the mean time I just want to move his stuff out of the way, and get my own stuff in order/reduced - but don't know where to begin (it's a big task looking at it LOL).

• so typical of an MN thread........no-one has suggested where I actually start with it yet (lots of other helpful suggestions/ideas though )

Ok start with rubbish, paper work, either horse it into boxes to sort later...or actually do it
Recycle or little bonfire later?

was that a coded message to suggest starting with the old office/spare room??

You need to start with the bathroom so you can have a nice long soak at the end of the day knowing its clean and tidy!

Then move on to

your bedroom - i know you said its fine but you should at least was the bedding and give it a quick going over, imo this is the most important room to do in your situation.

Then get a bin bag (well quite a few) AND GO ROUND EVERY ROOM PICKING UP AS MUCH RUBBISH AS YOU CAN (oops)

Do the living room/ dining room then kitchen including the cupboards ( i did my art cupboard yesterday i was dreading doing it but only took me 10mins!)

I'd do the DS's room. If you didn't want to keep the divan and your partner did, it will feel instantly gratifying to get rid of it and will instantly create more space to get their room sorted. And perhaps feel like a positive change for them as well.

Can your partner come round and sort his study out himself..don't see why you should do all of this yourself?

Office and bookshelf are at the bottom of the list of things to sort out imo

Your ds's room will take you a whole day minimum (if anything like my dd's who are reasonably tidy, dd1 just insists on bags upon bags upon bags crammed with crap which i have to go through to make sure i'm not throwing important stuff out)

You need storage even if its just plastic boxes before you even attempt dc's room imo

I only changed my sheets on Friday - and I'm not that dirty - honest (and I only sleep for 4/5hrs at night so hardly in it LOL).

Office is a lot of my stuff that needs tidying up too - infact I spent more time in there than he did One of the filing cabinets has a lot of my papers in (which need to be transferred to my "new" filing system), and all my music books are still scattered over the floor.

Hatty - I can't get rid of the divan today (want to sell it or freecycle it.....haven't decided which yet) - and I want to make progress that's visible today IYKWIM.

Ds's do have storage in their room - it's not very well used (ie most of the plastic drawers are empty ).

The office will also be where I put the boxes until I've managed to get a friend round to help me put the stuff in the attic......not sure I'm brave enough to go up the ladder AND take something up with me at the same time.

With regards to H sorting the study - he has already taken quite a lot of stuff from in there (most of his work boxes were lept in there and they've all gone).

Sorry all jumbled up my answers aren't they.

Think I've sort of answered my own question - going to start with the office.............

Go on then and let us know when you're done

How old are your dc's? How long do you think it will take you?

Just a thought but couldn't DH actually box the stuff he want to keep for later himself and put it in the attic himself. That would sort at least half of your clearing up.

Also it'll be at least 2 week until H can come round and sort any more of his stuff up to put into boxes....and I don't want to wait that long. Plus it will feel satisfying to put it all out of the way as whenever I have made the effort to tidy all my bits up in the office it's never really made much of a difference as his stuff was still htere "and he'd sort it"..........

MYG - DS's are 7,4 and 9 1/2 months. DS1 at school at the moment, DS2 wants to go on cbeebies website this afternoon (excellent he can spend as long as he likes ) and DS3 will go for a nap in a while....

Start with your bedroom - move everything round and blitz clean it and make it YOURS. If is already clear it will be quick and easy and a moral booster before you then tackle the hardest room - the office. When that is clear you can take the papers out of the dining room and sort them out in the office. Then do the kitchen and the bathroom straight after. Get the kids to 'help' you do their rooms. Finish them off by yourself!

Bonne courage

/link{www.flylady.net\flylady}
Someone had to say it!

Sorry flylady

I've tried flylady before (several times) and never got on with it.......not helped by the fact that I'd check to see what I should be doing next and spend the next 3hrs online

Bathroom first. Empty it of all of everything and clean it everywhere really well. Only put back exactly what you need - store half-used bottles elsewhere and gradually use them up, as you had planned (you might also be able to decant a few?).

Then make sure your bedroom is perfect and gorgeous.

After that, you can start on the rest of the house - it will take some time - knowing that you have your bedroom/bathroom sanctuary to retreat to and feel glamorous in when you have been getting sweaty/dirty/cross with the rest of the house.

well I've started on the office - already cleared the top of the bookcase and filing cabinets - put my stuff to one side to file another time, and boxed his stuff up.

I can't face doing the bathroom today - I have to get the ladder out to reach the top of the tiles to clean them .

Also I'm never going to make my bedroom look "gorgeous" - not until i've got a carpet or something on the floor, and redecorated LOL.

Noooooooo, FAQ, you need to start a control journal and put your "habits" into it. That was the only thing that stopped me going on to the computer and of course on to MN! If MN closed down, I would get a LOT more housework done!