How old are your DC and what do they do to help?

[TheDogsKnees]

There are five of us in a two bedroom terraced house. We have decided to stay for 2-3 years to save for a deposit for a bigger place but I am overwhelmed by the housework. DD's are 10, 8 and 3. I try to encourage them (the older two in particular) to tidy up after themselves but I also want them to learn some responsibility and understand that things don't get done by magic! I occasionally get them to help with folding/pairing underwear but what other jobs are age appropriate and won't have me redoing them after they've finished?!

I have DD 11 and DS 9

They both have been folding/putting all their own laundry away for a few years, but since we moved and they have their own bedrooms they do their own laundry start to finish all I do is remind them)

It’s their job to put the bins out since we moved here in summer

They started doing washing up this month too, maybe every two or three days. I don’t give them sharp stuff though due to clumsiness. Both are autistic and struggle with that sort of thing

They also do other stuff to help out when asked, hoovering, sweeping, taking recycling out that sort of thing, and are very helpful with baby sister

I was so shamed when I went to uni. My mother had done everything for us at home. So I had no habits of making my bed, cleaning the loo etc etc.
I was not a nice housemate.

So, I was determined that my 3 would be competent asap.

So, from the time they were small, they've "helped".
TBH, when they first tried, it was more work for me.
But, I've always taken the approach that this is their chance to get it wrong while they learn to get it right.

Mine are now 14, 13 and 11.
They empty bins, look after pets independently, hoover, can help with all stages of the laundry; except ironing I am an ironing freak.
Older 2 can make dinner - maybe once a fortnight?

I think they're fab as they will do pretty much anything I ask.... still working on them seeing what needs to be done

Yes, you have to just accept that there will be a time where it is more work than just doing it yourself, especially if they have SN. For example by the time I’ve set up the washing up and reminded them how to do it, removed unsafe stuff etc I probably could have done it all.

But think of it as investing the time, to make sure they are self sufficient young adults in future. My DSD was shocked by similar people at uni, who had had their parents do everything and some of her housemates couldn’t do basic cooking or use the washing machine etc.

And if they don’t do a perfect job, it’s ok and best not to criticise, just encourage further next time.

I am far from perfect myself, I’m autistic and struggle hugely as I never learned this stuff as a child, so we are all trying to learn together.

DSs are 6 and 2. They ‘help’ sort laundry when clean, put their laundry in the laundry bin (when reminded), clear their plates into the kitchen after a meal, and will ‘help’ lay the table and change beds if cajoled.

Yes, you have to just accept that there will be a time where it is more work than just doing it yourself, especially if they have SN. For example by the time I’ve set up the washing up and reminded them how to do it, removed unsafe stuff etc I probably could have done it all.

But think of it as investing the time, to make sure they are self sufficient young adults in future. My DSD was shocked by similar people at uni, who had had their parents do everything and some of her housemates couldn’t do basic cooking or use the washing machine etc.

And if they don’t do a perfect job, it’s ok and best not to criticise, just encourage further next time.

I am far from perfect myself, I’m autistic and struggle hugely as I never learned this stuff as a child, so we are all trying to learn together.

Sorry for double post my phone went silly

From about 10 dd has unloaded the dishwasher and fold and put all laundry away when it comes out of the dryer