Help me let go of all this STUFF

[starrychime]

I really need help with this I think. Recently moved house and am trying to declutter as I unpack gradually - didn't have time before moving. I don't really mind getting rid of stuff that I've collected over the years and have taken a fair bit to charity shops, given stuff away etc. However my mum died a year or so ago and when clearing out her house I took loads of stuff - china, table linen, ornaments, cutlery

I'm in a similar place with my dads stuff. He died 6 years ago. I have every piece of his clothing, and lots of his personal stuff too.

I have been able to keep it as we have had the space, but now DD is here and has more stuff than the Queen of Sheba it has to go.

I know it has to go, but I can't help you with how as I havn't got that far myself. I think it will have to be a 'rip the plaster off' type thing and just clear it all in one day.

For the things you have you could make a scrap book/box.
Cut a sample of the bed linen and a photo of the whole thing and build up a scrap book.

For things like the cutlery could you get rid of yours and replace it with you DM's?

I think it probably is a comfort blanket for you, mine is, and although I do still have a lot of family, I so desperatly miss the comfort and security of my DF, and the safety he gave me.

You could start a bit at a time if you can't face it all. Start with the things with least emotional value, the curtains and linen etc. Then leave it a while before moving on to something else.

My dad died the day I signed for my first house, so I had use for all of his furniture and house hold things, but I think now if it were to happen, I might contact some refuge/shelters and offer the stuff to people in need - thinking along the lines that helping some one who is having a bad time and making a difference might 'take the edge off' my feelings of letting go.

I havn't been much help have I!

Oreo, glad to hear others sort of feel the same way as me
The furniture doesn't bother me so much although I did keep a few pieces which were in storage for ages and now are in my new house - that'll be me trying to recreate my childhood again but at least I'm using those things now.

I guess I could use things like the cutlery although when I was small it was always the 'good' stuff ie. special occasions onlly. I think I just need to get my head round the 'it's only things' way of thinking - I have loads of photos and memories which friends tell me are way more important than 'stuff' and most of the things DD has never been and will never be interested in so it's not as if I'm going to be handing down these 'heirlooms'.

My grandmother died with a whole roomful of stuff that she deemed "too good" to use. I really don't believe in that - if you've got good stuff, use it and enjoy it every day.

Take your cutlery and crockery to the charity shop and use your mum's. Hang her curtains and use her linen - what more lovely way to remember her every day of your life?