Hi, Wiggly, not too stressed at the moment , although I am often seized by an urge to commit murder. I have 4 of them at home (17-almost 7) and 3 of them have special needs, 2 AS and one with dyspraxia/dyslexia/visual motor/organisational type issues that don't appear to have a collective name!!! It gets a bit much at times, to be honest, but that's another story.
It's good that your DS is only P5 at the mo., that gives you time to decide what to do and to see what happens. Although, in all honesty, secondary school is very difficult for Aspergers kids. My DS1 and his best friend, who are both now at uni, both have Aspergers and both went through the full 6 years of secondary. THey found it very easy academically, but personally and socially, it was a nightmare. it took years to get used to the constant changes, for example. Every year, they would just get the hang of moving classes and all the different teachers, when the summer would come round and everything would change again. And then there was all the special stuff for DS1, remembering when his music lessons were or his public speaking stuff, for instance. Also the horrendous treatment from the other kids because they weren't good at sports and didn't misbehave in class. That didn't stop until they were in the very senior years and all the neds had left. I don't want to scare you, but our experiences of secondary were not good, but then our secondary schools are not good.
As far as hassling you about registration forms, I would just tell them that you intend to try HE for a year, so don't need to fill them in. The school will probably make an issue of just not returning the forms at all, but if you tell them why,then there is nothing that they can do or say. I wouldn't worry about upsetting them or anything and they have absolutely no right to voice an opinion or harass you in any way over it. All I can tell you is that my LA tried to claim, for months, that because my DS2 had been for induction days that meant he had attended the school. Completely bogus of course, because he was still a pupil at the primary when he went for induction, but it made everything much more difficult than it should have been, compounded by the fact that we had filled in the registration forms. I was even getting letters several times a week from the schools head teacher and visits from the truancy officers, threats of court action, the lot. None of that would have happened if we hadn't filled in the forms or gone for induction.
Sadly, we actually intended for DS2 to go to Greenwood, but the LA refused to fund any sort of support package for him at all, despite his Aspergers. They wanted him to go for a year so that they could observe him and evaluate if he needed support! So, we couldn't safely send him. If I had to do it again, I would just not take any part in the transfer programme and stuff anything that the school or LA might think or say. I know that this can be quite daunting at first and nobody ever wants to upset the teachers, but really and honestly, there is nothing for them to be upset about.
Could you, maybe, contact Schoolhouse to discuss the whole thing, They should be able to give you pointers as to how to handle the whole forms/visits things and the particular situation with SN kids re. educational provision and the types of problems that you might encounter with your LA, who are bound to make things difficult.
Whereabouts are you, Wiggly, and I might be able to advise about how cooperative your LA is likelt to be, or not. Although, Schoolhouse are experts at dealing with out of control education departments.