Arguing about tidy/ cleaning

[lovemyboys25]

I need some advice the main things me & DH argue about is the house

He wants pristine tidiness constantly & I just can't manage it.

How do you solve this?
How do you share out tasks?

I am a lot better than I used to be, when I get low mood I struggle even more because I never know where to start!

I would like a tidy house too not just hubby. Even growing up I was untidy & mum constantly tidying my room & ashamedly during hard emotional times my mum has come to help before I was married when house was overwhelming.

Do you both do the housework or does it mainly fall to you? If it's mainly you doing it and he's demanding a higher standard, he needs to crack on with it himself.

He does help but is currently unwell so it's more difficult
He does help

I just wondered if anyone has methods on splitting tasks

Play to your strengths - if one of you is a better cook or enjoys sorting out the laundry, etc then that person does it. If he's a tidier then he tidies and dusts and you follow, chucking out the rubbish and hoovering.

ashamedly during hard emotional times my mum has come to help before I was married when house was overwhelming

Nothing shameful about getting help.

What is it you struggle with? The actual cleaning, or the putting away, or the mindset?

I like:

Don't put it down, put it away.

Take it immediately to the place where you'll look for it first.

Always do anything that takes a minute or less.

Have a basket for "things": paper, stuff to go upstairs, one for each DC. Looks tidier in a basket!

Chuck out stuff that is useless - challenge yourself to throw away 5 things per day. Less stuff = less stuff to tidy.

For splitting chores e.g. cleaning, cooking, shopping, laundry, write down ALL the tasks you can think of. Get your DH to write down ALL the tasks he can think of. Go through the list together and allocate jobs and agree some daily "tasks" e.g. wipe the sinks, sweep the floor, load & unload the dishwasher etc.

Wait- he "helps"? And he wants it pristine? Well, sounds like he needs to be chief of housekeeping, and you can "help"!!!!