Need to get rid of stuff, how do I get over guilt of giving away/binning rather than selling it

[porthcurnick]

House is bursting, 3 kids, 2 adults, very small terraced house, only 2 bedrooms are usable at the moment (and they are stuffed full) 3rd bedroom is attic conversion and is being used as a dumping ground and is literally full pretty much to the ceiling and the stairs up to it as well, IT'S BAD.

We need to start using attic as a bedroom now, but can't seem to clear it, I keep trying but I never get there, I think it needs a bomb

My main problem is a lot of it is either brand new or in perfect condition, 2 double pushchairs, a lot of baby toys, 2 brand new scooters in the box that we will never use for instance, gawd knows what else is up there.

I just can't get over giving it to the charity shop when we could really do with the money, but I never ever get round to selling it, I'm not even sure where to, we have no babysitter so car boot is difficult and I think I would be annoyed when loads of it didn't sell, would the charity shop even want 2 massive double pushchairs, and about 30 bin bags full of toys and books (at least). I have already given massive amounts to the charity shops, but I don't seem to make a dent.

So it all just sits there, arrghh help me, I really want to be using the house properly. Am very, very tempted to just keep filling the car and getting DH to drive the whole lot to the tip, but can't quite bring myself to do it. WHY CAN'T I JUST SORT IT, am shouting at myself not you whole house is a mess.

Have a garden sale. put posters up, cards in post office, stick a sign on a road to your house. Just stick it all in the garden and wait for the punters on a saturday morning.

Do you have a camera phone and are you on Facebook? If so you might consider using your local For Sale groups (I didn't know they existed but once you've found one it should lead to more).

Like you, I hate to throw out as we need the money but just wasn't finding enough time to eBay everything (taking great photos, writing long descriptions, calculating packaging & postage/courier etc). Facebook is much easier, poorer quality phone photos are fine and people will ask questions so you don't have to spend as much time on descriptions. It's free so you can ask less money, plus people will make offers. I now have a system of listing things (& moving them to a shelf in our garage), reducing the price after 1 week if unsold then giving away (via local free boards)

The trick is determining whether something is worth the effort in the first place. Facebook free boards are great for those things that you can't bear to just throw but are not worth selling (e.g. Bags of unbranded clothes & PJs, old kids wellies, slightly battered toys, etc)

If you are use FB you will probably have a selling page for your area and they will come round and collect the stuff from you. I have sold quite a few bits this way.

I am currently clearing the crap stuff out of my house and I'm finally seeing results. I can see the kids carpet now it does take time so don't expect to get quick results but keep at it, it's worth it. I have donated at least 30 bags to the charity shops in the last couple of months, I'm pissed off with myself for letting it get that bad but it's a lot better then it was :)

Apart from things with a high-ish value I would just get rid, I sorted out loads of clothes to sell and they sat there for months so I just donated the whole lot in the end

Set aside a day and get a friend or two to come round and help you and be absolutely ruthless. Divide all the stuff into "keep", "charity", "sell" or "tip" then dispose of the stuff immediately or you'll just store it again. The high value big stuff like pushchairs can be put on ebay as collection only so you don't have to faff with a courier. Anything which has seen better days can go to charity or be freecycled which is a great way of shifting stuff with minimal effort on your part. You could also try placing cards in local shops for the bigger stuff and then the buyer will collect it from you.
Your local playgroups may well be very glad of the toys and books if you don't want to sell them.
If you could do with the cash, sell the stuff which is brand new in boxes on Ebay as you should get back a good deal of what you paid and it will be worth the effort.
I know it's difficult to tackle what seems like a huge task (I've been there!!) but you wil get a great sense of satisfaction and achievemnet when it's done and you have a lovely useable space in your loft.
Good Luck!!

Can you start eBaying the big stuff... list just one thing a week/day, see how it goes...

When stuff sells, you'll see an instant gap on the floor and feel motivated!

Netmums local for sale boards also good for kids stuff, and free to list.

I hear they have them on MN too, but my local one doesn't seem to have taken off yet. If you can't be bothered to take pics, get them off the internet and write a good description.

Flog your baby and preschooler stuff at an NCT Nearly New Sale - you just tag it all up and take it down and they sell it for you and take a cut (or they do it table top where you pay a one-off fee).

Doing a sale from your garden is a brilliant idea. No schlepping about and you can make a bit of cash.

Freecycle other stuff and feel all virtuous and green.

Can you sell it on MN? The for sale boards are, I think quite active.

or - you could always advertise it on your MN Local board?

There is also a For Free section.

Your problem is because you are overwhelmed by the massive task you have ahead of you. Break it down into bite-sized pieces and plan in when you are going to sort it out. Write it into your diary/calendar and keep that time protected.

Do it bit by bit and the task will seem less gargantuan.

A garden sale might be an idea, sounds quite easy, I would actually be quite happy to stick the lot out the front and somebody take it away if they could use it, I think it's just wanting to know it's going somewhere it will be used.

I have seen the charity just binning stack loads of decent stuff because it hadn't sold at some way over inflated price, so it put me off donating.

DH just said to me on the phone, even if we were to get say £500 which would be really useful - just had a bill of £1000 to get car through MOT , but wouldn't you pay £500 to have all the space in the house back, which I would.

It seems so simple, but it's all still sat there.

Sell what you can, as suggested up thread. What you can't sell give to your local church, charities, charity shops, family, friend's, neighbours, if you ask around I'm sure you'll find someone who knows someone who needs/could use what you have.

Once you've cleared what needs to go, keep clearing on a regular basis to stop things building up again.

Try gumtree for the larger stuff too - it's quicker and easier than ebay, and you don't pay any fees.

For things like prams/pushchairs/highchairs/cots I have put notices in the newsagent's window or Tesco Express's noticeboard. Then someone comes round and you don't have to send it off or carry it anywhere.

E-bay can be excellent but it is a right pain to list things and not worth it for piddling amounts.

And I have just treated myself to a mini skip! Ah... bliss. It's so liberating to just hurl things away(rubbish things, obviously - I'm not that profligate!).

Porthcurnick if it's making you feel that bad then you are right, it's not worth the money. I'd suggest posting the "2 pushchairs..." description you gave on your OP onto a few local groups/boards and then setting a date for a garden sale as suggested by others.

Gaining a room is worth more than £500.

you're making excuses woman :-) just go to the room, pick up a box/bag and deal with it now...go on! hop it!

decide....bin, sell or give away. If bin get rid, giveaway make a phone call and get it collected, sell as others have mentioned. It will take you half an hour tops.....

on your marks, get set, go!

Our local NCT group will let you give away stuff for free on their Facebook and egroup pages.

That said there are several businesses round here in middle-class Nappy Valley land that will come and sort your house out for you for a huge fee.

Ooh, if you do a skip put a sign on it saying that people are welcome to help themselves but they do so at their own risk. That way you get more space in the skip but don't have to bother with door knockers.

BIWIttheBold I think that's it, I just can't imagine a time when I could empty that attic bedroom, but I just need to start, ebay I find a bit imtimadating, but the 'other site' board might be a bit simpler.

I have had a really good go at the rest of the house - although some more has crept down from the attic since then, it was all very bad and then the boiler broke down so we needed to get a plumber round, thankfully it was mild weather so we spent about 6 weeks before christmas just throwing stuff out before we phoned anyone - it was that bad.

My sister has just had a baby, so I have off loaded some onto her, but I don't want her house to end up like ours so am trying not to over load her, I would hate anyone else to end up like this.

I just need to start don't I and stop worrying so much really about where it's going so long as it's gone.

Damn it. Wrote a long post and it got eaten

If you've got stuff that's not worth selling, then freecycle/tip/charity shop that lot FIRST. It'll clear a load of space and motivate you to do the rest.

Then work down items in order of size/value.

Lots of baby stuff that you'd think would be worth money doesn't often go for much on ebay, but can go better on FB/gumtree so that's worth checking out and doesn't take too long.

Go now..,. Go and get one binbag and fill it with crap.

NCT sales are excellent for this - the fact that it's a single fixed date is really motivating, and the big items like pushchairs and scooters sell brilliantly, much better than clothes. Go on, google them now and find out your nearest one.

Um - don't know why you can't ebay? Give everything a really low start price and a short selling time (say 3 or 5 days) so that you will know pretty soon if it has sold or not.
Have everything ready by the front door, post its with selling number on, people will come and collect bigger items locally (double buggies etc). They might not go for tons but at least you will get them out your house. Think of it on saving petrol money on trips to the tip...

If it is still in boxes or with tags on you can always see if the store will take it back. I buy DD's outfits from costco and if I don't use them they get returned for full price of what I paid (no receipt too). DH has a horrible shopping habit. If it still has the tags on I try to return it. Even if they give me the discounted price back it is often far more than what I would get for it 2nd hand.

Other great place to sell stuff is gumtree and NCT.

Didn't know about the Facebook option...thanks for that tip...

We were bringing a load for the tip down each day, filling the car boot and then DH was taking to the tip on the way home from work, but then he started working later so that stopped, we need to start that again a few times a week.

I will read through again and use one of these suggestions for the prams, they are big and once they are out of the way we'll be able to see whats up there and sort better.

I actually have 3 big sackfuls of brand new looking toys and books in the corner in our room, I had sorted them for a NCT sale a month back, they were going with the prams and scooters, but I ended up in hospital so never got a chance to do all the labelling and get them there.

Should just get DH to take them to the charity shop at the weekend really and hope they don't end up binning them, or just not think about what they do with them.

I have no problem sorting and binning, it's just that the sorted sacks of better stuff then just sits there, or the children pull it all out again and insist that they need this car etc. It's the 'right what do I do with it now' bit where I stall.

Also you can FreeCycle large batches of crap as "suitable for car boots" I object to giving stuff away for other people to profit from but many people do car boots for charity which I am fine with.

Also worth looking locally as there are companies who will list your items on e-Bay for you and then post them when they are sold (obviously for a fee) The one I used to know locally seemed quite reasonable though I am too tight never used them.

Do you have friends that could help you? I realise you might be too embarrassed to have them round to help but could you ask if they'd take some of the stuff that might have a resale value and sell it for you? You could offer to go halves?

Alternately be brave and tell us where you live and a local MNer might volunteer to take a boot-full of bags and sort & sell them for you.