Cleaning nightmares

[Seboqueen]

N/C for this.

I've worked as a domestic cleaner for many years. I've had alot of 'interesting' encounters over this time and when i look back i'd say i've been unlucky with some of my clients.

These are a few of my nightmare experiences:

1. Poo: alot of houses i've worked in have had faeces and urine left across toilet seats for days. Occasionally the clients have left lumps of it down the side of the bowl and floor. These clients were too physically large to fit on the toilet. Urine becomes almost like gelly or flakes if left long enough. It takes a while to clean of, not something you want to see straight after breakfast :/

2. Non payment, delayed payment, wrong payments. So many clients have done this and on occasions have made arrangements for me to call back at a different time to collect and then not been there. Add to that they would claim they sent a text to rearrange. I didn't hang on to these people as the extra mileage all detracts from the pay.

3. Leaning across me to access cutlery drawers or kettles. It maybe their house but "excuse me" goes a long way in allowing me to get out of their way and in Covid times. Yes often these were men who were also prone to the no 1 in this list 😷.

4. Covid experiences: expecting me to clean around them, theatrical coughing and sneezing around me for fun, following me around, not opening windows, traipsing across wet floors,

5. Expecting messy, huge houses for big families to be cleaned thoroughly in less time than a 3bed semi. No cleaning done at other times. Floors covered in old food, clothes, belongings etc.Then get relatives or house guests to ask why it taking me 4hrs to clean the house. Even Usain Bolt wouldn't manage it.

6. Wanting me to sit so they can talk at me for an hour and then complain i haven't finished the clean properly.

7. Shouting at me for being 3mins late thanks to roadworks despite it being a 30min drive away and apologising for being late due to blocked roads.

8. Turning on heating after i arrive in a small flat in the summer with no windows open.

9. Expecting me to look after pets or water gardens when clients are away for no extra charge.

10. Increasing workload but not increasing time. Going from: no washing up to all dishes in cupboards left for days on side; one bin emptied to rubbish piled up in kitchen, bathroom and bedroom, Bed change fortnightly to weekly. Shelves and surfaces with one or two items to being piled up. Not answering messages to discuss time issues.

11. Deliberately giving the wrong alarm code and then asking me to set alarm after client has forgotten to set. house is 20mins drive away.

12. Wanting me to play with their young children whilst cleaning. It's a recipe for disaster and when i mention the possibilities of harm/accident s to be told it's because i "don't like children"....🙄

Some people are just downright awful. I feel for you. I remember one lovely lady cleaner telling me about a beautiful large farmhouse type property she cleaned. They had had a huge soot fall from the chimney into the lounge and just left it there, living amongst it for a week, until the cleaner went back! She had to go home and change before she could go to her next job.

People are just awful.

People can be so disrespectful and rude. Hope you can have the opportunity to judge with your feet.

I really feel for you! You shouldn't have to go through that. We've just employed a cleaner for the first time and she's amazing. Would never dream of shouting at her, never mind leaving poo stains! I'd be mortified.

I couldn’t do your job. You need a medal!

I keep my DC out of my cleaners way initially, however she’s been with us for 3 years and my 5YO adores her, so she gets 5 mins post clean to chit chat away

I’m disabled (as is one of my DC who has frequent toilet accidents due to ASD) so my cleaner does tidy as well as clean, and I pay double the rate she charges others because frankly she is worth her weight in fucking gold and has made a very difficult and dark part of my life a lot easier.

However I’m yet to leave a disgusting toilet, pay her late or incorrectly, tell her off for anything, or not increase her hours as needed (for example, an extra hour a fortnight now to change the beds because that’s now beyond my ability).

There are always people that want a good cleaner. Mine has a huge wait list.

And by tidy, I mean, stacks the dishwasher (but not a weeks worth), will put toys away, helps me put clean, dry, hung/folded clothes away (because ouch for me sometimes) empties my bins and cleans them, and has helped me slowly reorganise the house to make things easier for me.

@Futureself: yes I recognise the mentality of ‘don’t bother cleaning it up, the cleaner can do it in a few days’. Soot, like poo, tracks everywhere ☹️

@GetTaeFuck: you sound like a nice person and there’s mutual respect between you and your cleaner which is great. Finding good clients and good cleaners can be difficult. I’ve had referrals from some of the above clients and regretted it - in fact, I’d go so far to say that some of the non payment, regular cancelling at short notice and overloading on work was deliberate.

I’m very reliable, I do a good, thorough job and want people to be happy but I refuse to be on the receiving end of people who pull these kinds of stunts.