Social distancing around the Maypole: Fledglings fly into Flylady thread May 2020.

[Lisette1940]

Welcome to the May Flylady thread Fledglings! We are finally coming to the end of Spring and, erm, what a Spring it has been. Keep safe everyone and a special shoutout to Fledglings who are in the frontline of the response to Covid 19.
Lane has been superlative with the keep calm corner and has had a truly magnificent engagement with fledglings all through April – well done Lane!!! I have totally abandoned my routines (and my clean eating) and have been flying perilously close to the ground but am ready for take off again. But we operate a no fledgling left behind policy and indeed Flylady herself stresses that you are never behind in the system – no need to deep clean the house first, just jump right in.
All are welcome here from longtimers to newbie and those lurking – we all follow this zone-based Flylady cleaning system:
There are five zones and at the beginning and the end of the month we usually straddle Zone 1 and zone 5.
(amend rooms to suit your house – I do the living and dining room together as it’s all one room in my house)
MAY
Zone 1 Hall, entrance/dining room (Fri 1 – Sat 2)
Zone 2 Kitchen (Sun 3- Sat 9)
Zone 3 Bathroom and another room (Sun 10- Sat 16)
Zone 4 Master bedroom/closet (Sun 17 – Sat 23)
Zone 5 Living room (Sun 24 – Sun 31)

Pop onto the Flylady website to have a closer look here but be aware that lots of emails arrive if you sign up.

Flylady has an introductory scheme called Babysteps which is a light 31 day introduction to the system – dressing to shoes, shining your sink etc here.

There is a morning routine and an evening routine to keep things ticking over and a weekly home cleaning hour to change bed sheets, mop, hoover, take out rubbish etc. Flylady doesn’t want us cleaning all day so she is very keen on using a timer. Clean then stop!
In addition each day has a purpose: see the daily focus here

Monday: Weekly home cleaning hour (can be split into ten minute sections and spread over week) here
Tuesday: Plan and play (Menu planning, family event planning)
Wednesday: Anti-procrastination day
Thursday: Errand day
Friday: Clear out bags, fill car with petrol, date night
Saturday: Family fun
Sunday: Lift your spirit

Launch pad for guidance every day! launch pad

Habit of the month of May is moving – whether that’s your daily get out of the house during lockdown or in house movement. – moving is not my strongest point apart from pottering around the house…
We also have a naughty corner as a restful break out space and a Keep Calm Corner (KCC). I suspect I’ll be better at the naughty corner rather than the latter but I’ll do my best! Not sure I can muster the memes but I’ll do my best to keep spirits up.
So welcome to the new thread (I hope I haven’t left anyone out): Lane, SC, zoo, Bower, KTCluck, Willow/Megiddo, foxes, That, averytiredMom, fluffliest, ED, Strawberry, Chic, Hazel, Happiness, Cineraria, We3, stressy, and give.

And breathe!

lane I get exactly the same after a video call, makes me feel quite miserable when we hang up! To the point where I'm starting to avoid them now. I just want to see people in real life!

sc I find zoom calls draining as well tbh! But I think that's because my kids do not behave well at all on video calls, they go completely wild and it's exhausting. Another reason I'm starting to avoid them!

I just miss hanging out with people where you don't have to constantly chat you can just kind of bumble along together. And I think that's the reason children (maybe just mine?!) don't do well with zoom etc, as my dd said the other day to her uncle on a call "I don't have anything to tell you I just wanted to see you" so because they quickly run out of things to say they then start getting bored and fidgety but won't actually just go away and let us talk in peace! Then the showing off and climbing the walls starts literally in the case of my little nephew who whilst we were all chatting the other day managed to split his chin open

Anyway... enough of my whining about zoom 😂😂 I find it all very interesting really how we are all adapting and getting used to new things! I'm honestly not really grumpy about it...much.

As for cuddles etc I don't do hugs either sc and hate kisses / hugs on greeting or saying goodbye, really don't miss that! The only people I really want to cuddle are the little people amongst my friends and family!

I’ve not tried family calls with DCs really. TBH I don’t miss my parents anyway but the two girls are not keen on video chat anyway. When someone calls me I just sit in my room instead. I’m really looking forward to a catch up at 10am tomorrow.

I’m a hugger. Not with everyone, and plenty of my friends aren’t which I respect, but I love a hug! Luckily my family are also huggers (although DS strays into just plain “no spatial awareness” and is all elbows when he leans on me!) but I’d really love to hug a friend 💕

I realised today how little we mix normally.no big extended family,few friends I social groups except lil zoo ballet and D's wellbeing.i think this is why we are continuing to plod on,our lives haven't changed massively other than our extensive walks are no more

Impressive lists today! Am I the only naughty corner inhabitant this evening?

LOL, preparing a salad for lunch, and some yoga are my only achievements for today, although I had hardly any clinical work to do today so had a good go at some research stuff I’ve been putting off.

DD’s new bigger knickers have arrived. There were whoops and cheers of excitement, wanted them on straight away, ‘they are perfect mammy I love them’ followed 30 seconds later by ‘they are not right! Fix them!’ Give me strength!

Bower sorry it’s a poor prognosis for your kitty. I’m glad you’ve been able to bring her home though.

Favourite shower scent - I’ve recommended it on MN before, I’m obsessed with l’occitane almond shower oil, both the smell and the feel of it. It feels really luxurious. I used to save it as ‘a treat’ but I no longer try to keep things ‘for good’ and have decided I’m worthy of a treat every morning. I’ve had to ban DH from using it though. It’s wasted on him

ta da
🏹enforced rule of nappy change/breakfast/clothes before TV goes on for Cagletini
🏹weighed self - down 2.8lb! Yay! Now below my previous lowest so I feel thoroughly back on track despite lack of motivation this week
🏹downloaded and printed some work, including putting together a week of maths
🏹changed the way DS researches Person Of The Week - hoping it’ll work a bit better
🏹searched for particular home ed books and gathered others onto one shelf. There must be some more in the piles of books in the hallway (moved there while we rearrange the Kallax etc) but it would be counterproductive to do that now!
🏹gathered something picture books to put away for Cagletini
🏹found an old exercise book to repurpose (ie rip out first page) for new Word of the Day work
🏹gathered some ideas to make a list of possible activities (some for all words, then will have an extra challenge that changes) for said WotD
🏹LOL/drying
🏹sat and relaxed with music on while the others were at the park
🏹maths and Word of the Day work with DS, a success!
🏹printed more maths so the first week after half term is sorted too
🏹nice chat with FSW and admired her very cute pets. Wish it was a longer chat though TBH.
🏹read loads (some of it sitting outside)
🏹English with DD1
🏹helped make dinner (salmon risotto)
🏹changed spare bedding and put in new ottoman to keep tidy downstairs
🏹final edit of tesco shop for tomorrow (in other words, added more items that I wanted up to the limit
🏹made an effort to catch up with the thread a bit... still behind though!

I have cooked last Wednesday’s meal today. Beef in ale and all I have to do tomorrow is make mash and steam some veg. Otherwise we stuck to the plan. Need to do another.
Monday:Sausage with caramelised onions, fried potatoes, beans and two Banty eggs.
Tuesday: Beef in ale with mash and cauliflower, peas.
Wednesday: Cod in batter, chips, peas.
Thursday: Veggie pasta.
Friday: Fish Pie
Saturday: Stir fry chicken with rice, peppers etc maybe Chinese sweet and sour.
Sunday: small Gammon to roast, roast Tattie, carrots, whatever green veg arrives in the veggie box. Lemon delicious.

Lane That is some list.
KTC Thanks. She is so sweet all the girls at the vets love her. She is glad to be home. She is almost blind. They say she is but here she sleeps on the sofa and she negotiates getting down via a stool. She looks and checks with her foot before she goes down. If the stool has moved she doesn’t go. We try and keep it in a set place half way along because she usually sits on either one of us or in the middle. She is quite small, grey and white with the softest coat I have ever felt.
I have had to make a sheet for her meds as we are on five now!

L’occitane is lovely the Ass. Head I worked with for years always bought me a lovely present at the end of the year and that was one of them. It was all in a little basket and another time she bought me a big bottle.

Whoever mentioned washing curtains thank you the boudoir curtains need washed. They are LA Hepworth. I love them and made a cover for an old eiderdown and a cushion cover. I need to do another cushion cover. I have fabric left over as I bought it from the mill it was produced in. There is one near us that makes John Lewis, LA and another well known make 🤔 the have a small shop you can get great discounts in.
So curtain washing tomorrow.
Right I’m off to bed. Feel a bit better tonight not anxious as long as I don’t think about the DCat.
Oh and Lane you are better than me re Oct I don’t have Apps including GP because I don’t know how to do it. I don’t know how to set zoom up and I have been asked to use it for a meeting. I would normally ask DS2 but he can’t come over. He has had to go to work a few times to check everything ok and because the alarm has gone off a few times. DS 1 had to go today. I think they have had to go through all the food and drink and chuck some out because t is out of date.

Lane well done on your weight loss!

We are very close to my ILs so it's been hard not being able to hang out with them, other than we can now, and have, since they are starting to lift restrictions.

We were unable to get DD a hamster today. She's devastated, but I had her call to find out what they had etc, they have none so she's going to have to wait a little longer. Probably until next month when the lockdown is supposed to be over. She must have overheard me talk to DS this morning though- he asked me when we're going to get the hamster, I told him all chores needed to be done first. DD got to work without even being asked.

DC ta das;

🐹 DD Vacuumed.

🐹 mopped.

🐹 DW rotated.

🐹 DS mowed lawn.

My ta das;

🐞 Pulled weeds.

🐞 3 more LOLs.

🐞 Dropped off school stuff at both schools, now they are officially done for the summer.

🐞 Planted some flowers with DD, until the wind picked up and drove us inside.

🐞 Sheets freshly washed, now about to go back on the bed. 3rd load will get put in the dryer.

I'm cooking breakfast for dinner tonight, so should be fairly quick and easy.

Hello can I join? Long time lurker but I’ve never actually plucked up the courage of joining because then I’ll actually have to hold myself to cleaning!. We moved into our home in feb and because it’s council it was a mess. I’ve finally got it to my taste (all white😂) but am really struggling with staying on top of cleaning.

Of course you can join us didmyhousethismorning all are welcome! No need to feel like you have to do all of it right away, just jump in and do what you can.

I ended up doing 6 loads of laundry today! The DC should hopefully keep on top of it now throughout the week.

I got my ironing done too, while watching hoarders on Netflix, and even had 30 minutes left to just watch and relax!

I work the rest of the week so probably won't have much to put as ta das.

dudmyhiusethusmorning welcome
Lanewell-done on weight loss

Feeling bit unmotivated today.lay here faff on phone an hour,still not up yet.cba.....

Hi it's We3kingsoforientareandabump with a name change. Been needing to get rid of my xmas name for ages (and also the bump since he's nearly 2, although I do still look 9 months pregnant). Anyway I thought since I've been missing from the thread for about 10 days then this was a good name 😂.

Weekend before last I had horrendous cramp. I very rarely have periods because of my implant but still do occasionally get the cramps. It was awful so I just lay about all weekend feeling sorry for myself. I have carpal tunnel as well which is really bad at the moment and the pain through the night means I'm not getting much sleep. This all left me in a pretty shitty mood for most of last week. Also because I'd done nothing at the weekend the house was just a hovel and I couldn't seem to get on top of it which just made me stressed as well.

We then had a fantastic weekend with the DC because they were joining in with camp at home for scouts. It was just what we needed to cheer us all up.

Flying wise got upstairs sorted Sunday and downstairs yesterday and I'm now caught up apart from a bit of washing and ironing so don't feel as overwhelmed with it all now.

We've started having a family film every evening as well which is nice because once 7pm comes round that's it whatever didn't get done gets left until the next day and we all spend some time together.

Schoolwork didn't go very well yesterday. DS1 was tired from the weekend and DS2 for some reason decide to spend all day doing half a maths sheet. Going to look at our schedule and see if we need to tweak it a bit.

I also had to think about return to school for DS3 as he is reception. It's pretty much all I thought about for 3 days but when his teacher rang on Wednesday I told her he wouldn't be going.

Read all of the posts last night but there were literally hundreds so I'm just going to give you all a 👋 for now and I will keep up and not disappear again scouts honour.

Great name littlemissawol 🤣. Sounds like you are doing quite well all things considered. These are strange times. I love the idea of 7pm movie time and leaving things not completed at that point

I feel like littlemissdefeated sometimes.

Breakfast then I'll put links up.

Morning fledglings

Welcome didmyhouse!!

Welcome didmyhouse

littlemiss i have carpal tunnel too, had it on and off for about 8 years now!

I neeeeeed some motivation please?

Hiya awol lovely to see you, and welcome mornin :)

Sleepy. Not got up yet. Or taken meds. Oops. Cagletini was up a lot in the night.

Glad DD1 is safely off at school and that I’ve got DS’ work ready.

Tesco shopping arrived which means I can have breakfast at least!

Good name littlemissAWOL and welcome, didmyhouse! Just jump in, we have happy to have you. No fledgling left behind!

Bower, glad I have inspired you with curtains! Our room is so much better with them done and I really want to wash DD's but her room is SW facing and roaringly hot from 2pm to sundown at the best of times. Even with a blackout blind as well it's hard to control the light / heat in there, so I will have to wait for a dull day, which seems counter intuitive!

We had a dreadful night here as Megahound decided Ds1 and Ds2 cooking at 1am was clearly an intruder and got up to protect the fridge. Then a fox got going, barking, a bit later so he answered him for a bit. I feel like I've been up and down all night!

Lane, hurrah for the weightloss and bits of homeschooling going well! I'm trying to decide how cross I am that the online school I'm paying £600 a month for is using Twinkl worksheets for DS3. Somehow, while I'm actually paying for it, I expect a bit of ingenuity from the teachers, probably unfairly. But I have a background feeling I could be doing it myself...

Happy birthday to MrFoxes and 🍒🙋 all round to everyone else. Zoo, hope you can get more rest today, you've been running on almost-empty for a long time.

Right. Ta das so far:
♥️ DW rotated
🧡 Cloakroom scrubbed
💛 Kitchen surfaces cleaned
💚 About to hang (yesterday's LOL out
💙 Sink shined (shone?)

To dos:
🌊 S&S upstairs
🌊 Make beds
🌊 Finally sew a facemask
🌊 Go to Tesco (urgh)
🌊 Mop kitchen floor
🌊 Get DS3 to change his bed
🌊 More LOL
🌊 Do some writing
🌊 Ring DM
🌊 Replan days so I can work / think as well as just do housework and cook. I noticed last week that just keeping this house / family running with all of us here (and 2 people nocturnal) is taking absolutely all of my time. I know it's a common theme on MN that "housekeeping doesn't take that long" and "life admin is a myth" but I'm not sure that's true with everyone at home, making a mess, all the time. On the one hand I feel a total fraud, still being a SAHM with a little side-income almost 20 years after I stopped work to have DS1; and on the other hand, were I to not be at home we couldn't HE the two youngest and DH couldn't do his job - under normal circs there's international travel, often at a couple of day's notice. DH often reassures me that keeping the DC on a even keel and the house running with food, clean socks and approximations of clean bathrooms and kitchen and the younger DC educated and the finances managed so money is where it needs to be, when, is a full-time job in itself, but I know people outside our family look at me a bit sideways; even my DM and my DSis, because she has A Proper Job in a shop.

There were all sorts of milestones I was going to hit that I didn't - I was going to go back to research when DS3 went to nursery, but that's when DS2 got ill; then when DS3 went to school, but 3 months later DDad died suddenly and I had to put it all down to support DM. Then when he went to Junior School, but that's when the wheels came off for DD and DS1. Now I'm looking at "when DS3 goes to secondary" in September 2022, but I don't know if he'll even go to bricks and mortar school. His emotional regulation is so fragile, and his dyspraxia / autism in need of so many breaks in lessons etc that I don't see how he, or a school, could cope.

Meh. Have written an essay, sorry. Back to it. Speak later.

Morning all!

Great to have you back LittleMissawol! Very well done for catching up though sorry you were in pain in the first place. Camp at home sounds ace! I reckon I might make the same decision if I had a child in reception (and wasn't a key worker or anything) but strongly feel "each to their own" on this specific school issue! It's a difficult decision to make!

Imho, there are far too many threads on Mumsnet ATM saying "people should be doing or feeling X or Y". This is an unprecedented situation - the pointy heads don't know enough about the virus yet - it's an uncomfortable fact but no one knows precisely what to do, think, or feel for the best yet surely? Arrrghhh!

And a very warm welcome to Didmyhousethismornin! Good to have you with us!
Please don't stress about having to be on be Flying wagon all the time; many of us frequently fall off and then jump back on! "No perfectionism" is one of Flylady's mantras! . The main aim of the system is to do short, focused bursts of cleaning fairly consistently, leaving us time to do far more interesting things instead.

Bravo for six loads of laundry Hazel! Sorry to hear about the hamster delay! If I may offer a tip: those mega cages with tunnels like spaghetti junction look very tempting, and indeed I was suckered in to buying one, but believe me they are an absolute pain to clean properly! I'm always keen to give our animals "environmental richness" and don't mind going the extra mile to achieve that, but crikey our hamster used to poo and wee in all of the tunnels creating a horrible sloppy mess in them. (Don't know if all hamsters do this but friends of ours who had had them seemed surprised he did this). Anyway, I remember taking hours having to take all the tubes apart - which was an absolute pain - to clean them daily and I came to absolutely dread it! Also, I think it's important to get a very well ventilated cage as some of the plastic ones steam up with condensation which I don't think is healthy.

Ime, when keeping animals, there is a trade off between giving them the most spacious, enriching environment possible and being able to keep on top of the proper cleaning of it. There is a sweet spot in there somewhere!

Love the meal plan Bower! And sewing is very calming (I find anyway) in these circs! Our meal plan is all over the place ATM because dh won't stick to mine and it's not worth the fight tbh!

Really fab list yesterday Lane and very well done re: weight loss!

Arf at knickergate KT!

I agree Foxes that the best sort of socialising is the non-stressy kind with old friends who don't care about the state of your house or with whom you have to fill in the silences and, as you say, with whom you can "bumble along"! I do miss that sort of get together!

And yes, I can imagine Zoom being very draining indeed with small DC climbing the walls (literally or metaphorically!) during calls!

We'll get there re: the weight loss or "body clutter" as Flylady puts it Megiddo and everyone else who is trying to shape up! 💪

We used to have a weekly section for accountability/weighing in on this thread years back for Body Clutter as it happens! Maybe it is time to reinstate?

Must get on. It is day two of admin/home bleugh here. . I want to finish things quicker this week so I can go and do something creative in the early eves/late afternoons, but ATM it is taking too long! 🙄

Tally-ho everybody! Have a good planning day!

I have just worked out my weight in old money (stones and lbs) . Gulp. Doesn't seem so bad in kilos 🤪.

We are in the master bedroom today. It is plan and play day for the daily focus so meal planning etc and planning something nice to do.

Baby step 19 is a bit waffly today so I'd ignore here

I'll put memes up later as on phone and they don't load.

KCC what is the loveliest surprise you've ever had? (Apart from the usuals of major life stuff)

Coming off a plane to be met at arrivals by my DH. We were moving to the UK (he had gone ahead) and we had put an offer in on a house. He was able to tell me that we'd got the house.

(Discovering I was expecting ds was great too)

Oh God sorry. I have written another essay too!

X posts! Sorry missed MrFox's b'day! 🎂. Are you going to be baking Foxes?

Also wanted to say to Megiddo I am in a similar position to you work wise (although hrs have been going up recently - then down again under lockdown ) - so totally "get" the sideways looks- even worse with just one child!

Please please please you must NOT feel like a fraud! You are doing a vital job for your family - responding to needs as each arise - and putting others before yourself. Call me old fashioned but despite what is debated on other threads, keeping a family rolling along and having time to support extended family, is VERY important work imho, as is working to earn money for your family - and it very often goes unrewarded /unacknowledged ! Loads of us on here (TooStressy for example who is mega-organised) often say they find life admin time-consuming , and housework seems never-ending to me anyway! So hold your head up high and feel proud of everything you do!

The only thing I would say - not specifically to you Meg but in general, depending on size of family of course and their specific needs - as someone who found it difficult to work over here when dd was small (you need three langs to work behind a cash till, school hols add up to 19 weeks a year with Wed afternoons off and taxes so high that it's difficult to make money freelance as you have to work all hours to make a profit - on my hourly rate anyway (although I did do this before dd came along), dh in a job which has notoriously long hours, where he is constantly on call even on days off and on holidays, and some notable times when couriers/colleagues have arrived in the middle of the night!) and is constantly travelling (in normal times) without much or any advance notice, is ...by the time your DC are teens I would recommend expanding one's own work/interests/life because (just my experience and that of my friends) they don't really notice or appreciate the work or focus you put in by that stage and that's the point at which you start resenting it. And negotiating the spikey teen years is much easier when you have your own focus as then you can step back from family life a bit and you don't take it so personally when they look up and assess you rather brutally, through near-adult eyes, and realise you are just a normal failing human, like everyone else - or not as good as everyone else's parents!

On the other hand ...this could be a load of bunkum as the friends I have who work outside of the home, say their teens are angry with them too!

Ach, ignore me, you can't win!

Sorry I must stop rambling and do some filing/archiving ... .

Stagger (run) /walk for 20 minutes with ds for company. He was very supportive bless him.

I'd just like to back up what SC said meggido. DH has international travel and is a workaholic - we moved for his job. He gives me all the time I need if I want to research history or write and is really really supportive. But despite the fact that we have the same qualifications he's been way more successful career wise. There just aren't career openings for me in this very small city as well as for him and to be honest we are lucky one of us got a post. So I work part-time in a workplace job and do the school run and after school bit. Home education is a (valuable) job as is all the other associated house/kid stuff. I read a work- life balance book which said that all things that are not your own free time are to be classed effectively as work. So don't feel a fraud.

I do feel a bit wistful about the sparkling career I might have had but I think it's partially midlife crisis talking and other family traumas over the years which have worn me down. Perhaps we don't celebrate the gains we make outside the narrow success of the workplace - it seems to be easier to quantify success on the career ladder than in mundane (so called) life itself.

Anyway with all that's going on I'm lucky to have my health and a roof over my head and food etc

I can't rile ds too much as he's in charge of my training 🤪

Well, Cagletini was sort of a surprise :o

One little surprise I’ll never forget though is from when my eldest was born. Obviously got lots of lovely presents - toys, baby clothes etc. But my nerdy college friend had gone and found my favourite Disney film ever (Donald In Mathemagic Land) on DVD. I’d never been able to find it and must have mentioned the fact I’d watched it endlessly on video as a kid (with accompanying fond memories of dad explaining the Fibonacci rules) and was really missing it. It meant the world and somewhere I think I still have the note he put with it!

Willow you are absolutely not a fraud. If everyone found housework as quick and easy as some of MN, flylady and other methods wouldn’t be a thing at all, let alone have threads and groups dedicated to following! If anyone can easily balance all the housework while spinning the plates many of us do - SN (ourselves or DC), work, caring, physical health etc - fair play to them.

Welcome didmyhouse and hello littlemiss

Am shattered today. Didn't sleep last night because there is some really hard relationship drama going on among my friends and I'm worried about them all. I'm not directly involved but it looks like one of those situations where everyone has been stupid in their own way, and everybody is hurt. I keep trying to think of something to say to help but I cant. I know I have to leave them to it and figure things out but its really horrible.

Anyway, so no sleep and then supermarket shop this morning. And then the power turned off afterwards and we suspect it might be the washing machine. We just had the place rewired so this was really frustrating. Power is back on now though.

So I'm a bit sad and shattered now. But things that are cheering me up are:
❤ my aunt sent a package of art activities and supplies for DD
❤ we are going to watch the Chelsea flower show today
❤ I've bought some gifts for a friend whose just had a baby girl
❤ the above discussion about work/life/housework balance is refreashingly balanced and non judgey for mumsnet 😁 I love these supportive threads