Considering home ed

[madpulse29]

Ds is having a tough time in Reception.Along with being bullied by another boy the class teacher has been shouting at him for not spelling words right.

He’s been low and I am seriously considering taking him out of school to home Ed.I am worried about how it will work. Would we need tutors or can we join groups?

Sorry to see your little one is having such a tough time. Could you try a school move first?

Depending on your area there maybe lots of home Ed kids you can link up with but it would be down to you to do the actual teaching or hire in tutors.

I think you need to consider their education in the long term- would you be confident tackling GCSE level teaching in a wide range of subjects / can you afford to hire in a range of tutors in the future?

Your poor little guy! That sounds like a terrible atmosphere for him.

Few parents use tutors for young children, except perhaps for specialist subjects such as languages or musical instruments. The skills needed to home educate are very different from those needed for classroom teaching. Home education allows for plenty of individual attention and an approach which suits your son's individual needs. Both of those elements are hugely beneficial.

There may be some study groups you can join but with such a young child you will probably find that all you really need is access to good resources, a chance to play with other kids, and some interesting places to go. Not everyone does formal teaching; some kids like mine learn mainly through conversations and hands-on experience. It is well worth contacting your local home ed group to have some discussions with other parents to ask about their experiences of home education and find out what is available in the area. Where I live, there are loads of social and educational activities on, including science and robotics clubs, bushcraft, language groups and hands-on maths. In more rural areas that isn't always true, and you may have to travel for meet-ups.

The best way to find home ed groups is on Facebook. Go to the FB search bar and type "home education" followed by your town or county or nearest big town.

I totally disagree with the PP about the need to take a long-term view. Home educated kids can and do move in and out of school as their needs change and as the availability of suitable school education changes. A child who is better off being home educated now may prefer school when he's older. It isn't as if you have to sign up to an 11-year term of home education when you start!! You can see how your child gets on with home ed for the time being, and return him to school if and when that seems best. It's preposterous to suggest that the potential challenges of doing GCSEs from home should deter a parent from taking an unhappy four or five year old out of school. Decide what he needs right now and meet that need.

The future is something to consider though as yes he may want to return to formal education when older but what if he doesn't? Is that something you are prepared for?

Of course you want to help your child now and clearly removing them from the current school is definitely the right thing to do but I would need a long term plan of what I'd do in the different situations that could come up in the future. Not sure what is so preposterous about taking that into consideration 🤷‍♀️

Have you spoken to the teacher about it? If its a problem with just that one teacher and otherwise you are happy with the school I would ride the storm and see how he gets on next year with a different teacher. We are in a similar position with my 10 year old DS, he has had an awful relationship with a shouty teacher this year and has become very down about school. But the school on the whole is good and next year's teacher seems much nicer so I'm hoping things will improve. Good luck its awful sending them in when they're not happy.

Reception is so young to be unhappy at school. I don't think isolating him from life is the answer. Learning at school isn't just about English, maths and science, navigating relationships, having friends is also an education. I wouldn't do it, but I would talk to the school about your fears.

I have a nephew who isolated himself, he's really struggling as an adult. Help your DS through this, face the problem, don't run away from it.

Good luck op, it's horrible to see your kids struggling. 💐

www.enchantedlearning.com/ www.first-school.ws/ www.teacherspayteachers.com/

I really have no problems with the teaching of spelling but I have a problem with children being shouted at for making (very understandable) mistakes.

It seems strange to me to ask a group of children to write and spell correctly when they’ve not been taught to do this.The most they have done all year is write a few words down.Then to shout at one my ds because he gets it wrong.

Does the teacher offer a strategy for helping ds?No.’put it right you yourself’ The teacher says!

Thank you Saracen,Rage and Thisisnot.

I remember doing no spelling until juniors at school and playing for the first few years with no pressure.I have a postgraduate degree and so does Dh,if anything we enjoyed learning in those days because it wasn’t forced on us.A lot was self directed because we wanted to learn,I was never frightened to write.

"The future is something to consider though as yes he may want to return to formal education when older but what if he doesn't? Is that something you are prepared for?"

The possibility that a child might enjoy home education so much that he never wants to return to school seems an odd reason to leave him in an unhappy school situation. If the parent feels that the child would be better off returning to school later - or indeed if the parent isn't in a position to home educate indefinitely - then surely the parent does what all parents do whenever their children want something they shouldn't have or can't have: explain the situation to the child and send him to school. Returning to school may not be what the child wants, but surely he's still better off having had a year or two or three thriving out of school than if he'd been left in school to suffer.

but surely he's still better off having had a year or two or three thriving out of school than if he'd been left in school to suffer at no point have I said leave him at school to suffer (in fact the opposite) just that long term needs thinking about also.

As a PP said being isolated from life can become an issue I have had a number of pupils join at secondary school age for GCSE/ A level and they find it incredibly hard as they have been isolated through their home schooling and struggle to keep up socially a well as academically. (Obviously not all as there are great home educators out there but also lots who don't have a clue what they are doing and haven't linked into the fantastic support there is in my area for home schooling) This is why I would want to think about the future as well as how I could help my child now.

I used to teach Reception and it is a prime age for home/school misunderstandings as small children don’t always report events accurately and parents are often new to the school environment.

Please go and speak to the teacher. You might find that your relationship with her really improves.

The words the children were spelling should have been phonetically regular words that are achievable using the sounds he has learned. That is not unreasonable for the end of Reception. The ‘write it yourself’ might have been the teacher encouraging him to have a go, rather than fall back on being told the word. It all depends on the context...

I don’t defend the shouting, but there may be another explanation.

Are there any home school mums in Surrey?

Some kids are not suited to mainstream school. I home school my children, aged 8 and 11. It wasn't a decision taken lightly, and I appreciate the social benefits and team building side of conventional school. However, it is easy to find social groups for young children and there are home school network meetings you can find on facebook. It is easy to teach primary school subjects, and I think many parents can do this without the need for tutors. However, as they get older there may be a need for outside help. My kids do internet school, myonlineschooling, which means they get core subjects around the National Curriculum and then I top them up with extra lessons at home, and workshops in the community. They are happy and confident now, and not so tired. My daughter made no progress in her school, but now is doing well. Many people are negative about homeschooling, but we have found our dealing with the local authority to be good, and it works for our family. It is a big commitment though, as primary school children cannot learn much without supervision from an adult/ older sibling.

I agree with pp. I also use myonlineschooling for my 12 year old in year 8. I think primary level Id cope with, but year 7+....no. Thats why we use an online school, so Ive outsourced the teaching! Ds follows the english curriculum as he would in mainstream, just a different environment which he does much better in.

Im really pleased with online school, ds is much more confident and academically he seems better on it. Doesnt suit every child though. I don`t think education is a one size fits all.

LA here in Norfolk are fine with us too. No problems at all. I do wonder if some parents find the LA "difficult" because they dont work with the LA? Its the LAs responsibilty to make sure the children are educated properly/ apprproiate for age. Also safeguarding eg in some cultures marrying off young girls very young abroad, child exploitation etc. So as a home educator I see it as my responsibilty to ensure ds is educated properly and with evidence. I also dont shun the LA. Im happy to have them contact me or whatever. Some parents go all militant! sorry I went on there!