Epic housekeeping fail.

[oliviaaah]

Well there I was, changing the bedding when I noticed a bulky bit in the corner of the duvet cover. In I went and extracted a muslin square. Fair enough you might say, except my DS is 12 and a half years old.....

It must have been in there for at least ten years!

So come on, cheer me up and tell me your housekeeping fails.

Oh my god. I can't beat that. So funny.

I must confess to holding onto some relics from school - I'm 37

Mine is so embarrassing, dp's cousin was coming round one night and I was being a complete lazy cow and couldn't be bothered to do the dishes - there was loads! So when I found out off dp (he'd was at work) that he was picking his cousin up on his way from work I quickly gathered up the dishes and put them on the ironing board and stuck a sheet over them thinking we'll not go in the dining room despite there it not having a door. I thought I was home dry by the time I went to bed until I heard the familiar clinking of dishes.
Dp had told him he could stay over so he was looking for a blanket and came across my stash. Every time I see him now I think about how he knows all about my dirty secret!

Sorry for typos

I once forgot to tell my DH that his friend who had previously flirted outrageously with me had phoned to say he was coming round the following day. I totally forgot he was coming too and my DH went out. Up the path walks the friend.
To my horror I stupidly said "oh DH is out but I'm around of you want to stay" (and somehow sounded as if I had planned the whole thing so as to be alone with the friend). I had been attempting housework including a load of washing which was now dispersed around the house drying out flung over chairs
As I led the friend through the house (to the marginally less messy garden) I spotted a grey sports bra drying over the back of a chair. In my shame I just found myself saying "let's go through to the garden, but I'll just remove my underwear first".
He gave my a raised eye brows look as the penny dropped with what I had said. The SHAME.

Love it Brightred! You've made me think of another one. I was walking through the park and a man had one of those long rubber ball-holder things you use for throwing a ball for a dog. Well I 'd never seen one before and I heard myself saying 'What a fabulous piece of equipment you've got there'. The double-entendre hit me as I strolled nonchalantly on my way, dying a little inside...

That is brilliant! Can't believe it went unnoticed for 10 years

that is one of the funniest OPs I have read in a while.