Apologies if this is a long post but I would really like some advice as I'm not sure what to do.
My DS is 10 he will be going into year 6 in September.
He has SEN and has been assessed when he was in the infant school. He does have learning disabilities and finds it hard to retain information low IQ etc He was doing well and progressing in the infant school, when he moved to juniors he struggled for a while and the school didn't really listen to any of his needs and what he needs in order to learn. Once we had a few meetings my son was getting the help he needed and at the end of year 4 he had made good progress, yes he was still behind but it looked promising that he was doing better and his teacher said that what we are doing is working so we will keep to what we are doing working together and using his ipp. However when he went into year 5 is when the problems started he was moved into a different class and it seemed like nothing was put in place to help him despite what it says on the ipp. I had to go in a few times as he had been struggling, losing things as he had a bad memory and with not being prompted or reminded about things he will forget. For example miss placing items or homework books etc and then he will get shouted at or punished. He's very sensitive and can get emotional at times which was listed in his report. A few teachers he's had for this year seem to not be able to deal with him due to his unable to pay attention and listen to instructions. Which then causes my son to worry. His behaviour is brilliant in school and he's always well mannered and polite and is forever helping everyone, he just finds learning really tough .He's also having issues with a few of his so called friends in his class, they have made his life at school hell this year and its making him ill, and affecting his learning. The teachers are reluctant to do anything as it seems like they think my DS just isn't trying but he is and everything that he has trouble with is listed in his report we got back from the educational psychologist.
When it's time to review his ipp each term I'm only in to sign it and back out again and this year there has been little to no improvement so something isn't working.
He was really stressed around December he'd been in this new class for around 3 months and he wasn't the boy I used to know , I had planned to see his teacher but we were at an event and I spoke to his headmistress and she noticed he hadn't been himself. We discussed what my DS had told me and everything seemed to be sorted out until the last few weeks of term. This week he'd been having trouble with one of the boys in school this boy is one of the more academic type and they used to be good friends but my son is very sociable and this boy wanted my son to play with him and only him , he wouldn't let him play with anyone else and he would just torment my DS and his friends at break time, which my son needs as he had trouble with concentration and he needed the break to relax but my DS was getting upset because the boy was hurting his friends and calling them names etc I spoke to the school and got them all together and it was sorted. Then it has started again this past two weeks because of what this boy and his friends were doing my son was to stressed to eat his dinner at lunch time so was bringing home a full packed lunch .My son was stressed out as this boy wouldn't leave him alone and kept hitting him so I made school aware and they said that they will have a word. I got a phone call saying they have had a word with them both and they are to both have space from each other which they both agreed and my DS thought it was sorted out.
I was then told in the phone call that at break time it was my son that had been following the boy round so he had been told off and missed some of his playtime and he was extremely upset but because the dinner ladies had seen him and reported back to the headmistress then it was the truth. I said ok I'll have a word with my DS when he comes out. He came out in bits, as he never gets punished like he did and he loves his breaktimes. I said what the headmistress has told me. When my son calmed down he told me that when he was in his maths lesson one of the other boys friends came over and said to him , that the boy had told her he hates my DS. My DS being who he is thought it was sorted but said he wanted to find out if he had said that about him or not. The dinner lady saw them talking and came over so the boy told the dinnerr my DS was saying all sorts. He said the dinner lady grabbed him by the arm to the place they go if they are to sit out of break time. They wouldn't listen to what he was saying and even told his friend who was trying to stick up for him to go away and that my son is telling lies.
My DS is one of the most honest people you can meet ,he doesn't lie as like I said his learning difficuties make him this way. Yes he shouldn't of spoke to the boy but my son wanted to know why he said it, so being the way he is and the way his mind works he wanted to find out why as he thought it had been sorted.
My DS said he feels like a failure and that he is an embarrassment to the school and has took badly what happened. He is mentally exhausted.
I myself don't think it will improve next year and I'm worried about his mental health.
If I take him out of school he will get full on one 2 one support and won't have the stress and distractions he has at school.
I'm just worried about the social side of things but I'm sure there will be clubs etc he could join and would enjoy for the social side of things as my son gets on well with everybody.
I also have a daughter but she hasn't got the issues my son has she is 7 and is ahead academically than my son and he is 4 years older than her. So school isn't helping him, yet out of school he is very intelligent, fast learner and bright but not in a school setting.
Phew that was long thank you for reading and sticking with me