Mess everywhere :(

[Ekkwhine]

I'm the first to admit I'm not the tidiest of people but after a bad year (lost a family member, difficult pregnancy, problems with my toddler) it's gotten way out of hand-for expletive everything got chucked in my bedroom last time I had a panicked clean up and I've been sleeping on the sofa. The kids rooms are brilliant I tidied, decluttered, cleaned and organised and am keeping on top of those fine, but everywhere else is just crammed. I've got a van for tomorrow afternoon so I want to get as much clutter/crap out as possible to do a tip run.
My cupboards and drawers are all crammed with a mixture of things, I'm drowning in washing, there's not a surface not littered in clutter and I need a plan of action as I just don't know where to start.
My plan is to be ruthless, empty the drawers and cupboards and allocate. Any tips would be greatly appreciated, I'm on my own with this with dd6, ds2 and a three month old.
I'm off to start bagging the laundry into clear sacks, darks, lights and whites so that it's easier to plough through the laundry and hopefully when I return someone will have come along with some hints, tips, tricks or motivation lol
Tia

Is there anything that could be put outside with sheets over (in case of rain) to give you some space to de-clutter? Can you get a friend over to help? Sounds like you know what you need to do, just need more time and space. All the best. Put a choccy egg and a bottle of wine in the fridge as a reward.

*example not expletive lol

Thanks for replying.
That's a good idea re: putting outside. I've been wondering what to do with the items that belong in other rooms until that room's done, bagging, labelling and popping in the she'd would work. Also the pram chassis, clothes airers etc could all temporarily go out, I'm going to suck it up and use the tumble to get through the laundry.
Unless something's super nice of dd6's it's not getting saved for the baby. I haven't the space to store it efficiently. A binbag of 'gibble' and two bags if laundry so far lol, I've just stopped to feed. Washer and dryer both on, toddler's passed out upside down on the sofa.
Sadly the one friend I really wouldn't mind digging through my junk with me is away for a long weekend. I wish of known about this van loan earlier, I could have gotten so much more done.

Could you take all of your washing to a launderette and get it service washed? That would get the washing sorted. Then in each room maybe have a keep, chuck and maybe pile / bag. I've recently read the Marie Kondo book, which is quite short and available on the kindle that you could read tonight? She does sorting by category rather than room, which you may find easier than tackling each room? It sounds like you've had a really rough time. Have you got anyone to help you? My friend used to give her kids 5p for each item taken from the wrong to right room in a set time like a sort of race, maybe you could get your DC's involved? Good luck!

Oh and I find loading a washing basket with things from downstairs for upstairs and then vice versa is quite good for dealing quickly with clutter.

I'd do as much tonight when your kids are in bed (I know the 3 mo is probably up in the night), but you will get loads done with peace to focus. Set a bedtime too and just work ruthlessly til then.

The book in a nutshell - if something doesn't give you joy OR is useful, get rid. Be ruthless!! And build in breaks. Half hour work for 10 min sit down.

Thanks so much, I'll pop back in a bit and reply properly, if I stop now I'll not go again lol then before I know it I'll be feeding (bf so alas no wine!) and feeding little people, I'm about to chuck the two older ones in the garden and soft through the downstairs toy box

I follow the flylady system (Google if you want) and I have found her 15 minutes Decluttering at a time is really helpful. I've got a lot of sorting out done that way, although I'm not there yet. I would worry you're going to set yourself unachievable targets and so set yourself up to fail, because clearly there is a lot to get done, your on your own, and you've got your hands full with 3 children. Two immediate things spring to mind from your post, how about getting rid of the outgrown baby baby clothes and toys (I'm assuming you need to make space in your drawers and cupboards as part of your sort out) and set yourself a goal of Decluttering your bed completely so that you can sleep in it. Target date for completion Easter Sunday maybe? I'm guessing that all that stuff on your bed that has stopped you from sleeping in it for ages has just sat there and that way has proved you don't really need to have it in your home.

Fly lady us only useful once in top of stuff and for tiny little declutters in an otherwise ok house. Kondo is heavy duty and a great first step

psychologies.co.uk/self/10-tips-to-make-you-more-tidy-and-organised-now.html

Hi everyone, I'm still here, thanks so much for all of your advice, I'm taking a lot on board.

The laundry's going well. Bagging it into like for like sacks means just pulling the stuff out as it's pre-sorted and bunging it in. I also separated the actually dirty stuff and most of it's going through on a quick wash. The stuff requiring a longer wash can go on when the tumble dryer has a backlog!

I've managed to declutter enough toys to get rid of a toy box! Bonus! Unless a piece of 'art' is super-special, such as the drawing done of the family after baby was born then it's gone. The better ones get a pic taken on my phone.

The plan today is to grab the obvious stuff and get it ready for the tip. I have a box to chuck paperwork in to sort through in front of the TV one night, unless it's glaringly obvious that it needs to go. Outgrown baby clothes are going straight into an underbed box, the reason for this is that she's only just coming out of newborn and the bulk of her stuff is prem/early baby. I want to drop them in at the hospital next weekend, as they really helped out clothing wise with her unexpected arrival and struggled finding clothes small enough until I'd got someone to pick some up.

All other clothes are gone, aside from a couple of nice dresses that won't look dated in a couple of years. Typically there's no charity bags through the door this week! I'll bag them up and label them, there's charity collection bins at the tip. I need to be more ruthless though, I keep thinking "I could sell that" or "what if I need it?" When I won't, I won't get round to selling it and I haven't needed it in years! I've set a £50 limit, if it's worth that or more I'll put it on eBay tonight. If it's not listed by tomorrow then it's gone. I have no guilt about anything under that as at the tip they take useable things and put them out for others, so picturing others getting use out of my junk is helping lol!

My house is by no means at "hoarders" level, nor "how clean is your house?" It's clean, and reasonably tidy in places. However the clutter is making me anxious, and I recognise that my level of attachment to what is essentially crap could become unhealthy. I know that when it's done I'll feel so much better, and back in control.

Ok, what was meant to be a quick update has resulted in an essay and I'm now feeding so I'll go check out that last link. I'll also download Marie kondo is it? Later, as I think that will be brilliant over the upcoming week. I wish I could post some pics of the areas that I've gotten done as I'm so proud! However it would totally out me, and I'm a master of hiding my clutter when needed and many people would be shocked!!

Wow, well done Ekk, sounds like you are really getting after it. It sounds like you have got your head in the right place and are finally determined to wrestle back control of the situation.

Cheering you on from here, and hoping your attitude will rub off on me.

Our house is not too bad as we only moved in less than 2 years ago so had a massive clear out for that. But I sense we are gradually accumulating again and I must get on top of it before it runs away with itself.

Brilliant link, thanks Box I did have to chuckle at the "gather all of your clothes and put in one place" yep, that'll be in the laundry sacks then lmao!

Hi CQ I've been here almost 5 years, however I have boxes in the shed from when I moved! I'm binning them, they're gone! I've done it!

I think stems from being made redundant years back, almost everything that could be sold was to keep our heads above water. Thinking back my house was lovely and uncluttered!

I need to keep telling myself that it's a different time. Having a spare food mixer (which incidentally is useless) or a stereo from a car I owned 7 years ago isn't going to stop that happening again, nor are they a sign that we've picked ourselves up. The food in the cupboards and the bills being paid are.

I am going through the same thing regarding mess overtaking my home. We are redecorating and finding it very difficult to paint walls because of the amount of stuff that we have accumulated over the years. My husband is a boarder so that hasn't helped the situation at all, although he has realised that it will cost an absolute fortunate to hire a removal van when we eventually sell up. The garage is full of unopened boxes from when we first moved house 8 years ago so he has promised to tackle them this summer.

I have talked my dh in to disposing things first before organising the remainder, otherwise the whole house will be full of plastic storage crates.

So far I have:
Booked 2 stalls at the local baby sales & have sold a lot of nice clothes, toys and big ticket items. Got another stall booked in a few weeks time in a very affluent area, I find less less quibbling over the price.
Bagged up 6 bin bags of adult clothes & shoes for charity shop
Gone through all the concertina files & shredded/disposed of out of date paperwork (I do this when I watch tv at night, very effective use of time!)
Got the oven man to clean my oven & extractor fan

• I found it useful to divide the house into zones and allocating myself a block of time in which to tackle the room
• Give the kids a bag/box & ask them to fill it with unwanted toys/books/clothes so you can charity shop/ebay or freecycle them
• Call the local woman's shelter and ask if they want any old but good quality unbroken household items, clothes, toys & baby equipment. They usually collect as they have to keep the location of the refuge secret, it's a good way to get rid of a lot of things in one go.

Keep asking yourself 'Do I need this or is it useful' the next time you are dithering over getting rid of something.

I have three boxes left to sort now and my wardrobe which is pretty minimal already.

Be ruthless! Seriously, it's the biggest and best way to make a difference

Hi all, checking in again! D&V hit the toddler so I only got half a load to the tip, but still, what's gone is gone, even if it wasn't as much as I'd planned.

I've realised that I need to change to my entire mindset when it comes to the house. I tend to put things off as I only have time to do X, when Y and Z need doing too, so don't see the point. That needs to change. First and foremost though I need to clear out, as it will be so much easier when everything has a place.

I'm on my third binbag today, not bad considering I've been round and wiped every door handle etc with dettol and keep getting the baby up to breastfeed as she felt a little warm to me and I'm worried she's going to get this bug.

How's everyone else getting on?

Just wanted to give you a ((hug)) and wish you good luck! You can do it!

OMG I've got a bloody living room!! A lovely, fresh, bright, uncluttered living room!! I was so in the zone I even dusted what was left and mopped the floors! Granted, there's still some drawers that could be streamlined more, but I really can't describe how happy this one room has made me!

I'm just having a cuppa and enjoying it for a few more minutes then I'm going to finish the almost done dining room.

Thanks for your tips, tricks, support and general motivation everyone, it's really spurred me on, both in typing out my plan of action rather than middling through and also having someone to share my accomplishments with!

Yeeha! Well done

Great achievement, esp with DC and dealing with sickness too - well done you!

Enjoy some well deserved in your sparkly living room tonight

I have a dining table!! Bookshelves to be de-crapped and a Hoover/mop and it's done. I'm about to chuck a load of unused smellies and clean the bathroom for my well earned bath tonight!!!
Kitchen and possibly utility room tomorrow!!

Congratulations! It feels fab when you can actually sit on the sofa without having to move something off it first!

Don't bin the toiletries, donate it to your local food bank or women's refuge as they are always short on toiletries.

We have finished painting the living room and it looks so much cleaner and fresher than before. I am going to go through all the boxes, books and paperwork and declutter before putting things back where they were.

I then need to paint the ceilings before starting on the bedrooms over Easter.

I just wanted to say a massive Thankyou to you all, you all really helped me immensely

I'll be moving house in a few weeks so I'm coming over to this kondo thread I've been hearing about. I'm going to be doubly ruthless, I'm going to bin, dump (at the recycling centre, I'm not advocating fly tipping!) donate, gift and use up everything that is of no use, has no great sentimental value or is just plain bugging me!

I've really started to 'let go' and after having a good ponder I think I've finally gotten it!

My new 'slogan, so to speak is: I don't need three bread bins! Yes, I had three, plus another two large pots for bread. One was the shiney new one I bought when I moved in, one was the manky old one I had before but decided to keep, just in case. In case of what I'm unsure, as lack of a bread bin is hardly an energency! One was my nans, because, you know. a sliced loaf is THE way to remember a loved one insert eye roll emoticon one I bought because I liked the colour and the other? No idea, no recollection of buying it at all...so, they've been gifted/donated aside from one!