Wobbling on taking the HE plunge

[catbus]

Long one, so bear with me..
Hi all; am seriously considering taking my eldest dd out of school. She is nearly 11 and in last year of primary. Also I have a nearly 7 yr old dd2 and ds1 who is 2.
The school is great on many levels, but a lot of new assessments are in my opinion, a little late in the day. She has language processing disorder, and consequently finds it very hard to express herself and understand instructions etc. She is increasingly aware of this too and her tics have been getting worse.
She feels anxious every day she goes to school. I know that she will be lost at secondary, as she does not tick a box she is not statemented, therefore does not get continuous one to one support. I don't know whether to take her out from half term (couple of weeks away), or wait until end of year..She is mostly pro HE, and reassured that she could still see her 2 friends at w/ends and hols. I just want her to get her confidence back and start again, with no time constraints or pressure.
I am also not sure whether to take dd2 out. She is not that confident either and socially is limited really. I guess I would ideally like to remove both and get them doing things they enjoy at their own pace, building up confidence to meet new people.
I am wobbling about this really, not sure why! Possibly wondering if I can really do this with 4 (bun in oven) and if there really is enough going on in my area to support all the changes. Deep down I have butterflies as I am very excited and inspired at the prospect of getting my kids back and learning about life together!
So anyone with advice/tips etc, especially anyone in the Bath area, TALK TO ME PLEASE! Big thanks for reading..and apologies for this being so disjointed!

Bath???

Bath?????

You are home and dry, lady.

Here is the Bath and NE Somerset yahoo group

If they don't have enough on for you, it's just ten mins by train to Bristol which is a-buzzin' with regular events. Like, at least 3 or 4 a week. See their forum

Personally, I'd dereg them at half term - if it's the right thing to do, why wait?

Thanks Ommmmm!!
I am already a member of this group; have been lurking in silence for a while, just to see what's going on! Having been talking further with both dd's, they are adamamt that they no longer want to go to school. Am almost a bit wary of waiting the 2 weeks until half term, as I am sure that once the school know, they will pull out all the stops to convince my impressionable kids to stay. And no, this is not paranoia; they are a very reputably all encompassing image conscious school!
Are you near Bath yourself? OOOO I am so darn excited yet for some reason wracked with nerves!

Is there any reason to keep them in for the last two weeks?

If not, just take the dereg letter in tomorrow instead of your children

I can already feel the glee mixed with terror in your abdomen!!!

CAT me if you want to get in touch - I don't want to blazon my whereabouts all over Mumsnet

Hi Catbus - just wanted to re-assure you that HE is possible with several children. I have four under 7.5, and really envy the big gaps in between yours! And mine is by no means the biggest family I know... While it is hard work, it's definitelly worth it. If it feels right for your family, i'd go for it! And good luck with number 4's arrival

Thanks psychomumma! Am still wobbling; the kids want to 'practise' this weekend; trouble is I really don't know where to start! Do I really have to be ultra organised? Or can it really be more spontaneous? Am also crapping it about how it's going to be as I get bigger, let alone around the time of the birth. Some tips/what you do on an average day with 3 or more kids (one being a toddler!!) would be great!
ommmmward will def. CAT you when I have taken the plunge proper; that's if you're prepared for a million questions and a hormonal bag possibly floundering!

CAT away, before or after plunge

I'm not organised AT ALL. We have basic materials in the house (paint, coloured paper, pens, scissors, glue, food dye, corn flour, dressing up box, internet access, lots of story books) but I absolutely do not plan our days. So I can find myself reading with a child at almost midnight thinking "oh, I guess that's us doing literacy, then", or I can find myself at the zoo having a long involved conversation about whether or not baby snakes are called worms, and realise "Ah! A Biology moment!"

I do try, with each child, to have a concentrated half hour every day when we are completely on their agenda, whether that involves playing or cooking or talking or reading or writing or anything else, and sometimes we manage much more time than that, but concentrated 1-1 is sooooo efficient educationally that I reckon half an hour as a minimum is probably enough educational input per day (oh, and I am the parent who full time works. God knows what they all get up to when I am out of the house...)

If your children are wanting lots of things which are clearly "educational" (tis a bit like jumping off a cliff coming out of school after many years of people telling you that playing and learning are different things) then how about setting yourselves up so that at least twice or three times a week you have educational commitments or "field trips". i.e. Thursdays are biology, so you either go to the zoo or to oh-what's-that-water-bird-reservoir-called-that-flamingobingo-likes?, or, WEdnesdays are science, so maybe a trip to @Bristol, or you could join the national trust and do lots of history trips to houses and gardens and talk about how people lived in the past. And if your children want to draw or write things relating to it then yay, but if not, shrug.

In your wobblation, I would STRONGLY suggest getting yourself down to Felix Road Adventure Playground in Bristol next friday, 11am onwards (I know a woman who goes from Chippenham - it takes her about 30 mins in the car, otherwise, train to temple meads, train to Stapleton Road and it's ten mins walk if you have a good map . there are lots of children there the same age as your children - it might really reassure you.

OOOOO ommm; I would do Friday but will have 5 kids for a week (kids cousins). Bit hectic really..Is this a regular meet up? Will get this CAT thing sorted soon. Am still awaiting confimation of being approved for the Brizzle HE group.
Well, I am doing it tomorrow; handing in the dde reg letter and I guess that's it. At which point I anticipate whooping for joy then needing a stiff drink. Which I can't do due to being up le duff. Wish me luck ; feels a bit like learning to swim!!

congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, felix road meet up is every friday except holidays, so watch out for it not being on at half term.

I'm sure there are regular meetups in Bath too - I think it's a pretty active community.

Look forward to meeting you on the local boards!

Our days very a lot. If we're going out to a group, usually over the middle of the day, then the morning is pretty much taken up with getting myself and four children up, breakfasted (they all eat different things, of course - grr), dressed, teeth, hair, the endless hunt for matching shoes (we've long ago given up on matching socks ), etc, and finally out the door. This is the hardest part of the day for me - i do find it exhausting! But once we're at the group, the eldest two, and sometimes the 3 yo also, amuse themselves for the next couple of hours while I look after the baby whilst juggling cups of tea and packed lunches. Oh yes, making packed lunch also features in my morning madness. These groups usually have some sort of crafty activity set up for thse who wish to partake, and some toys for littlies - but they only really seem to need space to run around and play and shout. A lot.

Days when we're at home - I'll try and hear my 7yo read. I'll encourage her to do a Sudoku, or some of her logic puzzles (Lidl occasionally have some fab specimens of both). If I'm having a really good day, I might manage a formal (ish) maths lesson with the older two girls, while the 3yo (and maybe, miraculously, the baby also) is having his nap. They all love playing with money - my eldest is getting v good at totalling up a big pile of coins correctly.

Amongst all that there is also cooking, the washing, cleaning (not very much tho ), nappy changing, bottle-making etc. I do constantly feel that I have neither the time nor the energy to do EVERYTHING I would like to (like have a clean and tidy house, and definitely do maths and reading every day); however, I am always available to answer questions and just to spend lots of time talking, which I think is an invaluable and v effective learning tool. Teachers cannot afford the time to answer even ONE question every day from each child in their class. Not their fault, just a fact of classroom logistics.

Before you get too pregnant, I'd go out as much as possible, to ease the transition from being time-tabled by someone else, to being responsible for your own time (your DDs, I mean). Don't get panicked by long stretches of empty day in front of you; you all need to get used to a totally new way of life . And be patient with yourself before and after giving birth. I'd say it took me a good six months before I felt strong enough (sleep/energy-wise) to re-enter the hectic social whirl that is available to you if you HE. And remember that the phase where you have a baby and a toddler WILL NOT LAST FOREVER! It may be tough at times, but they grow up really quickly; the challenges change all the time . Sorry this is so long...

Thanking you kindly ladies!! Omm; will no doubt CAT you if not see you on local boards as you say..
Psycho;Thanks too; good to hear I can technically be as slovenly as ever..
Well, today was only day 2, and it took until about lunchtime to remember properly to just BE with my kids! We managed to play bingo, make pancakes and just chat really, in between them doing drawing or fighting and my son staving in the front of the speaker for the umpteenth time..
Little sod; happy days though!
Yes, will take it easy around birth time; at least this time I can, as before it was a mad rush with 3 to school 5 days after the birth. Really looking forward to it being chilled around then! Woo hoo!!!