August fledglings fly over here - chatting and Flying will help us persevere!

[ToffeeWhirl]

Here we go again - another month for us to tackle our clutter and get on top of our housework!

If you’re struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (can't have anyone over syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (something that undermines family fun), you need Flylady.

Flylady is a system for managing housework. Starting with babysteps, it builds up into a routine which becomes second nature. In theory, once you are used to the system, you will have a tidy house you are not embarrassed by and plenty of time to get on with more interesting things.

Flylady banishes the panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. If you fall off the Flylady bandwagon, it’s no problem: you just jump back in where you are and carry on.

Don't sign up for the Flylady emails as you will be inundated! All the information you need will be linked here on this thread on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, Flylady's steps and routines will be listed here on this thread.

Flylady uses a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

1. start or repeat baby steps

1. repeat baby steps + do 15 mins a day decluttering in the current zone

1. reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

(And detailed deep cleaning in each zone for those who have made real progress).

More info here on getting started (but ignore step one!) and Flying lessons. Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings.

Try to ignore Flylady’s purple prose (hard, I know) - the underlying system is sound!

Three key points to keep in mind:

1. No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine.

1. You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.

1. It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy overnight - accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

If you are new, then trying to spend 15 mins decluttering and doing the babysteps is the most you should expect of yourself. Lots of us here like posting our ‘to do’ or ‘ta da’ lists and they can look quite scary. Don’t be put off.

If all else fails, try the power of three – just pick three things that most need doing and focus on those.

And if you have visitors coming over this afternoon and need a quick fix NOW, try Flylady's crisis clean.

We all know each other pretty well on this thread and some of us have been around for a long time, but all lurkers, oldies and newcomers are very welcome!

WhoKnows I've seen those, but often wondered if using black ink if blue ink signatures and such show through....

I sometimes have to stamp twice, but it does obliterate very well, so long as the paper isn't shiny. I just enjoy doing it too. I must admit I've never come across the shredding scissors .

Well, just tried out stamping over red and blue print. It obliterates blue fairly well, but red not at all well. Everything I stamp is normally black, so had never thought of that.

Re: shredding. We have a ton. I'm going to take it to our local confidential shredding company to get rid of in one fell swoop.

Yes I do know that I've been saying that for months now.

I have to say, if the experience of the last couple of days has taught me anything it's that I'm still miles away from the clean and tidy house I dream of.

You know, just vacuum for a couple of days and keep all surfaces clean.

Even that's not possible. And I still have bags of sodding washing

Sorry, still not caught up. Though I have been better and only spent 15mins lounging about after getting in from work rather than the usual 30.

Check for any washing to put on: done, hung out, and put away
Start filing system: started and finished!
Email company about faulty goods
Draft letter re: van rental
Finish tidying playroom
Clean up garden
Cut grass
Take measurements of display cabinet
Email person about display cabinet

Ta Da
Insurance form filled out for van
Washing up done
Dry dishes put away
Rubbish and clutter cleared from living room
Nappies put on

We potentially have no power from 8.30am 'til 4.30pm tomorrow so need to work out if/where to go with DD.

I'm nowhere near guest ready and they arrive tomorrow. Oh well.

I have just made a large pan of delicious tomato pasta sauce though .

Trazzles I have been here since the start of the thread. I am no where near what you describe as you want and I have not had your circumstances. If it is in any shape better then you are flying correctly. Frustratingly slow progress is progress and that is what we are aiming for. This time last year i did not have an empty spare room for ds to have gone to hide in. it was floor to ceiling full of boxes. Now it needs a bloody good hoover and dust but there is a bed and only 2 boxes on the floor. Not what I want cos i want it generally clean and tidy but still it is progress. It is frustrating terribly frustrating but remember to give yourself credit for what you have achieved even if it isn't the full achievement that you want at the end point.

Tomo i am still working through laundry, bloody building work has been moved forwards from tuesday to friday morning which means I have tomo to get everything washed before it gets done. And i am in meetings for most of tomo.

ds has just decided that he has too many bath toys and perhaps as he is getting so big that he might consider culling them. I suggested we kept a few and culle the rest. So that aparantly is tomo's job. He is slowly beginning to see the link between decluttering and tidy. mess really does stress him out but being a hoarder... yep you guessed it vicious circle. Think he is looking forwards to getting a room he can keep on top of though.

Cba to deal with stinky kit tonight. cba to do a lot of things tbh. night night

Night night Bitchy

Trazzle you're a star, baby steps, just teeny tiny baby steps. I forget sometimes where I started in this chaos, we've made so so much progress but I thought to myself this morning as I pulled everyone's pants off the drier that it's the first week in ages that I've had to do that. Usually laundry is put in drawers on Monday evenings. But this week I was late home on Monday and the girls were playing with new toys and I had to write some emails and it didn't get done.

But I found a new pack of toothpaste had been opened this morning and the empty thrown away. That the sink was empty and clean in the kitchen and the bags for nursery packed and ready to go. It swings in roundabouts, there are only 24 hours in every day.

Wise words from Bitchy. We all have good reasons for sliding into CHAOS and we need to focus on the progress we've made, not look at how much more we have to do.

Well, I had a stern talk with DS2 this evening, explaining that he needed to start settling to sleep on his own. He wasn't happy about it, but I was firm. I told him we would have a cuddle, then I'd leave him to listen to a story CD whilst I went to make DS1's hot chocolate...

...I woke up two hours after lying down with him . I must have fallen asleep as soon as I put my head down. So much for firm parenting!

Anyway, am off to my own bed now, but here are tomorrow's links first... Hang on, did I actually spend so long writing the round up last night that I forgot to post Tuesday's links? It looks like it. Were you all too kind to tell me? Oops, sorry about that. Anyway, here are tomorrow's (and I'll add in the missing babystep too):

Babystep Number 13: find a mission on Flylady then go and do it.

Babystep Number 14: learn how to use a calendar.

Thursday is errand day.

The mission is here: Wednesday's mission was to clean our bathroom 'vanity' - I think she means storage chest or cupboard, for those of us in the UK. Then give your washing machine a clean with bleach/soda crystals and a hot-water wash.

Thursday's mission is to plan what you'd like to do to improve the bathroom. Think about making a master list of supplies for the bathroom. Then tidy up round the washing machine.

Today's flight plan is here.

Am hoping to take DS2 out for the day tomorrow, so will check in here later. Hope everyone has a good day.

Sootball - sorry, I missed your post. Wise words from you too!

Just popping in to say I have been reading your posts for the last couple of months and thank you so much. I find that if I read each day it helps me find some get up and go for the housework.

Keep up the good work :o)

Come and joins us 4boys, all are welcome

I second that. Thanks for reading, 4boys, and please join us.

Stupid fucking arsing cunting camhs.

And bloody mn removed the ctrl + enter combo for posting. bloody inconvient that is!

Master class in linky poos***

Ok there are many different ways of doing this and which ever way you do it there are a few site based points to note.
the launch pad this page has the initial links to most things that you will want for doing the links. The baby steps are right at the bottom just above FAQ in the grey box.

So now you know where to start to find the links you could click the link and copy and paste it each day or find the link once and edit it from a save list of links.

I have added a space to the web addresses after the word flylady to mess with MN's autoconversion to web links so I can highlight things to show how to edit the links to save constant looking up if you are short of time.

The babysteps
The first baby step
www.flylady .net/d/getting-started/31-beginner-babysteps/
The second baby step
www.flylady .net/d/getting-started/31-beginner-babysteps/day-2/

Day-2 is added to the second babystep and then each on just has the new number at the end so for babystep 17 the link would become:
www.flylady .net/d/getting-started/31-beginner-babysteps/day-17/

The flight plans
www.flylady.net/c/fp.php?tzm=-60
Irrc this automatically updates at midnight ish so just needs to be copied and paste - will check this another day.

The daily focuses
Thursday:
www.flylady .net/d/daily-focus/daily-focus-thursday/
Monday:
www.flylady .net/d/daily-focus/daily-focus-monday/

To get the right daily focus type in the day you want as highlighted.

The missions
www.flylady.net/c/sp.php#missions
This updates weekly

Zones
The zones vary and you really do need to know which zone you are in if you want to just edit the web link:
www.flylady .net/d/zones/zone-3/
This is the one that would be easier just to click on the link in the launch pad at the start of the week when the zone changes, otherwise it is the same link for the whole week. personally i update link in my notepad file once a week and c&p from there but then I am lazy

I think the key thing is to remember about fly lady is:
no perfection
every step towards the goal is progress, progress is good no matter how small
there is life outside housework, this is about trying to find more time for that in the long run.

I think this needs to be remembered in thread leading too. Ok so what if one day you don't get the links posted the night before/until lunch time. Round ups are nice but they are time consuming, if you haven't got time for round ups every night we understand. And most importantly we appreciate everyone who volunteers to take a turn at leading the thread so if it doesn't quite work at first don't worry you'll get it as the month goes on.

Personally i found clicking the link and copying each weblink from the site very useful the first few times I lead the thread as I didn't really know or understand the system fully and it meant I have to properly look at what I was linking to. These days I know that baby step 17 is the early night one and there are a whole heap of wishy washy ones around babystep 20 that really make me just roll my eyes as I ignore them so just use the link list file. bad fledgling

However you chose to lead the thread be yourself every fledgling has their own style and it is nice to mix it up.

Good luck and if this confuses anyone do speak up and ask for anything to be clarified that needs it.

I got bored and wandered off to update my babystep list. Flylady has clearly updated the site since I have proper looked cos the list was out of date. Am happy to pm a copy of the order of the babysteps should anyone want it.

4boys welcome to the dark side. Don't just lurk, join us!!

Not had my coffee yet, nor really done much this morning yet. Not even fed the dcs yet , but will be back later after much needed caffeine to put up my list (which I also still have to write out). Wow. Right on top of things this morning, eh? Not!

Bitchy and Soot you just made me cry on my commuter train you are very right.

At work this morning and then home for more washing and general putting stuff away again before packing for me and DCs as we are going to my homeland tomorrow for a long weekend. I have to drive it's been a few years since I've done long distance motorway driving. I know I can do it, I just need confidence in myself and my ability .

Hope you have a lovely weekend away and good luck with the driving.

Alice - hope the coffee worked.

Bitchy - thanks for the masterclass for newbies.

Well, I was all set to take DS2 out today and we were both looking forward to it. Was up at a decent time, unloaded the d/w and put a few dirty dishes in, put everything on the dishrack away, ironed a top, put the washing on, switched the tumbledryer on again as the washing inside was still damp - and then DS2 came downstairs, clutching his tummy and asking for a hot-water bottle. He complained of a tummy ache yesterday and it's there again today. He has not had an upset stomach, so it's not that. Now, like you SC, I'm worried about appendicitis. And also a bit disappointed that our planned day out can't happen. There was an art workshop involved and a trip to the beach . Oh well.

Morning all!

Trazzles agree with what everyone else has said! Frustrating though it is, you are being incredibly hard on yourself! YOu have effectively had a year out having been thrust in to the one of the most stressful situation life can throw at you; without energy or head space for anything else (and you were still working). YOu have done bloody brilliantly throughout it all and you will get control back over the house but it is going to take time . The fact that you are making progress (albeit slow progress) is a testament to your 'stickability'! It's four steps forward 3 back with housework. Bummer though that is. Oh and good luck with the drive tomorrow x

Bitchy Sorry about camhs Hope you managed to sleep in the end and are feeling a bit less stressed this morning.

Snap! I could have written your post about the spare room!! What was a room stacked with old boxes and dumped furniture is now 85% clear - I've been hoping for several years it would become my sewing room - it hasn't happened yet and I'm deeply frustrated by it but it is so much better than it was thanks to the Fat Fairy!

And that links masterclass is bloody brilliant Bitchy¨thank you so much for it! Think we definitely ought to include it for info every month! Please would you pm me with baby-step order although- shd know it by heart by --now? Ta very muchly! Oh and good luck with getting the laundry done in time!

(Really need to take inspiration from you and your ds and start getting dd back on board about decluttering too. We used to be OK and have a twice annual clear out, once ahead of Christmas and once ahead of her birthday. We still do in fact but dd is more and more reluctant to throw anything out and the playroom is stacked to gunnals! Must get a grip!)

Big waves to 4boys what a lovely post! Come on in!!

Hope you have a good day out with ds2 Toffee!

Hope you have a lovely time with your guests Whoknows they'll be enjoying your delicious pasta sauce so much that they won't notice the house (which, knowing your organisational skills, I bet is not as bad as you think it is either!) !

Plod you are not failing. Remember you are never behind with Flylady. Just jump in where you are at and start again!

Blue don't know what a Nerf gun is but hope your ds1 is feeling a bit cheerier today and that Nutella did the trick and you are feeling less stressed!

Waves to Alice Dizzy Saturn Coffeeandcream and everyone I've missed!

Positively autumnal here this morning and very overcast, which is a shame because I have a big washing day planned. And just realised tomorrow is public holiday so need to re-arrange some appts!

On the positive front 1: went to doc's at 8.45 am this morning (when dd of course was looking the picture of health and exuberance) and doc has totally ruled out appendicitis and declared dd absolutely fit to travel.

On the positive front 2: going today to pick up dd's school stationery order (which traditionally over here numbers about 40 items - yes 40 . One normally has to schlep around about 7 or 8 different different independent shops with every other stressed mother in the country and spend hours looking for plastic notebook covers in wierd sizes and files in twenty different sizes in elusive colours etc. But system has all now (finally!!) been computerised via one outlet and at the press of a button the order is done! Can't tell you what a relief this is! Ho-yaah!

Ta da:
fill washing machine from last night
s&s
finally found some trackie bottoms that are long enough for dd to wear (she has just outgrown 4 pairs in the last month )
rabbits, hamster, fish
doc appt for dd

To do:
laundry, laundry, laundry
re-arrange appts re: tomorrow
go and collect dd's school stationery order
accompany dh to look at a new potential car [sigh]
pick up outstanding bits of updated ill- fitting--- uniform
make melanzane parmigiana
boudoir (again!)
evening routine

Have a good one everybody!

x post Toffee oh no! So sorry that your day trip doesn't look like it is going to happen. Hope your ds2 is OK? As for appendicitis: there is a very definite test that the doc can do (done on dd this am). They press the abdomen in one particular place and if it doesn't "rebound" or some'at and cause pain in another place, then it is 99% not appendicitis. So it can be ruled out quite easily if you can get a doc appt.

Haha, sorry Toffee but that did make me grin. Cuddling down with youngsters is fatal, I often end up drifting off when getting DD down for a nap.

Sort of caught up but not quite. Morning guilt of DD waking up at almost 8am rather than her usual 6, which meant I slept in too. I'm not a morning person but can no longer cope with getting up after 7.30, even 7.30 is pushing it a bit. I feel so guilty and behind for the rest of the day. Must get some motivation because this house is horrendous.

X-post (had screen up for well over an hour meaning to post but not, missed a lot in that time...) Sorry to hear about your DC feeling ill Toffee and having to cancel today's plans.

Tomorrow is a holiday?