My child is only one but!...

[UrethraFranklin90]

I'm already thinking about home education and wondered if anyone can offer advice/experiences?

My partner is worried about him missing out on the social aspects and the fun group projects at school. He has fond memories of primary school (but not secondary!)

My reasons really would just be that I'd love to spend the time with him, I think I'd manage ok with the educational aspect and I'm not convinced mainstream school is the best thing for children, especially from age 4-5.

I'd be looking to work part time in the evenings from home (currently studying for a postgraduate qualification that will allow this) so work wise it should be ok..

Would love to hear from others!

If that's your only reason that's pretty selfish tbh. You're a parent - your job is to do the best thing for your child, not you.

Keeping your kid at home just for you is selfish.
You are taking away so many opportunities for them. It's very clingy.
Kids need other kids. They need to experience interaction with other people. Learn about sharing with others. Having the chance to explore and be their own person.

Wow

You don’t know what his personality will be like. He may well be really sociable and need to hang out with other children. It just sounds like you’re possessive to be honest. I think on an ideal world most people would want their children to experience friendship and all the rest that comes with school.

I home school one of my dc (I started home schooling during secondary school, they went to primary) it is totally about them and their needs and nothing to do with my wants at all.

FFS, home ed children are not deprived of other kids or of social interaction unless the parents are remiss!

We home ed from the start, we were always open to the idea of them going to school at some point if they wanted to but they never did. They are now teens and still don't want to.

You do have to work harder to make sure they have lots of opportunities to do the things they want to do, you can't just dump them in school and hope they get it there, but it can also be incredibly rewarding.

It can also really pay off in the teen years, when they want to spend their non-work time with other children (or playing computer games), so if they're spending their work time at school you have a lot less of a chance to connect to them than if they are doing their work with you.

I was a bit reluctant in the beginning when dh proposed it, but I'm totally sold on it now.

You want to home Ed because YOU want to spend time with him. That's one of the worst reasons I've ever heard.

I was pretty certain would home educate mine right up until they started school! I just couldn't imagine them out at school all day, and in purely educational terms I could offer them more academic enrichment than they get in a class of 30.

I sent them to school aged 4 with the caveat that I could always pull them out if it wasn't working. 6 years later, they love school! Even though yes it is sometimes boring, they do sometimes fall out with their friends, very occasionally they've been in trouble when it "wasn't their fault". But still, they love it.

Depending on where you live, there will most likely be lots of opportunities to socialise and make friends with other home educated children across a wide range of ages, not just their immediate peers. Learning how to manage yourself and your relationships is the key thing, and that's not the same as learning how to exist in a school environment. There is a lot of crossover, but school is not the only way, and not the best way for everyone.

It's not an easy choice, and certainly not selfish - pretty hard work in fact! You might find more supportive conversation on one of the home educators groups on Facebook. They are a great source of advice, materials, meet-ups and reassurance. Obviously, there are people on there who are just as critical of schooling as the above posters are of home educating, so you need to keep yourself a little apart from the emotive arguments as it can all get a bit depressingly narrow minded.

Home Ed needs to be about the child's needs not yours.

This is so selfish. You say yourself your not sure you could actually teach him.

Besides. He's one. Give it a year or 3 before making a decisions.

(some of the above posters - cross-posted!)

Perhaps I've worded this wrong. It definitely wouldn't be just for me but I do think I'd enjoy home schooling. I also thought about flexi schooling and then seeing how he does and if he loves school then great.

So on this home ed board, what reasons do people deem acceptable to home educate? Children with SEN? Bullying? For a board about home education it seems poster's are against it. "Kids need other kids, taking away opportunities" and @titchy so you're saying school is the best thing for my child? If that's the case then great, no need to be so rude. I was asking for advice, never having done this before but vaguely knowing others whose children seem to be really happy.

So my understanding is;

• children need school
• home education is depriving them
• friendships are only formed at school
• I'm a clingy, possessive and selfish parent for even considering it

That's me told, eh.

I'll get him in nursery 8am - 8pm sharpish! Better get that socialisation in early!!

I've definitely written this in such a way that it seems focused on the spending time with him part, I honestly realise this is not a valid reason and it certainly is more of an added aside.

If I'm honest, I suppose my experience of school wasn't the best. I was academic but struggled with the environment. Secondary school was fine but I was bullied in primary school. I realise this is my own bias.

He may well be a really sociable boy who will do fantastic at school. Whatever he wants I just want him to be happy - I just wanted to know a bit more about home education in case he would benefit.

I have no teaching qualifications but I am educated and I don't think it would be an issue.

Flexi schooling seems like a good option, but would this make him an outsider at school?

This sounds like a good idea!

Although you've posted on the home ed board, a lot of posters will pick up the thread from the active conversations list, so will include a lot of people who don't have a clue about home ed.

Yay hyperbole. How very measured a response.

HE does indeed work very well for some kids in some families. There isn't a specific list of kids it works best for don't be silly. But the whole family needs to be on board - you say your dh isn't. And it needs to suit the child - and given yours is a baby you really can't yet tell whether it will or not.

My two are home-educated. Might put them in school for GCSEs (a few years off for the eldest, who would be starting secondary this year).
Mine have thrived. We are very sociable. But other people are not imposed on us five days a week, for seven or eight hours every day – we can have space and peace when we need it. Being with them for their formative years was one benefit. I didn't want them with another random adult for such long days, when we could be with each other – that's my idea of family. I don't see anything wrong with that. They are my children, and no one could love them more, nor want what's best for them. Primarily, I liked the idea of them learning for the love of learning, not just to tick boxes at school, and for them to find their own interests, and work to their strengths and interests.

True, but to be called selfish by people who have no idea about me when I was simply asking for some generalised information was uncalled for. My OP was worded wrong as I stated in a previous post. My main reason is being uncertain about mainstream schooling. I suppose I just wanted to illustrate that I also like spending time with my child, as all parents do.

Of course I can't make a decision for a one year old, just thinking about options and I thought I'd ask on the home ed board, only to be met with quite rude responses initially.

You've explained much more eloquently my thoughts around being with your children in their formative years, thank you. This is what I was trying to say really, should have given more thought to my post. It was quickly typed. Thank you for sharing

I see where you're coming from and I hate the idea of sending my child to school at times (one because I had bad experiences and two because I know some teachers are crap!)
I'm going to let my children decide if they want to go to school and see how they get on..
If it suits them, if they're thriving on they will go, if not I'll look for another school or home school them myself..
I don't know much about flexi schooling but if its half in half out then no, I don't think that's a good idea - they'll always be different and on the outside..
Also, you think to need about secondary as genuinely I wouldn't homeschool then - they might want to do practical subjects etc - unless it was a case they couldn't go to school for very serious reasons I'd be sending them to secondary so they could get the best prep for exams and choice of subjects..

Also, bear in mind that if you don't send him until he's 5/5 and a half he'll be in junior school and finished at 1:30/2 (in my country anyway) so will still be with you for a lot of the day until he's 7/7 and a half which are seen as the really formative years and the one best suited to play/outdoor learning xx

Hate the remark ..dump them in school. Parents make a decision that their child would be best educated in school with qualified teachers. They don't dump them to get rid of them. I am a primary teacher who fully supports parents to educate at home if that is their decision but l resent the attitude some home schoolers take to school as if its some evil place which they have been lucky to avoid. My dd has friends who were home schooled and she says she feels sorry for them as she has had so much fun in school as well as been stimulated to learn by the interaction with other students.
Respecting all areas of learning is the way to go.

Isn't it?

I'm just speechless. You are unbelievably selfish.
Parenting well is about considering what's best for your child, not you!

What a childish response 🙄

Who has suggested nursery 12 hours a day? I suggest you grow up a bit before you make anymore important decisions about your child's future.

Based on your original post and your responses, I'd say school is the best place for him.

Aren't you a lovely person.

Yes it was a childish response but I wasn't expecting such rudeness.

Thank you for kind comments, I hope you're not as judgemental as this in person.

I think that's enough Internet for me today..

But exactly, I wanted to know more about home schooling so I can figure out what's best for him!

If that's school then that's great.

My post wasn't "I want to be with my child forever 24/7 AIBU"