How do I go about sending a HE child back to school?

[sorkycake]

She has asked to go back

She says she loves being at home but she wants to go to school with other children. I always said I'd respect her wishes and will do so, but what if she changes her mind?

I'm not going to mess the school about?

Has anyone any experience of re-entering the school system?

Does anyone have any advice?

2nd question mark shouldn't be there, sorry.

What questions should I ask her to see if I can get to the bottom of this?

She says she wants to go back to the class with one girl in particular, but when we have arranged playdates, they don't play together because they are so different!

I think she is more in love with the idea of this best friend, but in actuality they didn't play together once past Nursery.

If wanting to get to the bottom of it:

is the attraction: playing with lots of children at once?

playing with or near a particular person?

being with other children but without you there?

being in an organised group?

having a best friend who she spends a lot of time with, or a small group of best friends?

because she might prefer to get whatever this need is met at school, but she might be able to have the best of both worlds through rainbows or brownies or playing at other people's houses or going on HE camp or... or... there might be other HE families in your area looking for this sort of intensive contact (there's one family we play/learn with at least once a week at the moment, because everyone involved really values the interaction, and it gives one parent a break for a while and yada yada)

2 of mine went bck at 13 and my 12 yo is palnning to try school after Easter
They want some structure and a break from their rather loud disabled sister.
Its doing my head in with guilt.

How are you going about it nmc?

She says she misses break-time. I admit there are lots of children around us who HE but none she has bonded with in a best friend way iyswim.

She understands she will not be able to pick and choose what she does, where she goes etc.

Has anyone had experience of staged re-entry into school?

Can you make "break time" in your daily life, maybe meeting up with some other like-minded families at the park several times a week?

I totally see her point - some children may well want and need unstructured play with little adult supervision and no obvious "point" to it, and a playdate is perhaps too formal.

Myself, I'd be exploring ways of getting the good aspects of the playground without losing what she values about not being in school.

They did a day visit to make sure and then just went at the start of term. Its a 6 mile bus trip away so I went on the bus a few times with ds1 but he now goes alone. ds2 can just go with his brother.
And I'll spend the day watching daytime TV and eating bob-bobs

thats bon bons

have you been to any home ed camps? Lots of unsupervised play.
Playdate question - isn't the aim to natter with the other mum and let the kids get on with it? I just used to go round friends houses and we'd ignore the children. dd2 has never been on a playdate as she doesn't get invited by the non-disabled at toddlers

HE camps scare the bejeesus outta me tbh, ever since fillyjonk told me the HESFES was full of pot smokin' parents and wild children!

I think we've got to the bottom of it eventually once Dh got in (she's Daddy's girl ).

Apparently she misses her 'best friend', I say best friend but really they didn't speak to one anther the last time they were together and haven't had regular contact since they were 2, she's nearly 6.

I think the problem is she needs an actual best friend rather than the fantasy version.

I'm going to contact a few HE'ers and ask if we can meet up much more frequently as they have girls the same age and see if anything develops from there.
Dh managed to gleen from her that she doesn't actually want to go back to school per se, just wants to have a best friend.

Phew!

yay! That's a solvable problem!

I dont know if this is the advice you wanted but if i were you id say she can go back to school in sept if thats what she wants and until then she has to stay H.E so she understands its not just chopping whenver she fancies it....my ds2 was homed educated for 3 years until sept when he started secondary school we just applied in the normal way and told the education people that he was going to school- it was quite easy really.
do u think she will still want to go back?

ahh sorry just read the next to last post ....oh im glad thats resolved x

noooo camps are fabulous! Its just that some aren't, really.

sorry I scared you re hesfes. we had a bad time there. I think its not great for young kids and straitlaced people like ourselves (the greyhounds in the tent at 6am WAS bad...). We are resigned to going when the dc are a bit older though...

Am glad that its been resolved though. We have been very lucky in that ds has a bunch of little cronies to run about with, I think without good friends, HEing might have been a lot harder.

you should come to the camp I've organised. Up to 20 families, near a beach. No groups of teens - just a few 13 yo's but mainly younger kids.
May 19th-whatever the date if the following friday. So 5 m=nights.

yes we should be having some camps down here also (though I know thats kind of far for you)

There are LOADS of camps, and most are great. And lots of people on here DO like HESFES, it just doens't work for us is all. (though the astronomy lectures were good, thinking on it). Nothing against HE camps at ALL, I've been to about 6 or 7 (plus smaller ones organised locally) and they are great.