If you work, when do you get the housework done?

[crazychemist]

Looking for a way to stay on top of things as I’ve been finding it a bit tough recently - I’m 29 weeks pregnant with twins so I do everything rather slowly!

I was trying out the Organised Mum Method, but I found it Impossible to get stuff done on working days - I get home from work, spend 15-30 mins playing with DD (she’s nearly 4), make dinner (always something quick, rarely more than 20 mins), eat dinner. DH plays with DD while I load washing machine and dishwasher and I get her bath ready. I usually put away any dry laundry while he does bathtime, then I do bedtime while he unloads dishwasher. I’m back downstairs at 8.30ish to hang up the laundry. Life admin normally done briefly at about 9pm.

Is this just what happens when you work and have a young child? How do you ever get any housework done beyond laundry and dishes?

I do have one day a week off from work, so I tend to catch up with things then e.g. vacuuming, giving bathroom and kitchen a wipeover, any general sorting (there always seems to be something). But I feel really guilty if I spend too much time doing that sort of thing instead of spending the time with my DD, especially as she’s about to have her life interrupted by 2 squalling newborns!

So when do you actually tackle cleaning? Does it just have to be done when DD is in bed? Or do I just accept that the carpet will always look a bit rubbish by the end of the week and the kitchen is just always going to look more grubby than I’d like?

Never and/or weekends

I do half an hour a day at night.
Windows/mirrors Monday.
Dusting Tuesday
Deep Vacuum Wed
Mop Thursday
Friday extras.

I do a quick vacuum/mop every night of the kitchen and front entrance.

If you can afford a cleaner that takes a lot of it off your plate. Otherwise, weekends, which is pretty rubbish if you already have limited time with your child due to work.

Get a cleaner. You don’t have time to clean

I have a cleaner come in for 2 hours every week-it's money well spent in my opinion!
In between I'll do a cursory tidy and the kitchen is kept clean, but everything else the cleaner deals with....and also deals with it much better than I ever would! She's amazing to be honest

Laundry gets done by me in the evenings, and I usually get my kids to help out on a basic level (they're still small)

Agree you are going to need a cleaner. Twins and 4 yo is going to be tough. You are not going to have time beyond a quick wipe around. Whatever you manage now divided by 10.
I suppose your DD will go to school next september but by then you will have two terrorist babies going in opposite directions (I've been there - its fun but crazy!).

What does your H re cleaning? We have designated tasks - one bathroom each, I do food shopping/organisation/cooking and he washes up. He does most laundry and hoovering and I wash wooden floors and dust plus 90% of 'stuff/life admin'.

Cleaner once a fortnight to deep clean bathroom and kitchen.

Wash in the machine in the morning, unload into tumble dryer after work.

Load dishwasher at night, unload before work in the morning.

Get a big freezer and batch cook like a maniac. I do a big 10 portion pot once a week of bolognese/curry/chilli/casserole and portion it into servings in the freezer, so you've got a selection of things to take out to defrost in the mornings, then just add salad/veg/pasta after work as you're heating it.

I can only manage to hoover once or twice a week, but I don't particularly care.

So on an evening:
You:-
*cook dinner
*clear up after dinner
*laundry on to wash
*prep bath
*clean clothes away
*laundry out to dry
*dc bedtime
*admin

Your dh:-
*supervises dd in bath
*emptied dishwasher

You don't need a better routine, you need a more active participant in DH.

We have a cleaner. I would work fewer hours if we didn't, but I'd rather pay a cleaner and work more hours! I hate cleaning!

When I went back after 8 years as a Sahm/ very part time (3 kids fairly close together, worked more hours since youngest was 3) I told DH he needed to clean or we'd get a cleaner - cleaner it is...

I do realise that's a luxury, but either (in a 2 working adult household) both adults do 50% or you pay someone else from joint income imo.

Kids and husband :D

I will either load or unload the dishwasher while waiting for the kettle to boil for my cup of tea in the morning.

Everyone in the house does their own laundry - i.e. each person has a laundry basket and a day of the week to wash, dry and put it away. Therefore no laundry sorting. I don't buy things that need to be ironed. This worked with my boys from about age 5 and they were so proud that they were able to do it themselves.

Everything else - tidy and put away on a Saturday, clean on a Sunday. Gave the kids chores from a very young age.

Of course, none of this helps with newborn twins! But in about 4 years time you will have an entire army of helpers to delegate to.

Alas a cleaner is not currently in the budget. It was the plan when we were ttc, we were going to get one from September so that we’d be on top of things before baby arrived. Unfortunately, we hadn’t budgeted for twins! We’ve had to get various extra bits (double pram, extra car seat and clothes etc, might need to get a new car after my maternity leave), so cleaner is now beyond the budget for the time being.

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz, @UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme while it is true that I do more of the housework than my DH, I do think it’s really important that he has that time to play with her. He doesn’t have time with her in the mornings as he leaves first more or less as she wakes up, he doesn’t have a day off with her.... I’d rather have a messy house but them have that time together. Besides, if they weren’t playing she’d be under my feet and I wouldn’t be able to get things done as quickly. He also tends to do the less frequent but bigger jobs - bins, DIY, mowing lawn etc at the weekend when I have time with DD.

Sounds like I do just need to get a bit more done in the evening or at the weekend, or just get used to it being a bit scruffy!

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz

So on an evening: You:- *cook dinner *clear up after dinner *laundry on to wash *prep bath *clean clothes away *laundry out to dry *dc bedtime *admin

Your dh:-
*supervises dd in bath
*emptied dishwasher

You don't need a better routine, you need a more active participant in DH.

Yup.

I can't help with the cleaning (because my answer is a variant of 'never' ) but just on the nightly routine stuff, you really need to be alternating bathtime/bedtime/housework duties and expecting a bit more from your DH, because if nothing else when you have twins you will need your DD to be happy with him putting to bed more equally.

Bathroom cleaning can happen when your DD is in the bath (for now, at least, until you have twins to wrangle) so your DH could scrub a toilet and run a wipe around while supervising bathtime. Kitchen cleaning ditto when he unloads the dishwasher he can do the mopping once or twice too.

And a robot hoover for the floors!

Sounds like I do just need to get a bit more done in the evening or at the weekend, or just get used to it being a bit scruffy!

I would try for the evenings & get scruffy.

I try very very hard to have the weekends 'off'

I am a lone parent with 1 DC, so really I spend the weekends tidying & cooking, & the dishwasher etc.

BUT I refuse to go near a supermarket with DC at the weekend, it the last thing she wants to be doing as well, so I shop before or after work, or get a delivery.

Also I refuse to do any laundry at the weekends.

I do it Mon-Fri, usually put a load on before bed & use a heated airer in the morning or hand outside.
I get all School uniforms ready & folded by Friday night for the following week.

I have had to declutter a lot.

I say my house is never tidy but fairly clean

We to TOMM, one of us does bedtime while the other parent does the half hour clean. The other jobs get squeeze in around other things (wipe the kitchen while the dc do piano practice, clean the bathroom while the dc are in the bath).

I sometime catch up at the weekends. Putting clean laundry away is where I often fall down!

Honestly? When my kids were little, I didn't. Normally, the house would get so bad that something would have to be done, like once a month, and then myself and DH would roll up our sleeves and gt stuck in. It was always tidy and the kitchen would be cleaned everyday and we stayed on top of the bathroom, but that was it. I remember almost having a nervous breakdown because I wanted to clean one day and I spent four hours just tidying my DD's room. She was four at the time. It really helped when her school started giving her stickers for tidying as she loved them, and we did the same system at home. But we had pets and work and frankly, much more fun things to do then spend a day doing housework. I am lucky in that we both worked from home when the children were little so fitted in things like shopping on lunch hours etc. Now that my girls are teenagers the house is cleaner than it has ever been as they help with the housework once a week! Between the three of us, it is done in two hours. Honestly, OP, do not stress about it, if you can afford to get a cleaner, get one, if not, then just remember this is a time in your life where housework needs to take a back seat.

What does your morning look like?
What does your DH do?

You either have to be incredibly disciplined and get everyone on board, get a cleaner, or accept that the weekends will be when you clean. Or you do less hours at work.

Most people it's the weekend blitz, or cleaner, IME

He could do bedtime as well, giving them more time together and taking something off you.

As she is 4, he could put away laundry at the same time she is in the bath if the bedrooms and bathroom are on the same floor.

Get a cleaner if you can possibly afford it. No point in trying to do the impossible. Work, look after a 4 year old and then housework on top of that. It's too much. But decluttering does help.

Sounds like your fella needs to do a bit more and for sure you need a cleaner once the twins arrive. Cleaning is a rare activity here - but wipes are our best friends.

You probably need to accept a bit of mess. As long as bathroom, kitchen, clothing and beds are clean enough to be healthy, everything else is just cosmetic really. Your daughter will remember the time with you and her Dad, not whether lightswitches got grubby.

Little tip though - carpet sweepers are out of fashion but brilliant at quickly scooping up crumbs and making a floor look clean with minimum effort and time. If you drag the Hoover out, it feels like you have to then do a big proper hoover round, which puts you off getting the hoover out. Carpet sweepers are a quick spot clean, so it's not as daunting. Then it stays cleaner and you can do a big hoover once a fortnight or so.

I am struggling with this right now too. Was really good in lockdown and got into a pretty decent routine cleaning wise but now back to work and it isn't as easy. 1 DC and 30 at school! Followed TOMM before so trying to do a pared down version of that.

Night before
Get all bags ready and by door to leave house at 7.45am
Drinks/snacks ready in fridge
Uniform/work clothes hanging on wardrobes
Some days - washing machine on timer to start at 6am ready to hang before leave.

AM
Unload dishwasher
Make beds
Air house while getting ready (while weather permits)

PM
As soon as get in (if I sit down, don't want to do anything), unload bags.
Wipe kitchen sides, wipe one bathroom basin and loo
Hoover main traffic areas (stick hoover, quick hoover of hall and kitchen).
Make dinner

Meant to spend another half hour in the evening doing each room on a rotating basis but too tired for that at the moment so not beating myself up about it but just hoovering whole downstairs on a Saturday and upstairs on a Sunday and giving a cursory dust.

Any tips welcome.
I do have a cleaning company come in once per month so at least it gets a thorough clean then.
My main tip would be to set a timer. It makes me much more efficient.

Get a Eufy robot hoover- send it out each day and it will gobble up all the dirt meaning at least your floors are clean every day and you can focus on cleaning surfaces. Best money I have spent in a long time!- there is a thread on here where lots of people have become new Eufy parents and it has had such a positive impact for them. Congratulations on the twins!