Happy New Year, January's here, fly with the fledglings to get clutter clear

[ToffeeChristmascake]

Welcome to the January Fledgling Flying thread. A very big thank you to Ellie, our intrepid leader, for guiding us through the frantic Christmas month.

We are not strict followers of the Fat Fairy and take some of the babysteps - such as getting dressed to lace-up shoes - with a pinch of salt. We also strongly advise against signing up for the FlyLady emails.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's tips on restoring order to our homes, using one of the following methods:

1. Babysteps
2. Babysteps + 15 mins daily decluttering
3. Babysteps + daily missions

Following the babysteps helps to establish daily routines and build a weekly plan.

This month's motto is: You can't clean clutter! See here for Flylady's advice on decluttering.

If you are overwhelmed by the mess in your home, start with just one thing: shine your sink.

And if you need to sort out the house after the New Year revelry is over, a crisis clean is what you need.

Back shortly with tomorrow's babystep .

(With apologies to Ellie for plagiarising some of last month's intro')

I'm back! Very impressed Swan

Still to do :
Cook tea
clip branches off xmas tree as it is now too dead to move through the house!!
Put stuff in dryerdone
IRONdone

The branch clipping may have to wait for 2 pairs of hands and the rain to stop as I can't be bothered to get wet going to garage to find clippers!!

arabella - 'tis a loooong time since mine were 11 months but I would say don't panic!! Be organised the night before with yours and babies stuff and trust the nursery's advice etc. Above all enjoy going back to work and the fact that you can go to the loo in peace...(don't suppose that helped at all but I know other fledglings with LOs will be around later..)
Lair - frozen grapes....why???

Hello all

Today
I've tidied/hoovered/dusted sitting room - Sky man due v soon to install HD box.

Ironed some laundry.

Update on my hoover search! I got a Miele! In Argos! Great suction!!

To do

Declutter - got charity bag in letterbox so going to fill it!!

OM Why not very lovely

Afternoon all,

Arabella my two are 6 and 4 now but both went to nursery at about 10 months when I went back to work. It is a bit nerve racking but I'm sure you will soon settle down into your new routine, as OM said make sure you have everything ready the night before, take your time in the morning so you can spend a little time with your DC at the nursery before leaving. You can always give them a ring during the day to check they are Ok, I'm sure they will be.

Better go, need to do a few jobs before the school run.

lair - will give it a go then!! Maybe it can replace sweets!!

first lot of decs off the Xmas tree [done]
I have my clippers at the ready OM
found in dh's study Xmas tablecloth and Xmas plates..oh and the Stable buried under a lot of photos

I mean to say, we got them from loft, but they never made it to the sitting room..boo!

CHrist Almighty, the whole house is covered in pine needles now AAARGH. Nearly locked myself out wrestlng it onto the front path.
Now need to pick up children to mix with pine needles [grrr]

Xmas tree decs down and outside done

Have finished the unpacking, taken the Christmas decorations and tree down and put everything away, but am still feeling frustrated by the amount of clutter everywhere. Which is why I am on MN rather than tackling it. But DH has just started building his Lego mediaeval village with the DC, so I've decided to have some me time too.

Dolanette Glad to hear you're pleased with the Miele.

arabella I also get DH to do the Christmas lights, so would second the delegation option! Good luck with your LO starting nursery - don't panic, I'm sure he/she will be fine. I remember how nervous I felt the first day that DD1 went to her childminder's, but she loved it; it generally seems to be more of an ordeal for the parents than the DC!

Lair Had never thought of freezing grapes; I wonder if I could persuade the DC that they're tastier than Gummi bears...

OM Going straight back to exams must have been a bit of a shock to the system for your DD; I hope she didn't have to spend the entire holidays revising.

swan Am wondering whether I can drag the DC away from the Lego to write their thank you letters - DD2 did say she wanted to write a letter earlier, but I failed to seize the moment.

Toffee I really hope your meeting with the head went well - it's such an awful situation for your DS to be in, so I hope you can get things sorted out as soon as possible.
Yes, we're off to my ILs tomorrow. It will be good to get away from the clutter but doesn't solve the problem long term, of course. Am determined to do some serious decluttering once the DC are back at school.

Nettie At first glance, I thought the last item on your list was 'Eat flake'. It sounded good to me, though!

feetheart Hope you found a good recipe. I felt inspired to try out lamb shanks after talk of it on the thread a few months ago - until I found out it's virtually impossible to buy lamb here.

swan I have to carry all of DS's things out of the door myself, otherwise he is bound to forget them.

PA Hope the pie turns out well. I am also trying not to be intimidated by everyone else's long lists (notice how I conveniently forget to update my list, as I am too embarrassed to admit how little I've done of the very few items that were on it).

good morning!
having a heck of a morning already (school run just over) as dh overslept by 45 mins. as he normally wakes everyone up, this didn't happen, so we were all snoozing away still in holiday mode until he peered at the alarm clock and started leaping around throwing stuff and shouting.

anyway, having packed everyone else off more or less on time, my list:

dw
wm
hair appointment
school council minutes
pathfinder planning
cub planning
downstairs bookshelf
make soup
3 hours study
early night!

the more observant of you will note i'm still ignoring missions.

but i'm late, and i need a shower (sorry flylady, but the 'dressed to shoes' thing got lost in the chaos that has been my morning thus far )

catch up later!

madwoman it is nice to have the morning vitality on the thread in the afternoon when I for one have partially given up..

Determined to finish tidying of awful bedrooms and removal of pine needles before they are tramped around house into every crevice, so dcs are now watching Ice Age III as emergency measure.
Made ds1 do his violin practice first though!

linzer dragging dcs away from Lego (rather than screens)sounds very admirable!

Excellent meeting with the head and then with DS's teacher. The head is going to tackle the boys who were being mean and hopefully put a stop to that, the teacher is going to find out what aspects of school life are causing DS most stress and then put strategies in place to minimise the stress. And I am going to take DS back to the dr for help with managing his anxiety issues.

Head feels the main issue is DS's lack of social confidence rather than academic issues.

I do feel reassured, as Arabella hoped, that the school are going to do their best to make school easier for my DS.

Am feeling exhausted now.

Arabella - when do you go back to work? Sorry, I have no good advice, but agree with the 'getting everything ready the night before' advice you have already received.

Waves to Swan, Madwoman, Linzer, PA, Nettie, Lair, OM and Dolanette (good news about the Miele!).

Tomorrow's babystep is to pick out your clothes the night before. I think this is a really useful step. I now lay out my clothes and both the DC's clothes too. DH rushes around frantically looking for socks and shirts every morning, whilst I look smug.

The last mission of the week is here.

Friday is meant to be the day for paperwork and miscellaneous stuff. Friday night is 'date night'. (Nice idea in theory - never happens in my house, sadly). More on weekly routines here.

Right now i have two words. Fuck. Panic.

These two words will sum up my evening.

Mad list for tomo:
washing
bake and ice birthday cake
pack for trip
pick up birthday present
finish project
photocopy all bits of paperwork that need photocopying
post office trip

PANIC ALOT, whilst running about like headless chicken.

About to turn computer off for the night.

Have Lovely evenings and good days tomo.

Thanks to all for the reassurance re going back to work/nursery beginning.Yes, I will have to get things ready the night before, and with that in mind have started the beginnings of a control journal

Toffee - I start back in 2 weeks, aaarrgghhh! Glad you had a constructive meeting at the school, that bodes well for your DS if all the adults are singing from the same hymn sheet.

Arabella - I know not everyone here feels the need for a control journal, but I do find mine incredibly useful and I'm sure it will help you with your routines.

I do feel encouraged by the meeting at school, though talking with my son about it later made me feel rather despondent again. He has such low self-esteem and is edgy and anxious all the time. He must get exhausted by it. I used to think a happy, stable home life was the secret of good self esteem, but it is so much more complicated than that, sadly.

Lair - good luck with your list tomorrow - don't panic! Hope you get to bed at a decent time tonight - you need to catch up on sleep.

Just a couple more computer chores, then off to bed for an early night myself.

evening all (puts herself in the stocks for failing in chit chat but have read all thread postings)

arabella my ds started at 9 months and my dd at 6. They bith loved it. Im sure you have got the best nursery in town and the staff will do everything to help your lo settle right in. I did ring halfway through day just to make sure ok and they both loved it and still do aged 4 and 2.
toffee so glad meeting went well, i hoe things really start to improve for your ds very soon.

well this afternoon decended into more sage chaos. Our sage expert thinks it due to our server but the IT bloke (my dh) wont have anything bad said against his beloved server.
anyway managed to redo all work from yesterday and some of the work from before christmas more fun on this front tomorrow morning
done full house hoover,clean and general tidy
dc clothes out for the next day. I dont know why but i never do my own,perhaps i should.
gym attended
dinner eaten and tracked in new iphone weight watchers app i love it and hope will continue to motivate me.

right must say adieu and go to bed. night night everyone

Gave up half way through the evening thinking it was all pointless as house was so untidy...

However had second wind whilst putting dd to bed, and managed to
tidy dcs' bedrooms
tidy kitchen instead of cooking grownup supper (dh had to fend for himself)
find dd's 2nd swimsuit for swimming lesson (she refused to wear the usual one because it "smelt of pee" - charming)
send off two cheques
text brother about birthday and had his baby arrived yet? [no, as no answer)
make tentative steps in playroom

All pine needles cleared
All decs down and in boxes upstairs
sink shiny
uniform washed and drying
plants watered
homework done and in bookbags

CLUNK...off to bed then...

first..toffee strategies sound v. positive. Ds1 had such low confidence in year 3/4 but it did come back, it was almost a developmental thing; I think he was behind his peers in understanding how to get on with other people, and that's what took time, causing all sorts of playground difficulties and attention seeking in class (not like your ds I'm sure - it was different). When he felt a bit calmer and surer and grew better at "reading" people, he just felt more confident, and able to cope with setbacks. It wasn't just intervention on our part, more patience in waiting for him to "grow up".

Arabella good luck.

Toffee I just remember the heartrending way ds1 used to say "I'm just useless at everything - no-one likes me" aged 8/9. As a parent I used to feel there was nothing I could do to cure this, no answer..But in fact he somehow turned it round himself. I don't think the difficulties ever fully go away but they seem less overwhelming now, to him, at least.

Swan - thank you, that is so encouraging to hear. My DS is quite immature and he does struggle socially, which i'm sure has made things difficult for him. It's so good to hear that things improved for your son as he matured. Maybe this is just a tricky patch and we just need to support DS and help boost his confidence enough to get through it. I'd like to think so.

Well done at your amazing Flying achievements this evening.

Have been ordering Tesco groceries online, then ordered a few new t-shirts from Esprit, so I'm going to bed late again. I just never seem to get that babystep right.

Good morning ladies.

Toffee, I am really pleased that the meeting went well with the school. I hope DS will benefit from some positive input from the school and it will turn around quickly. It can become a bit of a habit for children to have low self esteem, but it can be turned around quickly with the right input. Keep talking to DS and the school!

I think it was Arabella who asked about my jobs. Yes, I really do have 3 jobs, but they are all small and the sum of the hours is still not full time. 2 are ones where I am on payroll, the other I do as self employed and I also do other bits at home self employed, too. I love it, especially as with the 3 jobs in the same sort of field, I sometimes have to communicate with myself in my other position, IYSWIM. I write letters, "dear Mrs Positiveattitude, yours sincerely, Mrs positive attitude."
Its a good way to get the best negotiations all round and I never argue with myself!.

Yesterday went well and I nearly hugged my boss for keeping everything on track in my absence! (definitely not the hugging type, though, think comb-over, old and just not hug material!!!!)
Back to job number 2 today for the first time. Meeting the guy who had the job of sorting out my work. Hopefully it will be ok!

This week I have been soooooooo exhausted. I have felt sick I have been so exhausted and am asleep on the sofa as soon as I sit down after tea. I hope I get my Vaa vaaa vroooooom back soon! I feel mor pffft, pfffft, pf..f..f..f...f....f....t......!!!

Hence no list today. Just survival hoped for!

Morning all

Working from home today so hoping to get a bit more flying done as well. Back for a chat later, but I'm late so will just post a quick list for now

Shower and get dressed
Midwife
Dishwasher
Wahing machine *2
Put away washing
Room rescue kitchen
Room rescue living room
Hoover
Clutter clear hall
Rationalise toy cupboard
5 hrs paid work

If I manage all that it will be a miracle!

at PA - pfut- could do with an emoticon that says this (maybe a deflating balloon with corresponding sound effect??). Take care, you....

Toffee - I thought Swan's post was absolutely spot on. A happy and stable home life is crucial but unfortunately our DC are their own people with their own personalities which are different from ours... My own DS2 also felt very different in Y6 . He wasn't sporty, went through puberty early and generally thought other boys pathetic!! We nearly moved him his was so unhappy. I was teaching in a tiny primary (70 strong) where the emphasis is emphatically on the individual. In the end we left him where he was. He is now 14 and much more settled in his own skin. As PA says you have to keep talking and reminding him of hi strengths and do the 'feel sorry' thing regarding other children who bully. Try to keep home life light and fluffy too if you can - not too much agonising and angst. It's very tough on you and I know how hard it is to feel competent as a mum as the natural instinct is to fix everything. Big hugs to you...
nettie - WW app?? How fab! I'm trying to do new pro points thing as well. Lost 7 pounds before Xmas but think I've put it all on again!

Today:

Morning routine
Take DD to school done
Local shopping mall for a few bits without the rain!!
Pick DD up early (this I mustn't forget!)
washing
drying
ironing

Oh, what an exciting life I lead!!

at PA - pfut- could do with an emoticon that says this (maybe a deflating balloon with corresponding sound effect??). Take care, you....

Toffee - I thought Swan's post was absolutely spot on. A happy and stable home life is crucial but unfortunately our DC are their own people with their own personalities which are different from ours... My own DS2 also felt very different in Y6 . He wasn't sporty, went through puberty early and generally thought other boys pathetic!! We nearly moved him his was so unhappy. I was teaching in a tiny primary (70 strong) where the emphasis is emphatically on the individual. In the end we left him where he was. He is now 14 and much more settled in his own skin. As PA says you have to keep talking and reminding him of hi strengths and do the 'feel sorry' thing regarding other children who bully. Try to keep home life light and fluffy too if you can - not too much agonising and angst. It's very tough on you and I know how hard it is to feel competent as a mum as the natural instinct is to fix everything. Big hugs to you...
nettie - WW app?? How fab! I'm trying to do new pro points thing as well. Lost 7 pounds before Xmas but think I've put it all on again!

Today:

Morning routine
Take DD to school done
Local shopping mall for a few bits without the rain!!
Pick DD up early (this I mustn't forget!)
washing
drying
ironing

Oh, what an exciting life I lead!!