Am so jealous, I want to be a HEer!!!!!

[climbingrosie]

I often come and read the posts on the home ed area and wish I could home ed my ds who's 3 now but due to start school in sept.

The problem is I'm a single mum and I have to work, have set up my own business and don't want to go back on benefits, so it would be really hard to stay at home and home school...but I know it would be best for ds in the long run. Maybe in a few years I'll be in a better postiion to, so for the time being he will be starting reception in sept, I just hope it goes well.

He's in nursery at the moment and already from talking to his teachers they have no idea of his abilities, he is quiet and gets on with things indepenantly so I think he goes unnoticed a lot of the time by staff who are busy dealing with more challenging children, so I worry about how he will be in school and that he will blend into the background and not be challenged enough. I am qualified as a primary teacher with years experience so know what it's like and am disillusioned about mainstream schooling, and especially how it fails boys....

I don't want my son institutionalised by the system, I don't want his enthusiasm for life and learning quashed and brought in line with everyone elses...but I do want him to have a rich socail life, he loves nursery for all his friends and if I did he he might miss out, especially as an only child.

I would love it if school were more like nursery with emphasis on learning through play and nice short days, plenty of time for independant learning at home as well (or out at work with mummy in ds's case! )

Sorry everyone, I have just used this to ramble and air my thoughts, I have no partner to discuss these worries or thoughts with and just wanted to express my thoughts where others might understand and add their own concerns or worries, there must be other lurkers out there who wish they could HE!!

Also, I'll miss my son's companionship when he's at school all day!! It's great having him around now 'helping' me with my work.....

I work from home and HE our two children.
Perhaps you could give it a try and see how it goes?
Maybe take him out of nursery for a term and see if you can fit in your work around everything else.

I know single parents who HE and they manage with support from friends and family. Do you have family to help out?
The actual HE one to one I do is only about 2 hours a day.
The rest of the time the girls amuse themselves dancing, painting, playing, the computer and ClassTV. We go to HE groups, days out and visit our HE friends.
As a primary school teacher you're ten steps ahead of the rest of us to start! You could offer your skills to other HE families tutoring in return for looking after your little one while you need time to work.

Where there's a will there's a way!

Although I have a dh who helps out eves and weekends I still manage to juggle ebay sales, HE two dds and housework. It's hard work but the rewards of two happy, bright kids is definitely worth it.

I wish I had done it sooner!

Go along to your local HE group you will get loads of support, advice and reassurance!

climbingrosie, I know how you feel, I wanted to home-ed our dcs but dh wanted to try school first. Anyway, my dd1 is now in reception and she loves it, I couldn't provide the stimulation she gets there with my 2 yr old and my baby. However, it is a small school that values individuality, and parents are very involved. You can help to beat the system by what yu do at home, too - there is a great book called Guerilla Learning which you can find on Amazon. For example, I read books with my dd that she likes rather than her school book, unless that is what she asks to read.

I do miss her, but have come round to the fact that this is best for her.

What a nice post nearlythree! And thanks to everyone else too, really appreciate the advice!

I do have parents nearby but they work full time, so although they help out all the time with babysitting and weekends they aren't around in the day. Unfortunately my business involves a lot of hard work in an environment that wouldn't be safe for a child, so if he's always with me he'd be left alone in another room, although I cnan pop in and out.

I guess what I'm saying is the business involves a great deal of my effort and time and if I HE I'd either have to compromise the business or compromise my involvement with my son, but the business is only just keeping us afloat as it is in it's early stages.

At the moment the arrangements mean all business meetings and other things that I can't do with ds are done when he's at nursery (he's there four hrs) then all the other bits are done with him, either playing on his own while I do stuff or helping me with the things that he can do.

I probably spend 2 hours a day just focussed on doing something with him that he leads, following an interest he has so like other HEers would do, sometimes this requires a lot of involvement on my part, other times once he gets started he doesn't need me there anyway, but I'm available if he needs or wants.

I'm going to get in touch with other he families in my area as posters have suggested, and also visit the school again, it is very small with a mixed reception/YR1 class, so lots of emphasis on play. As nearlythree has poited out, my ds may love school and get lots more out of it than I could give at home, but I could still suplement his education with things he and I think are important.

I really have to go and do some work now, so sorry if I'm not around to reply to posts immediately! We have deliveries to make!

PS have been meaning to buy that book nearlythree!

I've also read a lot of other books like John Holt, Howard Gardener's unschooled mind and Neil postman's An End to Education. I like books!!

Could you also look into some alternative schools eg Steiner, and see if they might suit your ds better than mainstream school?

Good luck.

Hi Climbingrosie, you could take advantage of the SureStart scheme and employ a nanny or childminder in your home to look after/take to the park, your child while you work. You do have to pay some of the cost yourself but perhaps you balance this out against costs like school meals, uniforms. Just to let you know there may be other options
Denise