Clutter problem......................help!

[SpiritualKnot]

Don't know if this is the right place to post this but....

Oh dear. My brother phoned today to ask if he could come and stay this weekend with his wife. Love having people over so said yes. So I've got 2 days to sort the house out.

They haven't been to see us for years, last time was when we'd just moved in and had very little stuff. Now we've got loads. I know I can make the house look tidy, with everything in cupboards and wardrobes but I'm so sick of it. I've told them they can play table tennis in the garage so I can't do my usual dumping of the stuff in there.

I don't have to make the place look spotless for my brother, but having people to stay makes me want to sort things out.

My problem is I keep buying things all the time. For example, I've just found out I can buy specs from the USA for $8 a pair so I've bought six pairs. Do bellydancing so I've got a wardrobe dedicated to bellydancing outfits. Decided I need to tackle the clutter problem so I've ordered 3 different books from Amazon...why 3?...I don't know. I also went through a phase of buying swatch watches..again, don't know why. Bought about 10 and then stopped and waited for the next obsession. I work full-time and shouldn't have time to do these things...it's awful.

I'm not adverse to chucking things out, but I've done it so many times that now I'm left with all the stuff I want to keep.

Do others have this problem? If so, what do you do with all the stuff when it gets too much for you?

Please help!!

SK

If you have the book "Clear your Clutter with Feng Shui" (by Karen Kingston), there are a good number of explanations on why you may be "hoarding" things and how these things put you down.

I have to say that after the first chapter I joined all other people who wrote in the reviews saying that they found themselves in a clearing frenzy at midnight!

I looked at 5 books originally, one of them was a Feng Shui book, think it was the one you mention, Memyson&I, but I ended up buying 3 others instead. Are you still a clutter type person as well or have you improved?
SK

NEver looked back. Obviously I have some days when I get out of track but in general, as I feel so much difference (and much better) by avoiding keeping too many things, I can't bear clutter anymore. It rarely gets out of control, and it is more than 6 years since read the book.

lol

Ok. Sort things into piles.

1. Things you regularly use.

2. Things that are beautiful or of special or sentimental value to you

3. Things you have not looked at for over 6 months

4. Things that are not beautiful or of special or sentimental value to you

5. Things that may be useful but have not been used for over 12 months

Get rid of all of those in the 3 to 5 piles.

Be ruthless. It is very difficult at first to declutter as you feel you are attached to those things. But the more you do it, the easier it becomes. You realise that those items do not make you the person you are. Rather you are the person who chooses to hold whichever items you need and want.

now i am really interested in this! I have a terrible cluter problem. we are having to move as we are bursting at hte seems here... we are one bedrOom too short mainly

I just dont want the clutter to continue in the new place. maybe i ought to read this book before i move? might make moving easier and then keeping it going once i'm there... ?

wonder if its in the library as A) cant afford any books at the moment, and b) done have the room! ....

is it a big book ? Or can i dip into it in the eve before bed ( instead of being here for a bit! ) ?

gibberish, would you include books in your 3-5 piles ? or are these totally separate ? I love books.

Books too. Even libraries do plenty of "weeding"

Lol at the 3 books from Amazon - that is the sort of thing I do and then find I have to buy a new book case.

Seriously, having people to stay makes you look at the place from somebody else's perspective, doesn't it. I have exactly the same problem and I know what the answer is supposed to be, as do you by the sounds of it but doing it is another matter. .

You have to be ruthless and throw stuff out. If you don't believe it to be useful or beautiful get rid of it, or whatever the quote is. Sell the watches on ebay. Sell some of the belly dancing outfits. Get rid of anything that you don't actively have a use for.

Look on the bright side, if you sell some stuff you don't need you will have more money to start your next collection.

I think at the heart of it is understanding why you have to buy things in the first place. Can you get the buzz you get from shopping from something else?

I don't have any answers really - maybe I should buy a book too!

Thanks for that. Hopefully my books will arrive tomorrow, I'm sure that once I get started I'll be ok, but I just have so many lovely things now that I accumulated over the years.

I don't like doing car boots, I find ebay a bit of a faff. Maybe I'll just donate everything to charity. I've already put all my spare shoes and clothes in the Samaritans recycling bin at Morrisons..

Just read the other postings, might pop to the library tomorrow with susiecutiebananas to see if the Feng shui book is there, whilst I'm waiting for the others to arrive.

Thanks gibberish, I reckon about 90% of my stuff will be in the not looked at for 6 months pile. Books are a problem, I've sorted out a boxful and feel I can't bin them. It takes so much time though to sort them out, drive around to find a charity shop that'll take them...should I just bin them? I'm quite happy to...just need "permission" !!

SK

There are some very nice examples on the book I mentioned about how little sensible is to keep certain things.

i.e. she talks about people who needs to move house because they need more storage space. The cost of the move is thousands and thousands of pounds while the clutter that is going to be stored at that expense is practically worthless. etc.

You can't bin books - they might give some pleasure or be of use to somebody else. I wouldn't feel right about binning anything that could be used by somebody else or recycled.

I suppose if you conquer the hoarding, you do the trip to the charity shop once then you don't have to do it again for a very long time. Life will be much better organized.

Yes, books too unfortunately. If they are classics keep them, if you have not read them but are at some point maybe planning to...., if they perhaps may be of some use in the future

GET RID!!

You will NOT read them

You will NOT use them in the future.

And if you need to you can always get them out in the library and return them therefore keeping clutter to a minimum.

We have hundreds of books - no exaggeration - (are HEers...) but have to regularly go through them to get rid of those that we won't honestly ever actually look at or use.

And nooo don't bin them. Much to valuable to someone - take them to a charity shop or whatever. Just get them out of your house and hopefully someone, somewhere will make good use of them.

Errrm, too valuable, that was meant to be...

I remember a conversation between the head librarian at my university and my supervisor:

HL: As the section on XX subject is going to be closed we are binning those books to make space for other requests.

Supervisor: Oh don't bin them! I would be happy to give them a home!

HL: Oh no, we don't do that!

S: Why not??

HL: Because as soon as you move forward you will donate them back to us!

Niecie, you're right about getting a buzz. My husband reckons that's what it is. I buy most things online and love getting parcels through the door..pathetic really. Parcels turn up and I haven't a clue what's in them as I buy so much stuff that I forget!

Don't know what I could replace shopping with though. I sometimes think it's related to being unhappy at work and secretly wanting to pack it in and that's why Im stockpiling posessions...that's what I say to my husband. But it still happens when I like my job..

Interesting about feeling like moving house as I can feel that in me when I look at the clutter, but our house is really big for the 4 of us, so I know it can't be lack of space, it's purely clutter!

I've got the books in a suitcase, on my way to work tomorrow I'm goping to drop them off anonymously outside a charity shop...but if I find anymore whilst I'm decluttering, they're going in the bin!!

I don't know, I'm going to beddy byes now....crikey is that the time!! I'll catch up with this tomorrow, see if there's anymore advice....

Thanks y'all

SK

Good for you SK. A bit at a time - that's all that's needed. Don't try to do it all at once or you will become overwhelmed. Do a cupboard a day, or a cupboard a week - whatever you can cope with.

Oxfam have book donation bins at some recycling centres - I know a Sainsburys near us has one (next to the bottle and newspaper recycling). I put a load of books in there the other month (getting ot a charity shop when it was open and being able to park within "lugging distance" was a bit of a problem, so I donated the books to the Oxfam bin one Sunday morning.

SV laughing at the "lugging" problem. The charities who do well from me are the ones I can drive right up to with 6 bin-bags & deposit without breaking my back!

OP - I think you have a serious shopping problem ... but you probably know that.

I have a pretty clutter free life. I like my house to be tidy and I don't buy more stuff while there is clutter around. But it's a character trait I was born with, not one I had to train myself into.

Get rid of anything you dont want on freecycle as it takes away the 'effort' factor and therefore any excuses you have of holding on to things. And believe me, people will take anything.

Hi Funkyglass, I've just joined Freecycle on your advice, and offered my rabbit hutch to a lady looking for one. (Our rabbit ran away). So, thanks for that! I'll test the water with the hutch and then go from there!
SK

Great stuff! Much better than dumping it.