Feel like it’s all going awry dc doesn’t like other dc

[Pricklypeary]

Have been home edding since January due to huge anxiety caused by school and several years of begging to be taken out. Dc is 10yo. I have tried at every opportunity to encourage dc to go to dc clubs or activities but they keep saying they don’t want to be near other dc. I sometimes sign them up for things they like and tell them to go for the sake of it but they make very little attempt to make friends. They will talk when spoken to but kind of awkwardly stand there otherwise.
another thing they do with sports clubs is be ultra competitive and get annoyed if they don’t win. They do often win most sports things which actually seems to exasperate this situation.

am I doing something wrong? I am not competitive and always say don’t worry it’s not about winning. I don’t even know if that’s wrong to say now. They now have fewer friends than when they were at school and not making any more. Education is going superbly however so at least that’s one thing.

[Saracen]

It's early days still. If your child was unhappy at school, they may need longer to recover and feel ready to be with other kids. There's no hurry, unless they say they are lonely and are actively asking to be with other kids? In which case it would be worth observing carefully to work out exactly what the obstacles are for them, so you can identify the environment in which they will have the best chance of finding friends.

If your DC isn't too bothered about friendships just now, you could give them some more time. Not everybody is equally sociable. And some kids prefer to spend time with adults, or with kids who are older or younger than they are. That is also fine and normal.

[Pricklypeary]

Thanks @Saracen they aren’t saying they’re lonely which is a relief. Good point about still not being over school. They definitely aren’t. Still asking if I’m going to force them to do weekly tests like at school etc which is such a shame. Happy they’re not at school now but always worrying I’m getting the social side of things wrong.