Can a 16 years 10 months child be left at home to study without a parent?

[twomoreyears]

DS 'was' in year 12 (lower 6th form), age 16yrs 10 months, studying for A Levels but has had behavioural issues at school - mixed with the wrong peer group. Has now been discovered with illegal substance (weed), so head has excluded and made clear that permanent exclusion will follow.

As alternative to exclusion head has said will support a managed move - however after many phone calls it seems no schools want to take our DS part way through A Levels (that are now 'linear' so no two schools follow the same curriculum sequence).

I am thinking to pull DS out of school for home schooling (so avoid exclusion on his school record), however I can't be at home to supervise DS as I have to be at work - perhaps managing to work from home once per week.

Is this a problem at this age leaving a child to study themselves?

DS 'says' will put his mind to distance learning A-Level study (not cheap), so I am prepared to give it a go. He did cram hard for GCSE (3 A*, 5A, 2 B), plus 'says' wants to go to university (although has no idea what he wants to do).

Any advice or alternative suggestion welcome.

I think wrong peer group and an empty house alone would be problematic, can the local authority help with placement? Even if he is in a school library at least hes supervised.

Any chance you have a sympathetic boss who would let your ds use a desk at work?

He obviously 'could' be but it won't benefit him in the long term in the same way as having people around to help guide his learning and motivate him will. Even as a bright student who was keen to learn I would have been pushed at 16 as to where best to focus my efforts to achieve good grades without support.

Has a PRU been mentioned?

I wouldn't do it , just because your ds doesn't sound like he could motivate himself to study.
You would also lose child benefit and tax credits if you claim them, as home school needs to start below the age of 16.

What about sixth form college?

I wouldn't trust him home alone based on what you've said about him.

I wouldn't do this under the circumstances OP.
A well motivated independant learner could do this, but the weed would be too much of a temptation on his own all day.
I'm certainly pro H.ed, but know that this would be a recipe for disaster, how soon before the friends were round?

Could you stretch to some sort of supervision at home.
Just short term until he has earned your trust.
It would give the bad crowd time to move on as they'll soon find another willing member, they don't hang around if there's no benefit to them.
I know this is what I'd do, if it was me.
He made a mistake, did something stupid, the consequences, a baby sitter.

In principle it wouldn't necessarily be a problem for someone your son's age to study at home alone. However, it is a big ask for him to structure and motivate himself for all those hours a week. He doesn't sound very mature or focused. It doesn't strike me as a very good idea. However, you know him better than we do. What do you predict would happen?

There are various alternatives to consider. Have you spoken to local colleges? Maybe he can re-start A-levels. If you find a suitable course for him to start in the autumn then it's a matter of finding something productive and safe for him to do between now and then. Job maybe, or voluntary work?

If you feel he may well thrive on distance learning, what about him doing a part-time job alongside just one A-level to start with? The job would get him out of the house, keep him occupied and out of trouble, help to defray the costs of his education, and give him some useful experience. He'd have a chance to prove himself with the study, and meanwhile you'd be paying out less money for the distance learning until you are sure he can do it. That means he'll finish the A-levels at a slightly later age, but that really is no big deal in the long run. It might do him good to have a pause while he thinks about the consequences of the bad decisions he made at his current school. He'd still be heading in the direction he wants to go.

FE or sixth form College?

Not unless you move to the middle of nowhere.

Thanks for all responses. So quick, I have felt alone with this problem until now.

Timeforabiscuit, ApplesTheHare, MyDcAreMarvel, SomeonesRealName
I have contacted all 6th form study institutions (schools and colleges) in the local authority - nobody can take a new student on mid year, even next years intake application is closed. I am making 'late applications' just in case.

Aprilmightmemynewname
PRU does not cater for 16+ :-(

gillybeanz
Fortunately the 'friends' are quite distant rather than local (the school DS went to was a long commute). I agree about "supervision at home". In the short term (4 weeks?), as I have a very supportive employer I will try to work from home most days.

Saracen
"He doesn't sound very mature or focused" - that's an astute observation :-( I 'hope' he will surprise me, but I don't really know. I have contacted all the local colleges - no joy. I had thought anything to keep him occupied (like a job), but realistically how viable is that for a cocky 16 years old? If the study doesn't work out I'll switch to focus on starting study afresh next year - will just need to keep him occupied till then.

Thank you all for tyour thoughts.

I think starting anew next year is the best option, and get him into a job in the mean time.
Unfortunately, if he wasn't able to focus and keep his head down in an environment geared to learning and studying, I think home study will be even worse, and nay even put him off study completely.
Hopefully the experience of work in the next few months will give him the motivation to really knuckle down when he goes back. And sticking at a job might show the colleges or his old school that he is committed to taking his study seriously.

Starting again in September is a much better way forward. It also hammers home the fact that he has screwed up and wasted a year. Simply continuing the same but at at home doesn't reinforce that. Be aware funding a restart at college can be tricky funding-wise (it might be ok - it's years since I worked in this area) so consider a BTEC just in case.

An apprenticeship might also be an option.

"I had thought anything to keep him occupied (like a job), but realistically how viable is that for a cocky 16 years old?"

Where I live, employers are quite keen on under-18s, as they are allowed to pay them peanuts! So that might work in your son's favour. He is over compulsory school age, so the restrictions on his working hours aren't too inconvenient for an employer.

it doesnt sound like youve got much choice if hes being excluded and noone else will take him. I would try distance learning on a trial basis. He might surprise you. Plenty of people that do weed occasionally still manage to do the stuff they need to, and behavioural issues might well reduce without the pressure of school

Thanks for all the suggestions. We have found (not surprisingly) that DS is finding it hard to remain focused and keep from getting bored working at home study on his own (I've agreed a weekly lesson plan with him).

As a desperate measure we contacted a number of independent colleges (staggering £6k per term), but after initial hope were shocked when the college after speaking with the head of DS's school refused application :-(

DS is now thinking he may never get back into education ... me too! But assuming that we are both being negative at the moment, attention is switching to getting a job - any job.

Any tips on where to begin are appreciated!

You must have a Further Education college reasonably nearby? Or an apprenticeship.

Have you looked at BTEC courses instead at a college? I found the college environment to be very different to school 6th form, students were treated more like adults and it felt more like a step from secondary school to university.

There's also lots of great programmes for NEET students - might be worth looking into some of those while he has the opportunity before deciding whether to go on to further education.

sorry should say NEET young people - the point is they're not students!!

what sort of distance learning did you try?

I wonder if one of the online schools would work?

An apprenticeship sounds like a plan to me, look into that.

Starting again in September sounds like your best best. Jobs-wise, I’d start with the supermarkets, I think.