When do you do housework with two small children?

[Totorotummy]

Let me preface this by saying I know I don't have to keep the house clean but I want to because it makes me happy :)

I have a 6 month old and a 4.5 year old. We live in a small apartment where noise travels, so even white noise doesn't cut it if I want to tidy/clean when 6mo is napping/after bedtime.

It's a total shitheap here and I'm sick of it. Having a tidy home makes me happy, calm and gives me a sense of peace. Plus I feel guilty for my little ones with there being crap everywhere. I'm not expecting to have a sparkling home for a few years but I want at least a baseline of tidiness.

I try to do bits and pieces when 6mo is awake but I feel bad just leaving him by himself (he's pretty chill but still) and so I barely make a dent.

I don't think I can condition him to sleep through noise. I tried that with my first kiddo and it didn't work.

Am I just stuck with a shitty home and manic clean ups before people visit? Those od you with light sleepers/small homes, what do you do?

We both worked FT , I frequently work 13 hour shifts, so we employed a nanny who didn’t mind chucking the washing in the machine or throwing the vacuum round. The rest we caught up on as and when we could.

Are you saying you can't make any noise at all whilst your baby sleeps? That's ridiculous!
If you do t want to do vacuuming etc, then do so e sweeping, washing up, clean the bathroom/kitchen, dust. There are loads of quieter things you can do if you want.

Robot hoover is quiet and very low effort for you

Little and often. It's all you can do when they are young.

I have 1 particular job I do on each day, kitchen on a Monday, toilet on a Tuesday, hoover upstairs on wednesdat, Thursday dust up, I then keep on top of it day to day but know everywhere has had a good clean at least once a week. It doesn't always go as plan but I try to keep to it.

My DD2 was a light sleeper. I used to do all the heavy/noisy cleaning when she was awake (she didn't sleep much anyway) I would move her from room to room with me as I cleaned and chatted to her, sang and played peek a boo. When she did sleep I would do stuff like folding and putting away washing, mop the floors, wipe down surfaces etc.

OP,I promised it will get better.
When mine were young it was a mad dash to keep on top of everything and crippling guilt and anxiety that not everything is spotless.
I finally said to myself 'f*k it',I am not going to pretend that I hold some kind of superpowers.It also did not help that my exH was a total ass*le and was not helpful at all.
It helped a bit,I just explain to myself that they are little for such a short time that cleaning can wait,nothing is rotting,we don't live in rat infested hut.If you tired,you tired,if they need you,that's it.Relax and it will eventually start looking a bit better.They will play for longer,entertain themselves etc.For now have a cup of tea and breath.

I think little and often is the key; I quickly do the bathroom at the weekend before I shower when DH is here and do wiping and bleach randomly in the week, I do the floor after kids have eaten while they’re in their chairs for a minute after dinner, I Hoover whenever it looks like it needs it. I clean the sides after I’ve made meals. Each night I do a quick tidy up; preferably before they go to bed and get my 4 year old to help but if not I’ll do it quickly after they're in bed.
I think if everything has a place it can be tidied away to then it’s much easier to keep on top of it. My house is in no way sparkling and the deeper clean jobs are harder to get round to.

I cleaned with dd strapped to me - it was my job (caretaker) and no maternity leave where I lived. You can clean with babies

Is your flat dirty or just messy, sounds like mostly mess to me?
Get rid of 25% of your stuff, get some good storage, do some of the work whilst the baby is awake, no 6 month old needs to be constantly entertained, streamline your procceses.
Good luck

At random intervals, when enough of the family are occupied or elsewhere to get a run at it.

So when DS (22months) is in the shower I wipe round at least one bit of the bathroom before I get in, whoever is cooking dinner does whatever bits of the kitchen they can get done, the floors suffer although DSD does do an amazing job when she does them.

DS has adored the Henry since he was no size, so you get a little helper monkey cuddling it when you're vacuuming, which is adorable, but unhelpful, especially now he's discovered the on/off switch.

Without sounding harsh you just have to crack on with it as then they'll get used to the noise or hire a cleaner and go out for a couple of hours maybe?

Little and often as a maintenance clean and then mega clean once in a while!

Try and tidy up one area, perhaps where you relax when they are in bed, so you have one place that is tidy? That way you are not looking at it the whole time

Do you have a partner OP? If so that would be the obvious answer. I know if you are a lone parent it would be harder.

Life is easier if you keep possessions to a minimum. I know it's not fashionable, but minimalism is the way forward if you want to do less cleaning.
I am a cleaner, and every one of the homes I work in has so much stuff that spend half my time piling up clutter so I can clean around it.
It is so worth only having what you actually need, and creating a daily routine to keep on top of basic cleaning. Ie clean the toilet when you first use it in the morning, wipe the bath round while you're in it, take a load of with you on your way to the kitchen first thing. Find ten mins to put it away when it's dry. You can run the hoover round in ten minutes flat if the floors aren't cluttered. I can do it with a 10 month old under my arm if I'm not having to pick up stuff as I go.
Look at this: www.becomingminimalist.com ideas.

take a load of washing*

Look up The Organised Mum Method on Facebook.
Its a system for little and often that really worked for me.
I also had a light sleeper and got an old fashioned granny carpet sweeper for 'hoovering' and was really pleasantly surprised at how effective it was.

Oh yes. Alternatively a rubber broom - absolutely brilliant for picking up crumbs and hairs!

It was like this one

Is it actual dirt and grime or is is untidiness that's getting you down?

For dirt and grime, get cleaners in once a month if you can afford this. (Do a little every day all the same). Do a big tidy up the evening before the cleaners get there so they can speed through and get to the dirt. It's worth the cost because you will feel more relaxed about the state of your home knowing it will all be lovely once again in a few weeks time. They are worth it for the bathroom alone if they do a thorough job.

If you can't afford cleaners, then resign yourself to doing something every day and starting all over when your cycle begins again. It is drudgery but getting in the habit of it will strangely help your feelings of despair because you will know you at least have a clean bathroom/ bedroom, etc (for example).

For tidying, do it every day after the DCs are in bed. Try to end your day with a clean slate. This can feel incredibly tedious and one more thing to do when you are tired, but it's worth it to wake up and not step on something small and sharp on your way to the kitchen.

Look at storage solutions, including underbed bins/drawers.

Look at whether the DCs really play with a lot of the stuff they have. If you can get rid of some of it, do that. Or rotate their stuff so it seems fresh and exciting every few weeks.

Having a light sleeper makes you feel so anxious. You have my sympathy.

You can become quite fixated on managing the environment to guarantee sleep and gaining the all important space in your own head and feeling of being in control of at least an hour or so of your daily life.

Do you have a partner who could give you a few hours on a weekend just for yourself? You could sit on your bed and read a book, do your nails, listen to music, watch a movie from start to finish...

When they are in the bath you can clean the bathroom, once out can they play in a bedroom whilst you quickly do the bath? Same with the kitchen - clean the oven/hob/sink/kitchen sides whilst the 6 month old is in their highchair with snacks.

Run the hoover and mop when the baby is otherwise occupied, that should largely keep you on top of things.