July 2014: fledglings follow Flylady's tuition (don't forget your pamper mission)

[ToffeeWhirl]

A big thank you to slackcabbage for superb thread leadership throughout June, as well as a great intro which I am going to shamelessly borrow from now.

Struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (can't have anyone over syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (something that undermines family fun)? In that case, you need Flylady.

Flylady is a system for managing housework. Starting with babysteps, it builds up into a routine which becomes second nature. In theory, once you are used to the system, you will have a tidy house you are not embarrassed by and plenty of time to get on with more interesting things.

Flylady banishes the panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. If you fall off the Flylady bandwagon, it’s no problem: you just jump back in where you are and carry on.

Don't sign up for the Flylady emails as you will be inundated! All the information you need will be linked here on this thread on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, Flylady's steps and routines will be listed here on this thread.

Flylady uses a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

1. start or repeat baby steps

1. repeat baby steps + do 15 mins a day decluttering in the current zone

1. reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

(And detailed deep cleaning in each zone for those who have made real progress – not sure if anyone has reached this pinnacle yet…? I certainly haven’t).

More info here on getting started (but ignore step one!) and Flying lessons. Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings.

Try to ignore Flylady’s purple prose (hard, I know) - the underlying system is sound!

Three key points to keep in mind:

1. No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine.

1. You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.

1. It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy overnight - accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

If you are new, then trying to spend 15 mins decluttering and doing the babysteps is the most you should expect of yourself. Lots of us here like posting our ‘to do’ or ‘ta da’ lists and they can look quite scary. Don’t be put off.

If all else fails, try the power of three – just pick three things that most need doing and focus on those.

And if you have visitors coming over this afternoon and need a quick fix NOW, try Flylady's crisis clean.

We all know each other pretty well on this thread and some of us have been around for a long time, but all lurkers, oldies and newcomers are very welcome!

Okay. I'm done for the day. We all know I'm not, as I have laundry and tea to make, and so on... but I'm done for the BIG CLEAN UP stuff.

Garden mowed - front and back. Hedge trimmed manually (because the stupid electric hedge trimmer doesn't work because the ex just slung all his tools in the shed and it doesn't seem to work properly now). I cleaned out about 1/3 of the shed, filling two rubbish bags, which I will dump at the tip on the way to pick up the dc for an appointment shortly.

Hot and tired here, need to drink something and eat lunch, clean up a bit, change clothes and then run off to the afternoon errands.

I am looking forward to a nice glass of tonight!!

Toffee glad ds1 a bit cheerier and at sandcastle building!

Ellie good you managed to get out for some r & r!

Alice wow at your efficiency!

Ouch Bitchy that sounds painful! But keep going! And hope swanky new Barnet Fair will provide extra motivation. And congrats on total room makeover.

Whoknows and Hyperhops I am truly in awe of your end-of-term extra curricular activity/logistic/complex child care arrangement management! Just reading about it makes me weak at the knees!

Hyperhops adding the purchase of a near adult-sized yellow onesie in to the mix is just cruel frankly!!

Whoknows raising butterflies has become a mandatory part of the summer holidays here now!

Whoknows and Fraggle I have pretty much given up asking dh to do any thing domestic around here (other than cooking and food shopping which he likes) as I can't face the thought of having to clear up after him!

Fraggle good luck with your lists!

Dizzy happy birthday to your ds!

Thanks Blue glad one of us is properly heducated like

Arf at Goth and her dh revisiting their youth

Swan glad home edding possibility project starting well and oh how I can identify with that 'tense anticipation of home-time explosion'! Congrats on ironing marathon too!

Carpe glad good effects of coil removal still very much in evidence [joins in lustily with bad singing ) Good luck with job search!

Hope you enjoyed London trip Peachandblack

Eyelet oh how identify with your statement >"I am desperate to have a home rather than be moving this from surface to surface." (I haven't managed this in nearly a decade )

Shame about the footie Engels

Big waves to Feet PA Castle Honu Pushme Nicknacks Lostprince Mercury Kiaora Sonnet and eveyrone else I have inevitably missed!

Yesterday was so grey and boring and de-motivating. Morning was OK but then dd came back from art workshop and going out was out of the question because it was raining stair-rods. It was was dark and cold and it rained and rained and rained and rained. Then we decided to shred papers. Then looked at dying fish. Then we shredded. It rained some more. Shredded. Rain. Dying fish. Rain. Etc etc. As I say, eeggghhhhh... . I am DESPERATE for a change of scene and green fields.

Today at least it has stopped raining but everywhere is sort of dank and steamy. Even your glasses steam up when you walk around outside! Wierd.

I have just remembered (rather belatedly) that I loathe cooking in the summer holidays for some reason. In term time, it is something (unusually for me!!) that I am really on top of. I plan, I shop, I cook (almost everything from scratch) and I am pretty organised about it. But it's easy because everyone is in their school/work routine and it just flows somehow. (And I do the prep every morning.)

In the holidays, when I have been one on one with dd all day, and the routines are out of the window, I just somehow don't want to do it. Anyone got any ideas? I did look on-line for a slow cooker but they don't seem to sell them in Belgium!

Have a good afternoon everyone!

Sorry, that was yet another whinge-fest wasn't it? [Just narked because I want to go away and dh keeps throwing curve balls in to the schedule]

Oh and sadly de-flagging now... so wanted the Netherlands to win

Swan - he will be turning 21 (how did that happen? ) and works away. The box had 2 cartons of American cereal in and multiple bars of Hersheys chocolate so maybe I should have included toothpaste too

Today I have:

• Booked airport parking
• Organised travel insurance
• Booked DD into multiple holiday activities - mostly sporting

Oh yes, I need to de-flag, there are no longer any teams left that I have any enthusiasm for.

too lazy to deflag. I'll just leave mine.

evening all
carpe great to hear you're feeling so much better
whoknows I have a similar dh!
toffee glad to hear ds is a bit brighter
sc could you plan some really quick and easy meals, maybe more convenience stuff than usual just for the holidays?

well day gone okish today. Sadly, library plan was thwarted due it being shut due strike! So instead we went to shops, searched for yellow onesie - failed, went to playground -played nicely - purchased emergency dvd and went to Mc Donalds
Returned home -cleaner had been and done good job
I then went to work for 2 hours (having sorted complex childcare logistics) and returned to sit in sun in back garden whilst dc played (again nicely
minimal FLYing on my part but did hang out one load of washing and put dogs bedding in to wash,

to do
bring in washing and put away
hang dog bedding to dry
pack bags for scoutastic for dd 3 and4
take ds1 to fencing
take dd1 to archery

not sure what else...bbl

Dh was striking today so I had some help with the kids. Very welcome, as the baby has nit been inclined to sleep for the last few nights. Feeling pretty productive. Dinner cooked, kitchen cleaned, laundry done. Dh did the shopping and made treats for a BBQ we will hopefully be hosting this weekend. Still need to shine that sink.

oh, is he a teacher lostprince? both dcs' schools weren't affected by the strike, so I'd forgotten about it. (sorry) Hope it gives them the outcome they are looking for.

Today we went to Notting Hill and were waylaid by a Eve Standard Journalist to asking us what we thought of the strike...narrowly escaped ds2 giving away our life history/school/address

Anyway a day spent with the cousins, who I am glad to see had refused to be taken to Hampstead Heath wild swimming and wanted to lie about watching Game of Thrones instead. We didn't watch GOT but the 3 twelve year olds went to the park whilst teenagers lounged.

Have now spent what seems like hours packing ds1's suitcase, buying ds1's suitcase, new shoes, toiletries, forcing ds1 to wash, washing his uniform blazer.

Ds2 did more schoolwork today quite happily - most of the day was spent walking though. He was still a bit frazzled by eve though, not appreciating the kerfuffle of ds1's departure.

SC that was a very lyrical description of city ennui [e?] I quite like the rain in the holidays; I find it very cosy but I HATE holiday cooking.

It's odd because I associate so many childhood/teen holidays with delicious food, and cooking obsessively myself in my late teens, experimenting with recipe books etc. Maybe it is just the reality of the drudgery that kills the dream alas.. Also the way that cooking breaks up the day so much, you never can go out without thinking what's for lunch or dinner, packing it, or pre-organising it. Maybe the answer is VATs of hot sort of food, or deli lunches of cold cuts etc.

Cooking in the holidays is a bit lot hit and miss here too. We had toast tonight. but it's so hot that none of us really has an appetite.

Been down the croft today, so another 5 raised beds built, not that I did much with all these big guys around. I'm mainly labouring as there's no point me struggling with the scaffolding planks when they can so easily carry them.

Also done
Morning routines
Library
Rang Letting agent re a couple of repairs
Paperwork

Evening all.

No strike for me today as not my union but partial closure of school made for a quiet day with only one lesson taught but loads of paperwork caught up on.

In an unashamed proud mother boast DS got his sats results today and I am super proud. Level 5 in maths and spag, level 4 reading not got writing yet. Half way through year 5, I wasn't sure he would get 4's so these are amazing for him. I am so proud.

Back later when Masterchef has finished.

Well, DS1 was cheerier, it's true, but has plunged into despair and anxiety again as DH is now delayed: his mother had a fall last night and can't be left alone. The dr says she has a chest infection, so DH has spent all day caring for her and will be with her until she's well enough to be left alone. So, he now can't come and get us. You can imagine how this went down with DS1, although he did manage to say, a bit later, that he hoped Grandma was ok. But his anxiety at being away from home is overwhelming and doesn't leave a lot of room for any other concerns.

DS2 and I cooked lunch for family visitors today, which went very well and, because he'd chosen the recipe and cooked it himself, he did actually eat some as well. We made fish with a vegetable and cheese topping and had apricot buns for pudding. He even tucked into some dried apricots later - I think he'd actually forgotten they were fruit!

Tomorrow, I've suggested we get takeaway fish and chips so none of us have any cooking or washing up to do (SC - would the occasional take away solve your current problem? Or a special lunch out with DD, which means you only have to do a smaller meal in the evening?).

Have banished both boys to their own beds tonight and told them not to disturb me. I'm just desperate to get a night to myself.

Have just seen that I put Babystep 15 last night. Sorry, that should have said 10.

It's Babystep 11 tomorrow: add an inspirational page to your control journal.

Friday is declutter your purse (bag) and car day.

Friday's mission is to sweep and mop your kitchen floor.

Flight plan, with a resume of Friday's routine, is here.

Night all.

Sorry to hear about MIL Toffee and the effect it's had on DS1.

SC - I used to love cooking but sadly my children have managed to take all the joy out of it, between the pair of them and their fussy ways the whole process makes me feel like weeping on a regular basis. It is slightly easier in the holidays because I'm not doing it with one eye on the clock to get out to Cubs, Brownies, drama etc, but given that the only two meals both of them will eat happily are pizza and pasta (and DH doesn't like pasta) I find the whole process soul-destroying now.

Anyway, back to busy end of term stuff. DD's first performance with the drama club tonight, it was great, she was great. Unfortunately couldn't hear her terribly well (along with a lot of the younger ones) but her body language, expression and dancing were really good. Going again tomorrow night (and have got roped into helping behind the bar thinks I must have mug written on my forehead).

Ellie - well done to DS, fabulous news!

Managed a bit more Flying today, ran vac round, did a load of washing, nagged DH into shifting the duvets, emptied the wastepaper bins. Also watered the allotment and the garden. Sports Day tomorrow, DD is going to be shattered by the end of the week. Also school disco for DS, they are both going to be shattered.

DS1 has crept back into bed with me . At least I managed to get some more of my essay done first.

Bloody hell! We are having the worst rain storm ever! And the roof we had patched up at vast expense during the winter has now starting leaking again in 3 places . Half of the floors are wet, including in the room where my books are stored (fortunately they are in boxes up high on shelves). Mahoosively scary thunder and lightening too! Nowt like having to go up and down 5 flights of stairs with mops and buckets at 2.45 in the morning to make one feel exhausted energised!

Thank you all so much for holiday food ideas and suggestions which are much appreciated. Will be back tomorrow to review and reply properly!

Well, that was nice, dh and I just got back in to bed to find that that was soaking wet as well. Have had to strip sheets and mattress cover and hang them up and go and find other places to sleep. Nothing like luxury living eh ... .

Sod it, if I've told dh once, I've told him a thousand times. Once the roof goes, you may as well wave goodbye to the rest of the house ... .[anger]

[Searches for Bob the Roof's mobile number for the morning ... .]

Oh no slack how awful. I hope you manage to sleep....(and you toffee). Dh is not a teacher Alice he is a Civil Servant though. Striking probably won't make much difference, and he looses a days pay everytime he does it, but it's the only form of protest he has.

SC - that's awful . I'm so sorry about your eventful night. Hopefully, DH will now accept that the roof needs more work, but that sounds horribly expensive. .

Who - it's so sad to hear you say that about cooking. I feel exactly the same way, thanks to the fussiness and complaints from my family when faced with one of my meals (and I'm not a bad cook). It's so demoralising.

Both DC are still asleep (although DS1 is stirring beside me), so I'm going to work on my OU essay again. Six days till the deadline, but we have appointments on some of those days which will make work impossible.

Raining today. Will have to take Ds2 down to the beach in the rain as he wants to inspect his 'pier' that he built from sand and was very glum when I wouldn't take him yesterday (because of the poor weather). It was hard for me to remain sympathetic, to be honest, because he went on and on and on about it. Luckily, television and his Harry Potter book distracted him in the end.

Done
up at 5.20am to get ds1 off to Belgium
however, in timehonoured fashion we all had to wait at least an hour for the coach to turn up due to accident on the motorway (luckily not our coach !) and it felt a bit like "If" (the Kipling If not the film I mean); although Teachers did not show it, and stayed calm..I was very tense at thought of them missing the ferry etc..not a good virtual traveller moi)
but in the end I waved him off [sob][relief]

SC oh dear, there was talk of mud from one of the other mothers..I was so busy thinking it was going to be hot and sunny (and sweaty and who was going to make him have a shower etc) I forgot about the possibility of it raining all week.
I would force your dh to sit down over next few days and discuss repairs properly, even if it just a forward planning arrangement - I know you have the FIL issue to deal with too. I need to ring the roofer too. I cancelled our appt, but now that the shed is cleared he might be able to get his ladder through. Our chimney breasts are still suppurating. I cannot get anything done in the holidays because I am mostly not here (and then he won't deal with the builders) and when I am here, dh will say he is busy with work and doesn't want the disruption He is basically not interested in repairs unless the ceiling falls on his head [grr] which it has done,once.

Toffee I think your ds1 did very well to recognise your MIL was feeling ill and needed dh, even if it took a while for him to articulate it. I know that ds2 was not at that level of empathy if he is thwarted. When you are waiting for something to happen there is a whole new level of tension isn't there, you cannot concentrate on anything except the thing which is delayed. Difficult to fill the vaccuum with something else. Could you leave both of the boys with your mum for 2 hours and just go somewhere, anywhere for headspace?

I feel like a cracked record..I feel fine and then I keep remembering I have to deal with the Home Ed decision AND pack for Spain cope with leaving house and cats and feel SICK with nerves...Cleaning lady is here again this morning as she was sick last Friday - I desperately need to sort out the piles of clutter so she can do some cleaning..

Whoknows hurrah for dd's performance - I love seeing second evening of any performance, so many subtle differences in a live show. Bar will be fun - think of all those compliments and hope you are looking forward to the Golden Wedding. Which reminds me it is my parents' Golden Wedding too, and we 4 children have organised nothing, although it is difficult as the parents are so peripetatic. My father is turning up some time today (I am told) to pick up some old chairs and a tent and drive them back to Ireland, I will question him then as to if he even remembers he has been married 50 years. I expect he is in denial. I think he thinks he is still 30.

This thread has reminded me in a very positive way that oddly I Love Rain! Toffee your talking about the sand in the rain reminds me of Wexford mornings the grey sky and the grey swell and wearing kagoules on the beach, it pelting with rain, and then going back to a nice fire and some stewed rhubarb. And the way the beach is always deserted when it rains.

Sorry you have had such a shit night SC

we have entered end of term meltdowns. TO the point where I am not even considering changing the current plans to include some really nice fun things because ds just couldn't handle the change which is necessary to accommadate them. At least this hasn't happened as earlier as it could do

Reaches for Toffee's and gratefully ... .

Thanks all!

Certainly good weather for frogs! We slept solidly the rest of the night thankfully. Only problem is, Bob the Roof appears to be on holiday, but we have other builders in office atm, so they may know of someone ...not very satisfactory but looking at the weather forecast ... we need to get contingency plans in place pretty fast.

Toffee I'm so sorry, in all of the kerfuffle, I missed the post about your mil. I hope she wasn't too shocked by her fall and that she recovers from her chest infection speedily. Sounds as though your night's sleep wasn't exactly uninterrupted either! Good luck with juggling your OU assignment as well as keeping the kinder happy.

Toffee/Whoknows/Swan/Hyperhops/Goth thank you all for holiday cooking comments and advice. Much appreciated! Sorry to hear how stressful family cooking is for some of you on a day to day basis as well.

One of the problems here is that dh is obsessed with food and would never, ever, settle for toast for supper (although I would happily!) and is never 'not hungry' eg this week, with dd at art class in the mornings, I tried to go for more substantial lunches, but that just backfired badly and seemed to make everyone hungier and more expectant re: substantial suppers!

But thanks to your suggestions, I think I am going to go with a combination of more convenience/take out dishes (within reason): return to to term-time soup/veggie dish cooking routine on a Thurs (which I have let slide recently) and maybe cook with dd two mornings a week to make it a 'fun' activity, eating out more, and picnics (weather permitting).

I think all of this was more to do with my unrealistic expectation that somehow cooking wouldn't be such a chore in the holidays, when as Swan says, the reality doesn't quite match up with that somehow! Had better get used to it, because although we are going away soon, we are going to be largely self-catering throughout the holidays!

Ellie congratulations to your ds on his SAT results!!

And well done to your dd Whoknows re: her drama performance!

Sounds as though croft is coming on brilliantly Goth!

Swan hope ds1 enjoys his trip! And arf at side-stepping journalists!

Absolutely brill to hear that you managed to find some time to sit in the sun for a bit Hyperhops!!!

Big waves to Dizzy, Lostprince, Alice and everyone else!

Better get back to bop and mucket duty ...have a good day everyone!