If you are very tidy to the point of being minimalist - how do you do it?

[drspouse]

We are probably getting our house ready to sell and it really, really needs a complete declutter (we do have too much stuff) and needs us to keep it tidy (many of our things do have a place to go but never get put back there!) but also I feel like there are a lot of things that I cannot actually think what we could do with them.

So for example:
Our bedroom is not too bad. I need to keep an eye on the top of our dresser (random stuff out of DH's pockets) and my own bedside table (discarding one book and starting another) but I've recently cleared ALL the junk off the window sill. Our wardrobe is very full (we share one) and it has irritating open shelves beside and on top (so you can always see badly folded clothes) but we could actually get doors installed, and I could slim down my wardrobe, and it would be a place of peace and harmony.

But our hallway for example - we have a hat rack, a standing coat rack, a wall coat rack, a DC/DH shoe rack, a DC standing coat rack, and some quite nice looking boxes on a high shelf and it is still rammed full to the point where we cannot hang up guests' coats and our coats fall off the racks.

And another difficult point is our big living room which is also a play room. We gave away about 75% of our books and 50% of our CDs a few years ago but they always seem to be overflowing the shelves. I usually give a book to the charity shop as soon as I've read it. There are also boxes of photos, maps etc. on the shelves and they just look a mess.

We have a consistent type of toy storage (stackable wooden boxes that we only stack 2 high) and the DCs are pretty good at putting back their Lego, but puzzles etc. don't fit in the boxes so stick out, the DCs have a bookshelf but everything is always falling off, and there are an awful lot of things that just don't seem to have an "away" to go to, e.g. we have some Fisher Price Little People houses/barns that won't fit in boxes, a couple of ride on toys etc.

And the kitchen - not only are there loads of jars etc. lining up on the worktops, food processor and biscuit barrel on top of the microwave, but the tops of all the cupboards always seem to be full of spare food, big bag of rice, boxes of cereal, picnic cooler etc. etc.

It's doing my head in! And of course it looks bad for potential viewers.

So for the meantime we could easily get a storage facility and put loads of the kids toys in there - but coats for example - I feel like we wear all of them! And they just look messy all hung up.

Maybe you have too much out of season stuff? Ie most our stuff is used all year around apart from winter coat/ summer hat, so barely anything to pack away.

Why not set up the tiny spare room as a wardrobe/ dressing room for you and DH, and have the study/ library/ play room double as a spare room?

We intend to rent some storage space before we put our house on the market. We're seriously upsizing, so intend to keep a lot of stuff that we like and use, but not all the time, but don't have anywhere out of sight to store. Things like ds1's old clothes that we've kept for ds2 or, by the time we get around to it, heAvy outdoor wear, snowboots etc. Games, toys and puzzles that go through phases of getting used and not, kitchen stuff that I use, but can live without, for a while, and so on.

But yes, we're decluttering some things permanently, too. I'll never use the slightly wonky tripod that my brother gave me and the computer keyboard that went a bit manky at the back of a cupboard got thrown out with it. I have a pile of spare bedding and towels waiting for a suitable charity bag and things like the jeans that look great on me but have studs that give me a rash will be taken straight to a charity shop after their next wash, along with various other items that are not quite right.

We have hobbies and more than one coat each also That really made me laugh.

Op, you have too much stuff. You have a 4 bedroom house and only 4 people but you can't put your porridge oats away. That means there is too much stuff.

I really recommend Mariekondo. I am naturally messy and a bit horderish (mainly due to tightness rather than sentimental reasons) and I now have a 'lived in' home that doesn't have piles of shit everywhere. It's not brilliant or minimalist but if you called around unexpectedly I wouldn't be worrying about the mess. The clothes folding allows you to get a phenomenal among in drawers which makes a huge difference. I had bin liners full of stuff I was convinced I needed and I didn't need it, I just kept it because it was 'perfectly ok'. I also found I had loads of duplicates I didn't know I had. I remember on a Kondo Facebook group someone posted a picture of all their notebooks and there was about 40. Lots of people are like this. I had 3 potato mashers. I haven't mashed a potato since Blair was in No 10.

Spare bedding and towels was also something we had absolutely loads of. The dcs all had about 4 bedding sets each and I had piles of swimming towels that double up as beach towels and camping towels but it was ridiculous. Things like that take up loads of space

I think foe someone like you, the only way is to rent or borrow some storage space. Imagine you are temporarily moving into a caravan for 2 months. Put anything you will not need for the next 8 weeks, or cannot fit into the caravan, into large boxes and store it in the temporary storage facility.

How many cooking pans, toys, summer clothes, books, ornaments, shoes boots can you fit into the caravan. The space created can store the things you are going need. If you are hoping to move then these things will need to be packed away. So you are creating space, helping your house to sell and getting ahead with the packing.

Ermmm I do know we have too much stuff... I have never said we haven't!

And yes we are renting storage space (babysitter booked to look after the DCs for this Sat, van will be rented in the morning and DH is sorting the storage space).

But while I could live for 2 months with 2 pans and one frying pan... I just don't think I could live long term like that. So that's one cupboard the same size as our oven, filled with pans. 3 regular pans, 2 small nonstick, and 3 frying pans (one quite small).

We often have 4 extra people round. So that's 8 dinner plates and 8 bowls. None of my neighbours have ever asked us to borrow any so I assume they have about the same number! And the fact that they haven't asked suggests to me they would find it weird if we did.
We use 8 side plates ourselves during the day, easily. DH has 3 extra bowls that he particular likes but that's just 3 bowls. We have one potato masher that we use regularly. 4 sharp knives that are all in the dishwasher by the time it's full. Food processor, hand beater - both used a lot. Microwave, kettle, toaster - the usual stuff.
A shelf full of mugs (often all of which are dirty) on which 1 packet of coffee and 2 boxes of tea will also fit - meaning any spare coffee ends up on the top of the cupboard. Special offers (and addiction to coffee) means we'd never wait till we'd run out to buy another packet. And so it goes on.

Thinking about it, it seems like most people we know have some kind of utility/storage additional to their kitchen (e.g. my friend who is single, no kids, and has a 3 bed house keeps her spare food in her utility, though she has a much bigger kitchen including an island with cupboards).

Or else their kitchen looks like ours with boxes of Weetabix/oats on top of the cupboards!

Do you need to stock so much tea/ rice/ oats or whatever? Do you like in a very rural area? We would only have oats in use and maybe one extra maximum.

See I think 3 frying pans alone is excessive, when do you use all at once? Just one pan, two if drastically different sizes work for majority. 3 regular pans and 2 non stick, can't you just use non stick for everything? Keep two non stick, and one extra. You only have 4 hobs to cook on so 5 pans, 3 frying pans etc are never going to all be used at once

I think you seem to just have lots of every category. Marie kondo would say keep what you treasure. So for one family that might be cooking equipment, but less coats. Another hiking books but less baking. Another lots of toys, but little outdoor equipment. But you seem to have lots of everything maybe

We have 1 jar of oats and the rest of the bag on top of the cupboard. Is that more or less what you mean Art? Maybe I'm just being intolerant of what everyone else thinks is normal i.e. storing packets that aren't empty, in plain sight. All the other half empty packets go in our lovely pull out cupboard - it's just that the bags of oats and rice, and the big cereal packets, are too big, and the coffee too numerous (OK I'll admit we may benefit from cutting down on our coffee habit!).

So apart from the people who store them in a utility/outside - where do people keep spare/large food packets?

I often use 2 frying pans at once. The non stick pans are tiny and won't go in the dishwasher, but are very good for milk/baked beans etc. I use them all a lot - I like cooking. We also frequently use all 3 regular pans at the same time e.g. one for pasta, one for veg and one for the sauce to make a pasta dish.

Ermmm I do know we have too much stuff... I have never said we haven't!

Sorry. I've re-read and I know you've said it several times. I think I blocked it out because you have so many posts explaining why you need all the stuff you have and it sort of made it sound like you don't know you have too much stuff.

Any way you could have an open shelf for pans, or hang them somewhere to free up an oat cupboard? I'd rather have pans on 'display' than oats.

Your kitchen sounds horribly cluttered. Is it a really tiny kitchen? I hate having clutter on the work surface when I am cooking. The only things that stay out are my food processor, microwave and kettle. Everything else goes in cupboards. Although, we did move from a house with a larger kitchen with more storage space, so I admit that I have some rarely used kitchen stuff in the loft.

You really do need to get as much off the work surface as possible. Nothing tells potential buyers that there isn't enough storage more than an untidy cluttered kitchen.

I'd rather have pans on 'display' than oats
I think I would too but the free space is on top of cupboards which is of course not ideal for pans!

Iamastonished
Where do you keep your toaster? Wooden spoons for stirring things on the stove?

We do also have out, which perhaps we don't need, bread bin (large vintage one which wouldn't fit in any cupboard!), coffee maker (DH's baby but I am thinking he may be persuaded he doesn't need it), and oil bottles next to the stove, and 2 jars of muesli (nice glass jars)

Then we have stuff out that I really know we don't need out but either it's easier than getting them out every 5 minutes OR we don't have a place for them: slow cooker, some smaller jars of food, box of cereal that we use every day, biscuit barrel and DH's separate stash of chocolate biscuits that is hidden behind the muesli and the DC don't have access to.

I would actually be happy putting away quite a bit of this (except the toaster - I definitely use that more than any of the food processor, slow cooker, or coffee maker. Or indeed microwave), if we had somewhere to put it.

It's not that small a kitchen but comparing to friends, we probably have just as much stuff as most of them, and as much of it is on display except for friends who have either a really big kitchen OR have a utility.

You really do need to get as much off the work surface as possible.

I agree and will bear this in mind when we are storing stuff.
As I say we can live with 3 pans for 2 months but not permanently!

I sympathize op. I have a flat with a small kitchen.

But I love this sort of thread, they have helped me a lot so.

In my kitchen I have 3.5 above counter shallow cupboards. So 210cm. Each with two shelves, three including the base. And 4.5 base units so 270cm base units which are deeper. One is all drawers with is cutlery, crockery, all of my pans, except the cast iron one which lives on the hob. I don't have a microwave, just kettle and toaster out. I have loads of stuff for serving, parties, Christmas etc in my kitchen, and a whole shelf of different teas.

Is your kitchen just badly designed? I only buy one breakfast cereal (oats) my dh buys a bright red box one once a week, when it's gone it's gone and then it's porridge, or if they're lucky unbaked flapjack mix.
It sounds like you actually have a lot more space than I do.

We have hooks over all our bedroom and bathroom doors for weekly and daily things respectively. Coats and swimming bags go on these.

When you go to bed do you know what you will be doing the next morning for example if you know you will be cycling to work? Get your clothes ready the night before and put them where you get dressed, put the right coat and shoes out too, you don't have to put them on but take it when you leave your dressing space.

I think with children of two and doc you are swimming against the tide, but when you get your own things sorted it gets easier.

Get rid of the stuff you don't like or need in order to treasure what you do want.

Ah, the difference between you and me, OP, is I only replace stuff just before or once it has actually run out. I can't bear having too much stuff, even if it's useful, in the house. I get joy from getting rid of stuff and live by, "If in doubt, chuck it out". I've always got a mental snapshot of things we have that we have plenty of space for, but aren't being used much, at the back of my mind, and spend ages working out how to get rid of tricky items, as a non-driver. I used to be very tidy, but had way too much stuff, albeit stored very neatly. My XH had hoarding tendencies and when we split up, it gave me the impetus to declutter. That was nearly 5 years ago, and I'm still on a decluttering journey.

In your case, get rid of as much as you can that you're not attached to and don't buy kitchen food and equipment until you've run out.

I would give you an award for being the most tiresome, defeatist OP in the world but not sure you'd have anywhere to store it

I'd really recommend reading Kondo. I tried it by following advice online, but actually reading the book was much better.

It makes you evaluate why you keep stuff and how much of each type you have. For example you mentioned getting a hand down of a bag full of vests - where have you stored them, did you keep them all or just the number of vests you need for your DC? Did you keep them because you'd feel bad about passing them on or not using them? How long did you keep them for?

For your coffee example - you keep loads. It why? How many days of supplies have you got? If it's more than a few weeks, why? You can buy more and top up when it's neceesary. You can arrange online shops for top ups if you're worried about going down.

My own food storage habits have really changed. I don't have multiple boxes of cereals - we have one or two boxes on the go. I buy more when it's close to running out. I might be spending a bit more money by not bulk buying loads - but I feel much better at home because I'm enjoying the space I have rather than it being cluttered.

The toaster lives in the cupboard as it only gets used once a day. I forgot that I do have a utensil holder on the work surface, but that was only a recent thing. My drawers are too shallow and I got fed up with rummaging around for spoons and spatulas.

Honestly, your kitchen would drive me bonkers. I keep all food in cupoards or the fridge, unless I have baked a cake, and that would stay in the cake carrier on the work surface until it was all eaten.

I have quite a small kitchen and not a lot of worktop space so I try to keep it tidy and clutter free. Even frequently used stuff like teabags, oils, bread etc get put into cupboards. It's not difficult.

Oh I couldn't be doing with having massive bags of stuff out on the kitchen surfaces. I'm pretty untidy but I don't stock up on food etc or buy in bulk. Only things out on the work surfaces are kettle, toaster, microwave - no food of any description, or jars of coffee etc.

I've got a fairly big kitchen so I try and spread things so there's very limited stacking - the quickest way to mess everywhere is to have to get stuff all the way out to get what you want - because either the extras don't go back or the thing you wanted doesn't because it's too much faff to get the extras out, put the thing that was used back and then reload. So the shelf step thingies are great - so you get 2 different things in the same space without needing to take the top one off when you want the bottom one. You should also be able to vary your cupboard shelf heights to suit you.

My current disaster is the combined tupperware and pan cupboard - mostly the tupperware end as I have a system for the pans!

Kondo style folding was too good for my cheapie chest of drawers - my tops drawer collapsed under the weight of clothing in there!

Your coming up with a lot of reasons why not too......maybe think of reasons why you should, that should help. If you want to live less clutters then do it. It's easy for me because that's just the way I live naturally. I do appreciate though that if I had too live cluttered it would properly kill me and I couldn't handle it, so I imagine to change is hard no matter what, but to keep saying reasons why you can't do it won't help you if you want to do it.

We have one coat each on a rack, the coat we wear the most in the week and that's it,the others are upstairs in our wardrobes....we bring them down when we come down the stairs from getting dressed in the morning if a different coat is needed. At the end of the day the coat is swapped out or returned back to the wardrobe.

Toys are kept in their rooms, that is why the have a whole room. We have an ottoman downstairs in the living room that is filled with toys. They can put what ever toys they want in there as long as the lid can close. Toys are returned back into the ottoman everyday before dinner and again before bedtime.

Just seen you have a four bedroom house, it sounds like you just live cluttered, it will be hard to just change like that and it will take time, but you will never go back, it's just a lot easier to live with a bit of space in your home, and who doesn't want to live easy?

Our gloves go in our coat pockets and the scarf and hat are shoved down the sleeve, everything is together then, we do t have a separate box for hats and gloves that we use daily.

I would love to come to your home and help, I just love doing things like that....I'm aware I'm the strange one here

It's a lot clearer if you read the book, do that first.