I feel like Stig of the dump's messier cousin. Help!

[EatingAllTheCrumpets]

I hate cleaning. Detest it, loath it. By nature I'm very disorganised and messy. DH is a love and cleans regularly but I need to pull my weight.

Problem is I have no idea where to start. I had considered a cleaner for a one off deep clean to get me started, but a) we can't afford it and b) I'd be bloody embarrassed for anyone to see my house

So I'm asking the wise and houseproud MNers for advice

What should I be doing on a daily, weekly and monthly basis? And will I have to spend all weekend cleaning?

DH cleans the bathroom suite and he hoovers all the carpets twice a week.

We have a 3 bed house with a kitchen, bathroom and living room / diner. Appliance wise we have a fridge-freezer, microwave, oven, dishwasher and washer/dryer.

I'm at the end of my rope and its really starting to get me down, please help

Are you me?

I just thought "oh I don't remember typing this!" So I will lurk for advice.

Me too! Funny thing is, I clean for a friend, spend 2 hours a week making her house sparkling clean, then come home to my dusty dump! I had hoped it would spur me on to clean my own house, but it just saps any enthusiasm I may have had and I can't be arsed.

From my experience of cleaning her house I would suggest firstly a big clear out, room by room, as its much easier to clean when its tidy , so get everyone to help with their own room (bin bag in each, tell them anything left on the floor will go in the bin bag.) Put a bin in every room too (I'm buying those bin basketball hoops to make putting stuff in the bin more entertaining for everyone, including DP!)

Then allocate a 2 hour slot once a week, that's all you need really. Dust first, clean all bathrooms, then hoover, then mop hard floors. For a 4 bed house that is all achievable in about 2 hours. The next time it will be much easier because it won't be as dirty. Then do one other job per week (wipe down kitchen cupboards, clean windows, cobwebs/skirtings)

I do sweep the floors 2 or 3 times a week but actually if I got my act together it would be quicker to hoover instead - it helps to have all the stuff you need in one place too, saves traipsing up and down stairs for things.

and I find that putting on one load of washing a day most days I can keep on top of it but I don't change the beds very regularly and if it builds up or I have a day or two off, I will do 2 or 3 loads, especially when it dries so quickly outside. I'm planning on making it DS1's job to sort the clean clothes and put them in the correct rooms and will make the DC's pocket money dependent on them doing certain jobs because I'm finding it too overwhelming at the moment.

yes it's the tidying that I struggle with. I don't actually hate cleaning but its the need tidy up first that buggers the job up

terrible pigsty at the moment

I feel your pain, I am not a natural cleaner/tidier and I really struggle to keep on top of things. DH is very good at one off mega tidy ups but we are both terrible at general maintenance. This didn't really matter when it was just the 2 of us but is not sustainable with children.

I would suggest trying to get 1 room the way you like it as it will inspire you to do the same with other things.

I tend to do 2 loads of washing at a time as my tumble dryer takes 2 loads. I have 2 wash days a week, which are the 2 days I don't work. I am never on top of the ironing.

I try to keep the kitchen counters cleared every day but don't look at the kitchen table

I am really trying to adopt the 2 MN mantras - don't put it down, put it away, and - every item has a place.

Oh god I'm so happy I'm not the only one

Only me and DH so I do keep on track with washing and drying which will be a help!

Donut 2 hours, really? Honestly? I could, in theory, do that on a Saturday morning while DH is at work! Should I be doing windows and skirting etc every other week?
Thanks for the run down of jobs, very helpful, I've popped them on my to-do list in order!

I do need a massive declutter, I'm a hoarder, can't bare to throw anything away and form attachments with things. I am going to try and get rid of lots of my crap, and put things in the loft tomorrow.

The actual cleaning part, easily doable in 2 hours, its the tidying that's a bugger, but again, once you get on top of the worst of it, its much easier to keep that way (especially without any pesky kids messing it up the minute you've done it!)

I wouldn't do those other jobs more than once or twice a year, its just they are the things you won't get done in the 2 hours.

Hey, if you join us on the minimalist thread (called 'm', ha ha!) you will see that actually we are all secret hoarders who struggle massively with decluttering and understand how hard it is. Well, me and maybe one other person. I don't post there much actually, but it is inspiring.

Also, god NO to windows every other week! Sorry, but I think you should be realistic about what you might actually do and get the must-dos done first. Windows can wait (unless you can't see through them or notice hand prints and it bugs you).

Finally, I have been listening to a self-hypnosis track on YouTube called something like, 'Be Clean and Tidy' or something, and it is totally working! I'm a bit obsessed with self-hypnosis now, so forgive me if I go on about it, but it has been amazing.

Thanks donut, will be tackling the tidying tomorrow. Already feeling less stressed as I have a plan of attack thanks to MN!!

Corestrength - windows aren't that bad thankfully will be popping over to 'm' too.
I'm going to look into that hypno on YouTube, I'm a huge fan at the mo, after years of low self esteme and insomnia hypnosis apps have got me in a much better place. So feel free to go on about it, I do all the time!

One thing I've noticed is that whenever I think "I need to hoover" I manage to put myself off by thinking I should dust first, or that i need to mop afterwards, and then it will no longer be a quick job, it will be a big job. One thing I've (only very recently) realised is that if you need to hoover, just do that. Once its done, then if you have time for other things, great, if not at least you've hoovered! That and the washing up are 2 things guaranteed to make your house look tidier without too much effort.