Yes it makes me feel miserable, embarassed and useless. I've always been messy but I think it was manageable when I was living in a shared house or a small flat, or maybe because I was moving a lot when I was single so had to fit all my things into a car, I don't know.. For the last 20 years it's been getting worse and worse, and then babies, PND, work, exhaustion, etc, etc have meant that my house is just an utter tip.
I never feel relaxed indoors because it's just not a nice space to spend time, things are always missing, I'm always behind with everything, can't find things or just feel stressed by looking at the overwhelming mess. I try to avoid friends calling round, never invite neighbours in because I'm too embarrassed.
I know some people can live with it - my sister is messy but she doesn't seem to be stressed by it very much, so maybe it's a personality thing how much it affects you.
I'm always hoping that the next decluttering guru will be the one to change my life but I feel like I'd need a month off work to even get started. I actually quite enjoy clearing stuff out at work and even found it quite satisfying clearing out my in-laws house, so I think it's partly the emotional thing with my own stuff of not knowing what to keep and making the decision to part with stuff that reminds me of things or people. I think it's a vicious circle - it depresses and overwhelms me so I can't face doing it, it gets worse and makes me feel depressed and overwhelmed.
I hope someone will post that they're an ex-hoarder and know the secret to becoming clutter-free and organised - though I suggest you write a best-selling book if this is you :)