Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Housekeeping

Find cleaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Housekeeping forum.

Original poster

What are your thoughts on having a cleaner?

51 replies

mads1 · 23/02/2007 11:32

I have had a cleaner since dd was born (22 months ago). Until I had dd I always cleaned my house top to bottom and I feel it was always spotless. I was even cleaning windows and power washing my driveway when I was 1 week overdue.

However, I started having a cleaner cos i had a c sec and I do suffer from slight back problems.

I do however feel less of a SAHM because of this. I feel i should be cooking, cleaning, playing etc... I literally feel guilty for not cleaning my own house. I do keep it tidy and obviously clean up after play, cooking, baths etc. But when I hear other Mums saying that they clean on such and such a day and vacuum every day etc I feel embarrassed.

does anyone else feel guilty?

OP posts:
SherlockLGJ · 23/02/2007 11:33

NO

bossykate · 23/02/2007 11:35

sweetie, if i could be a sahm and have a cleaner and whatever other help i could afford i would revel in it and not feel a moment's guilt. you can still do plenty of cooking and playing! enjoy

SherlockLGJ · 23/02/2007 11:35

Is that clear enough ??

Even when I did not have a child and I did not work, I had a cleaner and an ironing lady, if you can afford it, do it.

Life is too short.

SherlockLGJ · 23/02/2007 11:36

Oh and did I mention the dog walker ??

KathyMCMLXXII · 23/02/2007 11:36

Not a bit.
I find cleaning boring enough to be quite happy to pay someone else £7 an hour to do 2 hours of it a week for me, and I see no need to justify that.

littlelapin · 23/02/2007 11:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PinkTulips · 23/02/2007 11:37

i want one

i'm allergic to cleaning and i don't asee how ignoring my toddler and baby to scrub the house is being a better mom to them!

my own personal solution is to clean as little as possible without allowing the house to become too hazardous to human habitation.... it's a fine line but after 2 years i think i've mastered it

DimpledThighs · 23/02/2007 11:38

cleaning is BORING

if you can affrod a cleaner have one and please do not feel guilty about it. You are paying so you can have more time to do the things you want to do and NOT CLEAN.

I do not have a cleaner and my house is a state because I never do it because I HATE CLEANING!

Original poster
mads1 · 23/02/2007 17:15

Thank you. It's reassuring to read your comments. I guess we all feel we could be doing more no matter what we are doing. I know that spending the extra time with my dd is obviously much more important - and that's what it's all about.

I also need to stop comparing myself with others eg my SIL - she has 3 kids and is always busy with them plus gets a chance to tidy (kind of!!).

Thank you!

OP posts:
TinyGang · 23/02/2007 17:20

No. DONT FEEL GUILTY!

Mind you, when I had one (don't anymore) I must admit there were some people I didn't tell. None of their business was one reason, but also I knew they'd be jugemental.

I now have an ironing lady instead. I don't feel guilty because the ironing was becoming ridiculous. Again, I tend to keep it to myself though (apart from telling the www!)

pelvicflawed · 23/02/2007 17:28

Always thought they were for the rich and my MIL then a leaflet came through my door the other day advertsiing a local cleanining service and I'm seriously tempted to have one just a couple of hours a week to do the jobs I hate (cleaning the kitchen and bathroom to start) I'm going back to work pt soon and don't want to spend the days off doing housework all day so that I can spend time with lo (I'm quite fussy about the house in a scruffy kind of way). If I have one a few hours there will still be plenty to do/share with DP so its not like I won't being housework/cleaning at all. If we can find the money then yep I'll go for it!!!

doormat · 23/02/2007 17:29

you are all bloody lazy

trying to lighten the mood
lol

hermykne · 23/02/2007 17:29

i would happily have one but then would she or he do as good as me

Piffle · 23/02/2007 17:30

I am desirous of one
If dp takes a job working away he has said I can have one...
I am a decent housekeeper but there are some jobs I let slip...

Tortington · 23/02/2007 17:33

how does tax and stuff work?

i ask beuase my nan is very ill and has refused social services support, my aunty is primary carer - has mortgage and full time job - and i lobbied to keep nan at her own home rather than nursing care - anyway. as i am 300 miles away i feel the only positive contribution i can make is to get her a cleaner. help my aunty.

but was a bit worried about tax and NI and stuff. - i just want someone for 3 hours a week at £7 ph - is that reasonable ( not had this discussion in real life just off mi head)

3andnomore · 23/02/2007 17:37

OH, I so wish I could afford a cleaner...but, doubt that will ever happen...well...o.k. maybe if dh and I both are working fulltime one day...maybe then I will be able to afford it
I am a crap housewife, although, funny enough I have actually become better then I ever was, not brill, but definately better Weird...I mean, I have more Kids then I ever had,lol...but then, before Kids I was either working outside my home or out or asleep...somehow, I always still found plenty off time to mess my place up, never found the time to clean it (well...not never...but...ykwim)
Mads, stop feeling guilty, being a sahm is not about housework, it's about spending time with teh Kids 9whilest trying to fit plenty of mn time in)

KathyMCMLXXII · 23/02/2007 17:39

Cost depends where you are - £7 is going rate here in E Yorks.
Ours is self-employed so we don't have to worry abt tax.
Agencies cost more and you may not always get the same person.

3andnomore · 23/02/2007 17:41

OH, had, in the past had a cleaner, whilest we were living in Cyprus, and there was still the turkish/greek devide...currancy worked much in our favour, and cleaners were cheap, but the money they earned was so muhc more worth on their side of teh Island (I know not a ethical point of view of course) , and dh always took the piss, cos I never did as much cleaning and tidying as I did then...as I always did clean before she came ,I would have beeen to embaressed otherwise....(rofl at mysefl...)

Tortington · 23/02/2007 17:42

self employed though? isn;t it my duty to check on these things
or get them to sign something saying they are self employed?

last thing i need is the inland revenue and benefits agency down my neck - ending up in court fro fraud never being able to get a mortgage... you laugh ! but i swear shit like this happens to me

so is there a pro forma letter the cleaner would sign? would a typed up declaration be enough? are my duties as an employer more than this?

3andnomore · 23/02/2007 17:48

As far as I am aware it is the self employed persons to declare themselfs, not your responsibity.

KathyMCMLXXII · 23/02/2007 17:52

I'm pretty sure it's up to them. We certainly haven't asked ours to sign anything.
Our has an accountant who comes to her twice a year to sort her tax out.

tassis · 23/02/2007 18:03

I'm a SAHM and I'd love a cleaner.

Go for it!

ScummyMummy · 23/02/2007 18:17

Have a look here, re tax etc, custardo.
Good luck with your cleaner, mads.

bobsyouruncle · 23/02/2007 18:23

Don't feel guilty, you'll never look back on your life & say "Oh I wish I'd done more cleaning!?"

Original poster
mads1 · 23/02/2007 19:08

Custardo - Our cleaner is self employed and we pay cash in hand - never really thought about the consequences from our side. I guess the cleaner is responsible for her own taxes etc.

Thank you again to all. You have all really helped ease my guilt. I think I will still keep it low key however!

The one line that will stick in my mind is... "you'll never look back on your life & say "Oh I wish I'd done more cleaning!?". Thanks for that bobsyouruncle.

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread