How do I compromise with DH?

[Fanciedachange1]

I’m just looking for any advice from anyone in a similar situation to myself. I like our home to be tidy, clean and “guest ready”. I find it easier to relax in a nice clean environment.

DH on the other hand is more “practical”. He likes things to be easily accessible rather than tidied away and believes a house should be lived in. I think he genuinely doesn’t notice clutter or mess in the same way I do.

The majority of the housework is done my me, and that isn’t an issue as I work less hours and I get satisfaction from the look of the house after a good tidy.

For me, when we sold our last home I really enjoyed that few months of keeping the house pristine incase there was a viewing and I was the one showing viewers around and it made me feel quite proud. DH on the other hand wasn’t so keen about having to constantly remember to clean up after himself and me generally fussing about it looking nice.

What does everyone else do in this situation?

Buy a nice storage box with a lid tell him he can keep his crap in that lol looks tidy but easily accessible

Yes, this sounds like it's a bit case by case. What does he want to easily access? If it's his every possession laid out on every surface then that's one thing, if you are putting his slippers in the a box in the cupboard every time he takes them off it's another!

Gosh are you my OH? He wants us to live in a hotel....why can't we have things about - why can't a pen be on the side? I'm with your OH - you have to live...and he wants to be able to relax. Why not compromise that you can have an immaculate bedroom - but the living room and kitchen need to be a bit more lived in.

Thanks for the replies!

It’s not as bad as me following him around cleaning up after him, but more like when I tidy I put things away and then he can’t find them even though they go in the same place.

When i tidy the bedroom I tend to just put all his “stuff” in a pile for him to sort but then I know that pile will still be there until I tidy again. If I then try and put it away you can guarantee he will need an item from it and he was purposely leaving that out so he knew where it was!

None of this matters though. It’s all nothing in the big scheme of things and I am pretty happy that this is the worst thing I have to moan about! I guess I am just more intrigued how other couples manage when they don’t have the same outlook as each other. Of all the gorgeous houses I have seen it seems to be both partners equally obsessive so it is easy to maintain on a day to day basis.

Go and have a look at the ClutterBug YouTube channel. She has a good series of posts on 'types' of people, which boil down to basically 'do you like things on display' or 'do you like things hidden away', and a couple of subcategories. Then I remember there are some videos or possibly podcasts on how the two different types of people can live together, and tips on organising for different styles of people.