Come and talk to me about cleaners - do you have one, would you like one, what do they/would they do?

[hunkermunker]

I'm an utter novice about such matters.

I have no idea whether I will actually employ a cleaner (DH seems averse) - concerns are do they wear your knickers on their head and run up your phone bill instead of making things sparkly?

It seems very grown up to have a cleaner. And I'm really not grown up. Although my birth certificate suggests I ought to be...

How much should I be looking to pay, should I decide it's a good idea? And are there any things I shouldn't ask a cleaner to do or should expect as standard?

I had one but let them go because I couldn't justify being at home and having one (despite being at home with a 2.5year old and a newborn ). I blame pregnancy hormones for that decision. Now I am a full time SAHM I would feel guilty having one, but if truth be told I am anal about my house and nobody could do it to my standards .

Bad pointers are (IMO) they have a tendecny to rearrange things without being asked. Ours always decided my kitchen cupboards should be organised a different way. If you are working hard outside the home (as it sounds you are these days) I would say go for it. Can't tell you the going rate these days though>

The going rate where I live (Oxfordshire)is around £7-£9 ph, I have found that you have to be quite structured in telling them what you want to be done. It does seem very grown up having a cleaner, but I found that it just took away the constant worry about cleaning the house, as I can now have someone come in and do that for me, and they do a much better job than I do. They usually take around 3-4 hours per week, and when hiring, ALWAYS ask and follow up references.

Thank you, CoV. I'd love to come home to a fragrant house, without crumbs. Where do the crumbs come from?! I'm sure they breed...

If you aren't used to having a cleaner, it's a good idea IMO to think about the different tasks that are required in a household and to start off by outsourcing discrete tasks ie window cleaning (to a specialist window cleaning company), ironing (either send out or have someone in but either way you will need to have somewhere to store freshly laundered clothes awaiting ironing probably once a week), bathroooms & loos etc.

As time goes by you will should be able with any luck to let your cleaner judge what she should be doing each week and she probably won't always be doing exactly the same thing ie one week she might do out the kitchen, the next she might do out a child's bedroom etc in addition to full-house dusting, hoovering and floor-cleaning.

Nothing is standard IMO.

i live in london, pay £7.50 an hour, 2x3 hours per week, she does an hour of ironing, cleans bathrooms, hoovers/dusts, cleans windows, sometimes does the oven if the rest of the house unusually clean. but its blimmin difficult to find someone good... i went through about 6 from an agency who all kept leaving early/hoovering or dusting AROUND obstacles rather than picking them up and tidying. now have one rec'd by a friend, though even then it can be tricky as people have very diff ideas of what is clean... i wipe down skirting boards once a week, my mother does it once every 3 years or so...

A cleaner can be absolutely fabulous - you come in after a hard day's work and the kitchen floor shines at you!

They pretty much clean your kitchen and bathroom (including floors), do any dusting and polishing, and hoover throughout. They don't generally do windows, but will if you ask them and pay appropriately.

They don't really do tidying and the jobsworth among them will clean around objects rather than moving them. This means that the night before the cleaner comes, you are frantically tidying up.

I would be lost without my cleaners. Friends have asked for their telephone number, but with no success. She and her dh work together and my place is spotless in an hour.

Without my cleaners my life would be dull, dusty and full of crumbs!

If they ran around with my knickers on their heads, so be it, as long as they leave the house clean.

Bump for late-night cleaner-havers.

Thanks for all messages so far. Bit scared of having to move clutter in order to get clean house. But also a bit worried that unless we declutter, I'll have to have a live-in cleaner to get the job done...!

I think it's a good idea to start off with someone for a relatively short time per week eg 2 hours, then think about increasing. Advantage of having someone for just a couple of hours is that there will be loads for them to do so less chance of them skiving. Also you might find it difficult to think exactly what you want them to do to begin with. It should be easy to agree with them to stay longer if you want to down the line, much better for them to stay at one house longer than spend time travelling between jobs.

Our cleaner used to do 2 hours per week when it was just dh and me, upped to 3 hours after ds1 born then upped to hours after ds2. She does ironing and the kitchen in a 2 hour visit and the whole house plus changes the beds in a 3 hour visit.

Seems like an awful lot when I write it down and feel quite embarassed - I only work part time - but I still seem to spend a lot of time washing, tidying, wiping things and it now feel an essential.

Pay £8 per hour in central London.

It would have been a little more inclusive if you'd asked 'Are there any cleaners there?'

Sorry, I meant out there ...

I've cleaned for a living since having ds. We're really quite approachable, you know!

Agree with the going rate

I don't tell my cleaning lady what to do. Quite the reverse in fact.

She tells me what needs doing and does it.

She is a total marvel.

The best tip I have for you is to recruit carefully. Very very carefully. Check references. CRB checks. Go and talk to them at their house - you can see how clean it is!

If you've done the recruiting bit right, you can relax and enjoy.

Mine does 7 hours a week but that includes all ironing and changing beds, cleaning oven, windows inside etc.

'Go and talk to them at their house ...'

Sorry, TED. I didn't think it through properly.

As I said, I'm not grown up enough for a cleaner - I can't even post about having one properly!

Forgive me?

And I am sure you don't wear knickers on your head, Des, or run up phone bills

I remember very vividly doing a market research evening with two women who talked about the dreadful things they did in the houses they cleaned, which coloured my view somewhat, shall we say...!

Gosh TED that was a tip handed down to me by my then next-door neighbour - a game old thespian jewish grandmother. Who was also fab. Have I said something inappropriate?

Ah, it's fine, hunker. Honestly

It's just that, from my perspective, it sounds like a lot of middle-class women talking about their cleaners as though they were fairly useful sub-humans

If you can afford a cleaner, you should get one. I do agree with other posts that two hours is enough, though. Not because they might slack, as was suggested, but because it's pretty boring, labour intensive work ... and two hours is enough without a break.

Initially, I should ask her if she wouldn't mind wiping the skirting boards and doors down; the places that accumulate dust but which don't necessarily loom very large on your daily schedule. After that, the world's your oyster!

With two to four hours a week, you will start to notice a real difference to your home.

With regards to tidying mess, it's a difficult call. I would love to tidy mess, but what if something goes missing? I shall be the one, perhaps, to blame.

And with regard to recruiting, I think you should stick a notice in the Post Office window, personally. That way, you can 'interview' a few people, find out whether you like the sound of them on the telephone, etc.

You'll feel much for obliged if you use an agency, and you'll pay through the nose. It's really important that you like your cleaner, and she likes you, so the relationship is more rewarding if you know that she's just a mum, like you, who's trying to earn a few bob while her children are young.

Anyway, I'm rambling, but I'd be happy to discuss it with you in more detail later.

No, Quattro That's actually quite funny, in context! It is exactly what I would expect a camp Jewish matriarch to come out with!!

But if I applied for a job, I wouldn't expect my prospective employer to visit my home for a reccy. In fact, I'd tell them to fuck off!

It's like the hairdresser's hair thing, or the dressmaker's clothes. If you do it for a living, you don't much feel like doing it at home

I am PMSL at interviewing a cleaner who told me to fuck off at the first instance.

She'd get the job

Sorry for the middle class braying tone of the OP. Nothing could be further from the truth, I promise. I'm just done in with working full time (esp as I work a Sunday and it leaves Saturdays as either cleaning days or going out days - so if we go out, I get to clean either when I get home and after the boys are asleep at night or while DS2 is asleep on the days I don't work). DH does a lot, but it still seems pretty overwhelming to keep on top of it all. I keep running out of socks, then having a laundry blitz and discovering we have a bazillion pairs between us all. It's madness.

The two cleaners were part of an agency (a well-known one, think of a letter, any letter, as long as it's M, double it and you'll have the initials of the company) and I was so unimpressed with the things they were saying!

What sort of rate, Des? Thank you very much - really helpful to hear your thoughts.

Hunker, it's OK!!! I didn't pick up on any middle-class braying from your OP. I just know that you're an intelligent, sensible lass, and that if you read it back again, it would have been better to ask the question the other way around!

True to form, you responded with the empathy you possess in bucketloads.

Well, with regard to rate, let's get sensible. If you're going to employ someone for two to four hours a week, it can simply be cash in hand. It has been since time immemorial, much like bar work. So, you're looking at no more than £6.50 per hour, £7.00 at the very tops.

If you employ another mum, who's just looking for a bit of pin money whilst her kids are in nursery/school, you should be fine. Just trust your instincts. If you think she's screwing the system, think twice.

But to be fair, most mums who clean for a living only have a limited window on the day in which they can work.

As I say, stick a notice in the PO window, or go with word of mouth (as I have been referred).

And please don't think I think badly of you for your post. We all do what we can to get through the day

Thank you, lovely Des

No, yes and whatever they did, I'd have to leave the house, else my workin class guilt would kill me.

I agree with you there! I have three cleaning jobs, and one where I pull pints.

All of them are with people (women) who run businesses, with the exception of one, who's a bachelor and he's never there!

Personally, I would hate to be in at the same time as the 'lady of the house'.

Perhaps that's something to think about, hunker. To put someone really at their ease, perhaps tell them that you don't expect them to clean a room that you're in at the time.

I can understand why you might not want to go out, initially, with a new cleaner in situ, but if you get the right lady (or man), I'm sure you'll come to an understanding.

And to reiterate, I don't think that people who employ cleaners are snobs. I just think that the relationship should be healthy and respectful, both ways.

I couldn't bear it if somebody was cleaning the house with me in it, let alone the same room as me - I'd feel dreadful!

DH is bound to be against the idea fullstop (for reasons of "we should do it ourselves"), so I might sneakily employ cleaner who he doesn't know about who comes while we're both at work...

You know what? That is do-able

Honestly! Just get someone who's trustworthy. He'll never know.

Your lie, in all fairness, could cost you a mere £12 to £14 per week .. but you've got to get the cleaning lady in on the act, or she might blurt

Go for it.