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Home ed

Find advice from other parents on our Homeschool forum. You may also find our round up of the best online learning resources useful.

Original poster

HHEELLPPP!!!

11 replies

singingmum · 07/05/2007 16:03

My son has come home upset after his group of friends took it into their little heads to lecture him about how he should go to school as he'd learn to swim play football and learn more and have more friends.
My son has always had a prob with kids his own age and for a few monts now we have been so happy that he finally had friends that didn't do all this.Imagine my shock and his upset when for some reason they did this.He is so upset and he walked away from them before becoming upset in front of them.
We don't really know any other HE families as there aren't really any locally.
How can I get him some HE friends and also how can I give him the info needed to talk to his friends and explain it to them properly?
I know he has to be the one to do this for his own sake but am really angry and upset at all this.He has been blinking back tears since coming home.
Please help and sorry for long post.

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Original poster
singingmum · 07/05/2007 16:40

Please!!!

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terramum · 07/05/2007 16:56

I think there are a few online groups for HE children themselves - maybe he can join one of these until you find some local ones he can socialise with & get tips for handling negative comments - just like the adult ones. EO has one I think - are you a member?

If an adult had said thise things to me then I would simply piont out that HE children learn just as much as school children & usually a lot more as they arent restricted by timetables, curriculums etc and local swimming pools and football clubs can be used instead of school....how old is your son? Is he aware of these issues?

Where abouts in the country are you? Are there any HE groups nearby that have meetings you could go to?

flamingtoaster · 07/05/2007 16:58

Sorry your son is so upset - I hope he feels better soon. It's surprising how well Home Educators are hidden! I couldn't decide from your post whether you didn't know of any locally or whether you had been told officially that there were none locally so some of this may be irrelevant! Whoever does your "official" visits will have a list of all the Home Educators in your area. They should also have details of any informal groups of Home Educators which meet. You could try that as a starting point - all they can do is pass your details on to others, they could not give you details of people to contact. If that doesn't work then do you have a local newspaper you could write a letter to asking local HEs to contact you? If you have been told officially there is absolutely no-one close to you what about asking that your e-mail is passed to Home Educators in the area with similar aged children - you could then get a group of them chatting on MSN just so he is in contact with other HE children.

dottyspots · 07/05/2007 19:41

Depends on the LA, I don't think ours would pass my details on ;)

I think knowing where singingmum is would be a start in seeing if there's anyone near to her.

Original poster
singingmum · 07/05/2007 21:03

Sorry had to run off.
I'm in St Athan in south wales and don't drive neither does my dp which has caused us a lot of probs however I do know that a group meets in swansea and one other side cardiff which is mega probs for us.
He is 12 and has dealt with this slightly before when a mother locally decided to inform all the people she knew and others that moved here all about the 'evil family who kept their kids prisoner and would not even let them go to school' she said this to one of my sils who realised it was us when she said where she lived etc.
This time however they ideentified that my ds has a prob with conversing about some things as he prefers to talk romans and history than anything else.In some ways we knew that this was coming just did not expect it to be this group of friends.
Thanks for the advice so far .
Dp learning to drive so hopefully will improve things.
FGS you'd think that we'd be prepared for everything after 10 yrs at this

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dottyspots · 07/05/2007 21:37

My ds is 12 (13 this year) and although we're nowhere near you (in Yorkshire) he'd be happy to write or e-mail if your son would like that. He likes history and also games like Risk, Warhammer, etc. - anything to do with battles and strategy.

Saturn74 · 08/05/2007 21:31

Same here, singingmum.
My DS1 is 11 and likes all those sorts of things, so he'd be happy to be in email contact with your son.
You're welcome to CAT me if you want to.

shimmy21 · 08/05/2007 21:46

Can I join in? Not a home educator myself so feel free to take not the blindest...

but I guess that this type of experience is one of the things that all home educated kids have to learn to deal with. Of course it's ds's friends who said this. Kids say what they think and don't always have a great deal of tact. They base their judgements of what others do on their own narrow experience of life.

You seem to be reacting to this by trying to find new better friends for your ds. There's nowt wrong with new friends (the more the better) but surely it would help ds more to help him understand why his friends may have said this and how to react to it. I'm really not quite sure why you're so shocked and upset. If your ds learns all the positive reasons that you have chosen HE for him he would have plenty of answers for his interfering mates.

dottyspots · 09/05/2007 09:14

"but I guess that this type of experience is one of the things that all home educated kids have to learn to deal with. Of course it's ds's friends who said this. Kids say what they think and don't always have a great deal of tact. They base their judgements of what others do on their own narrow experience of life."

My own eldest two didn't have a problem with it because they had originally been to school so were under no illusions. Generally any negative comments were put down to jealousy :D

Original poster
singingmum · 09/05/2007 16:32

Sorry haven't been able to get back on here till now.
Dottyspots & Humphreycushion my son would love that.Thanks for the offer.!Question however whats CAT and how do I do so?
Am idiot when it comes to this stuff am learning but...
Shimmy21 I am encouraging my son to talk to his friends and explain things to them but he is scared due to what happened with last lot of kids and their parents.Also the reason I am trying to find other HE families and Dc's is because he needs the contact with people who understand what he does in a day and has some of the same experiences and interests as well as introducing him to other interests.Some times we all need someone who understands

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Original poster
singingmum · 09/05/2007 16:33

Am def idiot have just seen the acronym list and seen what cat means sorry

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