Arrrrgh... Taking stuff to charity shop!

[BrownSauceSandwich]

Or trying to. OH regularly complains we (or rather, I) have too many books, so there's no room for the ones he wants (seems fair enough to me, as he never reads them, but thinks that just owning them makes him an expert in every subject).

So this morning I have bagged up a load of my books, mostly unused gifts and duplicates, to take to the charity shop. Now he's fishing out books about gardening, in case he "gets into gardening in the next couple of years and wants to use them". He has NEVER shown the faintest inclination to do anything in the garden. I do EVERYTHING that gets done out there (I'm no expert, but the garden looks nice), and I have never needed these fucking books to do it.

Am I not entitled to at least get rid if my own stuff?

The first rule of getting rid of things is to do it when no one else is around!

DH is the worst at this, he gets all ruthless and makes me throw away the kids cuddly toys, books etc. He put's them in the boot and goes of to dispose of them only to return misty eyed saying things like " Big Dog just looked so sad" or " don't you remember when DS1 tried to read this" and we both weep pathetically and continue to live in a tip!

Posted too soon!
I think Big Dog will end up living with us when the DC have left home.
I imagine him lying between DH and I in bed when we are old!

I get rid of a lot to charity shops but have about a 10% change of heart return rate. DH rarely does it but when he does it shows how badly out of touch he is with the DCs tastes, he tries to get rid of stuff they love, so I always have to intervene.

We have a awful lot of toy rabbits, from tiny to the hight if a six year old, many from before we even had DCs.

Rabbits are a long standing joke, I can't even remember exactly how it started. I think DMIL and DH agreed I rabbit on a bit and it sort of stuck, and became an affectionate pet name (long before that kind of rabbit came along).

We seriously need a cull, of said rabbits and never played with large teddies, but I get all and chicken out.

Yes, I really should have done it when he wasn't looking, but he was volunteering to drive as he had some of his parents old crap to get rid of (not before trying to persuade me that we should keep that, too. Grrrr).

I kind of understand the difficulty parting with cuddly toys, but definitely not gardening books!

I have a bin bag of books in my boot for the charity shop, different problem to yours, I can't get rid of them! All charity shops round here are on red routes (£80 fine!) When the restrictions are not working the charity shop is shut what to do? Very heavy bag.

That's a tricky one. I must admit most of mine goes to the two that I can park right outside. Some of ours have loading bays round the back that you can drop off at, maybe check that out?

Do you not get bags put through your letter box where the charities come and pick up your stuff? We probably get 2 or more bags each week.

We get little flurries of these, will get 2 or 3 over a couple of weeks then none for months. They never seem to come when I actually have anything to get rid of.

How true... I bet we get half a dozen charity collections offered this week. Mind you, I always doubt whether they're really collecting for who they say they're collecting for, if you know what I mean.

Yes, some of them do look dodgy.

We do get those charity bags but they only ever want clothing ( to sell?? )

Another Big Dog owner here!

British Heart Foundation have collecting bins for books and CDs which are usually at recycling points or tips - I got rid of a load of hardbacks over a two week period by taking a couple of bagfuls anytime I was going that way. Our recycling also takes paperbacks - check your councils website

British Heart Foundation also do free collections

We will never be rid of Big Dog. 12 year old DS still wakes up with the raggedy old thing wrapped up in his arms.

I am chuffed to have three black bin bags full for rag bag collection, just need to move them beyond hallway into car and out of the bloody house.

On past form this could take half a year.

For books check your local authority website, ours states what recycling bins are where. There is a book one, and I will find it.

BrownSauce you are daft. First rule of decluttering is to do it with nobody around. Children can wail if they see their toys or clothes going into charity bag and adults can get stroppy and demand removal of item from bag.
They won't miss it once it's gone and they did not see it's departure.

holly I think you can allow small children some leeway because they haven't lived very long so need to be offered the chance to really outgrow things.

With adults, I fully agree. Why is something which has been stuck in a box in the loft for 20 odd years now of vital importance, that you mustn't throw away? Why is it suddenly now that DH decides that he really can't live without [broken light switches/someone else's time sheets (not even his own!) when he was on shift with them way back when/etc/ etc.]

I think we should start a Big Dog owners support thread!

I tend to put DC stuff away for a month, if it's not mentioned then off it goes. This has backfired once when DS1 saw some of his things at the school fair and bought them back! I only give toys the DC tell me they don't want to the school fair now.

When I donate to the charity shop I have to literally bag it up and take it to them there and then as I have the habit of going through it again and taking bits out

I took dh old shirts to charity shop yesterday that I have never seen him wear (they are from his batchelor days) he will never notice but if is asked him to go through them then they would have stayed. Besides giving to charity is good

Our local co-op takes books to sell for a charity. I thought it was a national thing? May be worth checking?

I have always decluttered with the kids with me. I do one childs things at a time. They get to say 'bin' or 'keep'. If they are unsure, we discuss when they last used/played with it? If they then say keep, when I wouldhappilyget rid, we keep it without dispute, it rarely survives the next round. Sometimes they feel better if they can give it to someone they know. Eg yesterday we did ds' s room. He had a few things that were still in really good condition, but that he hasn't played with in ages. He didn't want to bin/charity shop them, but suggested that we give them to our 3yr old friend who is def a fan of these items. Win win. Space cleared and organised. And the 3yr old was delighted with them today when we gave them to him.

As I put dd2, aged 5 to bed this evening she asked me 'when can we do my stuff, I need to give some away as I cant tidy my room.' She is fabulously ruthless, a girl after my own heart. Dd1 is a bit more sentimental but I thinl it may be because I didnt start this until about 3 yrs ago.

I decided to do it this way as I have watched enough hoarding programmes to realise that it is usually linked to a loss in life. I used to hate coming home from school to find my bombsite of a bedroom had been blitzed and half of it was missing. My parents are not great at getting rid of stuff, but they are lucky in that they have the space to organise it well. Its quite comical really, they both blame each other, a classic case of one mans meat is another mans poison.