Don't know where to turn

[Jbear59]

Not totally sure why I'm writing this. I feel totally overwhelmed by life. I'm a full time working mum, pretty stressful job with an hours commute although I work from home a couple of times per week.
I have a 10 Yr old son, a dog, cat and partner. My life feels out of control and I am only just keeping my head above water. The house is a constant mess, laundry piles up and up. My list of to dos Is so long.
I don't enjoy life, I am simply surviving. I have a couple of major health issues including a sleep condition which causes excessive day time sleepiness and hyperthyroidism.
I'm shattered. Recently my brain feels like it can take no more. I'm struggling to keep up at work, I can't make even the most basic of decisions. I mean literally I can stand in the supermarket and debate which pizza to choose for 20 minutes. I'm drowning.
I feel like a total failure. As a mum, as an employee, as a partner and friend.
Sorry for the doom and gloom. Any tips on how to make life feel just a little bit easier?

Sorry you’re feeling like this, does your partner help with the house at all? If you can afford it it might be worth getting a cleaner/home help for ironing etc once a week to keep on top of things.
can you go back to your doctor and see if there’s anything else they can do to help you with your sleep condition?

Are you on the right dose of medication for your thyroid? These are all symptoms you can get with hyperthyroidism. After the initial surge caused by your increased metabolism, everything comes crashing down.

Sounds like you’re heading for a breakdown, something needs to change.
Are you peri menopause age?

Why aren’t your partner and son doing their bit?

Try dirtea, lion's mane, a got send. You feel alert all day!

Purely from a housework point of view, I really recommend Rock the Housework/ TOM Rocks by The Organised Mum. Most of The Organised Mum Method is free to access and it gives a structured approach to domestic jobs. The Rock the Housework/ TOM Rocks is a subscription, roughly £3.60 per month so considerably cheaper than a cleaner and gives access to hundreds of podcasts that will talk you through tasks. It's great for getting through decision fatigue, breaking jobs down in to managable chunks and there's podcasts from 5 mins to chip away at it, or an hour+ to reset or get on top of it. Some follow the structure of the method, some deal with one room, one task or multi-rooms. When life's getting in the way, I find it much more manageable to get back on top of things now and to keep maintaining the house at a managable level, and it's nice to be directed by a sympathic voice.

www.rockthehousework.co.uk/

Sorry to hear you’re feeling like this. I listened to a podcast today which I found hit the nail on the head, you are not failing because the washing isn’t done and we cannot possibly do it all.
i really would suggest having a listen! It’s called ‘The Mother Kind Podcast: Why you’re not failing if your house is a mess with KC David’.

It will hopefully change your thinking about your sense of failure x

*Davis

Routine and planning. If you can get the energy to make a 3 or 4 week meal plan which you can keep reusing/rotating, then you can order food online in advance in a regular slot, then that's a whole load of decision-making taken off your shoulders.
You can get DS and DP to help with this, have them there to unpack, and not have to dither in front of shelves again.
Things like laundry and cleaning can also be done as routine, eg school uniform wash on Friday pm, bedding on Saturday and so on, or you can send out laundry if you have any spare money, or get DP to take it to the launderette in a huge load weekly. If you can afford a cleaner, maybe think about that, otherwise rota DS and DP to do particular chores on specific days.
Revisit GP to check medication and health issues.
Consider if you could drop a day at work?
I don't think we talk enough about how tiring it is to work full time and run a house and be a good parent, and fit in things like exercise - it's just about manageable if you are in good health but if you have any less than perfect days, it all gets overwhelming pretty quickly. If you have to factor in commute times as well, that just adds to the load. We're all expected to juggle all of this as a normal thing, but actually it is an unreasonable expectation. It's not just you, you are not alone.

Just wanted to say thank you for all your kind words and tips.
I am going to try the podcast, am booked in at the gp for bloods.
Money is tight but despite that I am really considering reducing my hours just slightly at work to give me a bit of time to get stuff done. Really do appreciate everyone's time and responses.
My son is wonderful, not the most helpful but very understanding and a total joy. My partner is not particularly domesticated but very willing to muck in if given direction lol!