Team TOMM will it work for me and also my house is a total tip so need general advice

[milkncoffee]

As above really
Messy cluttered house and a big family so extremely busy.
Love the idea of TOMM and have started on Friday last week but it’s just a total mess after how many weeks do I see a difference as honestly I want to cry

I have four kids and have downloaded the app. It's got a checklist so even if you did your daily tasks and 30 minutes of that days room you will keep your head above water.

I find things like half term totally throw me off course. Also I'm quite the hoarder so I need separate time to declutter. Also if things are really behind you need to spend more time each day to start with on the tasks.

It's worth a try. I like it because the app which was £5 is very clear and makes me accountable with the checklist. But with 4 kids I have spent three hours today just on washing, drying folding and making beds 😭

It so so works!! But if your house is really bad then you need to do the bootcamp first so you’re just keeping on top of it weekly.

The only time my house has ever been constantly tidy was when I was religiously TOMMing.

Let us know how you get on!

I’ve been doing the daily level 1 jobs plus the boot camp since Friday I used the weekend to do 2 of the bedrooms but honestly can’t believe how many bags left the house but it’s not much better 😩 I’ll keep going but it’s hard as I’ve got to the desperate stage but want it done as I’m impatient

Yes I’m a hoarder it’s awful

If you need to declutter I would see that as a separate task to do alongside TOMM. It might help.to declutter by area or category and set yourself a small amount of time every day to just declutter. Dont take to long or you will feel overwhelmed. Just do 15 mins and set your mobile timer to count down. Work fast and dont linger on any object, if your not sure keep it or you might get stuck for the whole 15 minutes pondering over it

Thanks that’s good advice
I do tend to get overwhelmed by it all it’s just hard to want instant results but I know it’ll take a while to get better

I just got this book and was about to start a thread. OP are you all right with me asking here?

I’m living in a small one bed, open plan v small kitchen and lounge.

I’m really struggling, I have ended up decluttering things I wanted to keep, thinking it would help me to keep on top of housework.

As well as trying to work from here, I spend at least one day of the weekend with my elderly mum.

I’m not sure if it’s realistic to keep on top of cleaning with 30 mins a day. It feels endless.

I’m wondering if anyone’s been in my situation and made it work?

I used to be very energetic about cleaning but over the years, I’ve grown to hate it. I used to find it therapeutic to do dishes for example, but now I don’t. I used to iron bedsheets! I don’t know what happened.

So I’m just wondering if anyone is in a similar position. I do think it’s harder to keep a small space cleaner. If I ever had the skill of picking up after myself, it seems to have gone!

Yes absolutely @AcornAutumn ! Hopefully we can help each other so the more the merrier
I’ve thrown away things in the past I wanted to keep because I just got so fed up of the mess I think it requires a more methodical approach but I struggle as I think I just want instant relief from the mess which stresses me so I can sympathise

Small space or big space I seem to mess it up. Whether it’s my house or when I was in hospital after having babies my little hospital bay ended up a total cluttered mess somehow I think I need to address my basic organisational skills as well as having this routine as I’m just always in a muddle

I get distracted too rather than what I imagine most people do which is probably think ‘right I need to tidy this area’ and get on with it I’ll start, then think I’ll make a cup of tea, start again but find something I’d forgotten about and get distracted then start another job etc etc and just not be focused enough

One of many obstacles for me is an all or nothing/perfectionist mindset. If I can’t have the whole house tidy it feels like it’s not worth doing any. Stupid I know! TOMM maybe helped with this because I knew it would only be a few days before I got round to the next few rooms.

@milkncoffee

I get distracted too rather than what I imagine most people do which is probably think ‘right I need to tidy this area’ and get on with it I’ll start, then think I’ll make a cup of tea, start again but find something I’d forgotten about and get distracted then start another job etc etc and just not be focused enough

Thanks OP

This seems to happen to me out of boredom.

In my previous place (rented) it was bigger and there was a place for everything, now that’s not possible. My work table has to double as meal table, art work table and now keyboard table.

Wait, that’s quadrupled 😂

I’m now cleaning the oven while watching a documentary which is stupid because I cleaned the floor. But I just thought, the oven desperately needs it and I’ve got some energy this evening so I thought a big job was in order.

I’m trying to yell myself to stick to the schedule but it’s hard as I feel like I just need it all clear and tidy now !!!!!
I need to find some patience

@milkncoffee

I’m trying to yell myself to stick to the schedule but it’s hard as I feel like I just need it all clear and tidy now !!!!! I need to find some patience

I’m actually trying to do a blitz before I start it

It looks like you need to start from the declutter plan.

I don’t know what day I’ll start - probably Wednesday 18th - as mum has a hospital thing so I will be with her weekend and Monday and Tuesday.

I do want to stick to core jobs and half an hour.

The embarrassing thing is, I was laid up with a spinal injury and had a cleaner in a couple of times, though my long suffering friends did it the rest of the time.

The cleaner was booked for two hours and finished in 90 mins.

My friends seemed to whizz round like professional cleaners. Admittedly there wasn’t much happening in the flat while I was confined to bed!

@Iwanttogetthisright

One of many obstacles for me is an all or nothing/perfectionist mindset. If I can’t have the whole house tidy it feels like it’s not worth doing any. Stupid I know! TOMM maybe helped with this because I knew it would only be a few days before I got round to the next few rooms.

This is good to know. Before mum needed care, I used to spend about half of a weekend day cleaning.

I think you need to watch Gemma's videos too where they go and sort someone's house out with them. They are really good for seeing how much you can get done in a short space of time.

But you need to give yourself credit for what you have done so far. This is a journey of a thousands steps and you are already on it. It will be perfection but right now you need to wade through the clutter and make do.

As well as TOMM I actually have a laundry schedule too. First load needs to be in first thing in the morning or set the machine to come on first thing and load it the night before. I alternate days so Monday is stuff that needs sorting (such as darks which includes underwear and pyjamas) and then Tuesday the children strip their beds and load it into the machine. Now I have teens but even young children can strip a bed (plus they do the half fold back that Gemma features on her videos to air the bed). It means I don't spend day after day folding laundry.

I tumble the boys' bedding, chuck it on the landing and then wash their bathroom towels, again chuck it on the landing when clean and dry and they put it away/on their bed.

Well today l have tried a new approach gave my 2 year old the iPad and took the baby to each room with me and got the level 1 jobs done plus I’ve cleared my hallway and stairs
When they both have their nap I’m going to declutter something then stop rather than spending the whole day stressing and trying to do everything and getting nowhere

I think I need a laundry schedule @OnTheBenchOfDoom I have far too much of it in a big pile

Just baby steps. I think DS2 was about 2 when I finally had it all under control and that was because Ds1 was in school.

You have a baby and a 2 year old! On the weekend get your partner to take over full responsibility for the children if possible and you crack on but also take breaks from it. If your partner kicks up a fuss tell him that you are expected to do everything with 2 children in tow.

Someone told me that the clutter/mess probably wasn't made in one day so it will take a while to undo it all to avoid feelings of overwhelm. That helped me not be as hard on myself. Progress, not perfection and 15 mins decluttering one small area 3 to 4 times a week. In a month you will see a massive difference or one hour on the weekend while DP has DC.

That's the idea anyway I still have quite a few cupboards to sort out but know I will get to it on rotation.

Sorry...posted too soon.
I tend to focus on getting level one jobs done each day, 15 mins decluttering 3 - 4 times per week depending on work/DC. Not really getting level two done right now tbh but doing a 'weekly home blessing' instead which is a flylady idea of doing 5 basic cleaning tasks in an hour to get the whole house clean enough. We also have a cleaner once a month so at least it gets a deeper clean then. That helps massively.

How long does your cleaner come for @MrsGatsby99? I’m intrigued by that idea as I don’t fancy having someone come in weekly!

@Sickofmysalary Yes, I prefer once a month (it's every four weeks). It's an agency and they charge for the job rather than by the hour so I am not sure as I am at work. But I would estimate they are here 2 -3 hours (2 people). Very thorough, consistent standard each time. I think most cleaners would stipulate at least two hours.

@MrsGatsby99

Sorry...posted too soon. I tend to focus on getting level one jobs done each day, 15 mins decluttering 3 - 4 times per week depending on work/DC. Not really getting level two done right now tbh but doing a 'weekly home blessing' instead which is a flylady idea of doing 5 basic cleaning tasks in an hour to get the whole house clean enough. We also have a cleaner once a month so at least it gets a deeper clean then. That helps massively.

As I’ve been tackling it this week, I wondered if a monthly cleaner might be a plan. I don’t mind the big jobs at all, it’s the daily stuff that’s driving me mad.

But perhaps I’d be better saving the chunk of time on bigger jobs.

I don’t spend much so it’s doable, but the only time I’ve had a cleaner in was when I had a spinal injury, it wasn’t a good experience. Probably bad luck though.