Finding good support

[MummyHippo2]

I was wondering if anyone used some help around the house and could recommend/reassure us. We are expecting our second child and have a 13month old. We are alone, and have no help from close family. With our first, we sort of bumbled along, surviving on the odd kind gesture, but for the future we need to enlist a small army (otherwise I'll lose my mind. or cry. or both). We'd like to hire some help, ideally a nanny/housekeeper combo so that they can be with us during the day (not all day, maybe 4-5 hours). Someone who can mind one of the children while I deal with the other, put some light lunch on, tidy up a bit, that sort of stuff.

Does anyone have experience with this? I'm a bit scared of letting a stranger in, and don't really know where to look for one. I don't know anyone who has this sort of support either.

Many thanks in advance for any recommendations, thoughts and pointers.

Use the Bubble app. You can post for sitters, nanny, regular help - it's a good place to start.

Do you work ? What makes you think you won't be able to cope as millions of people do ? Why are you having another child if you think you won't be able to cope ? Serious question not goady.
I struggled so only had one.

On the off chance you're a really big hairy troll I'll just say that I didn't ask for a lecture or a reprobation. I asked for suggestions for places to find help. My personal circumstances are none of your business so if you haven't got any useful advice maybe get on your high horse and buzz off. You are clearly an amazing parent fully calculated and level headed and we should all seek your wisdom and bow down to your expertise. Judgmental prick.

Thank you, never heard of this! Will check it out 😊👍

We’ve had all sorts. A brilliant nanny for 5 years, a student nanny who did wrap around care for a year, 2 au pairs and now a nanny/housekeeper/cleaner.
the first thing I’d say is that you are unlikely to get a nanny who will do housekeeping or cleaning. The nanny will clear up and cook for the children but rarely for adults in the house. We negotiated that our nanny would hang up/bring in the laundry for the whole house because I wasn’t having the washing machine go in 1/2 full of childrens clothes when there was a full load good to go.
one of our au pairs was brilliant and one was awful. These are young adults. I felt like I was in loco parents most of the time. The awful one was a liability. You can’t legally leave them with under 2s, but it works if you are around. We are still in touch with the brilliant au pair.
Our wrap around nanny was a stop gap, which worked well. Kids were a bit older, there was no need to pay for a FT nanny and she came to the house as we left at 7, did drop off and pick up and fed the kids. She wasn’t inspirational, probably let the kids have too much screen time, but she did the job at a reasonable cost. The nanny/housekeeper/cleaner……jack of all trades springs to mind. She is lovely and my life would fall apart without her. She does the hours I need; 4 afternoons a week. People who do this are like hens teeth. They don’t exist, and that’s the main reason I keep her. Within her hours she cleans the house, makes a family meal, does all the laundry and does the school pick up…all to a very mediocre standard. my kids are older now, so she really just needs to make sure they are fed and the house doesn’t burn down.
in your position id go for an au pair and a cleaner.

There are lots of fb groups for au pairs or check out childcare.co.uk or even gumtree.

Hope you find the help you need. Sorry I can’t advise but perhaps try advertising on local FB, many people are DBS checked these days. And great response to the unhelpful post BTW.