Terrified!

[ChildOfGallifrey]

Ok, so after de registering last Thursday I've since had a letter from EWO saying they will be monitoring DS attendance as it was very low (part illness part complete lack of sleep part anxiety...I was honest with school whether it was illness or sleep/anxiety related)

Obviously it was sent out before school let LA know (if they have) and they obviously can't monitor it now but I'm worried they will now think I'm HE to hide something or to avoid EWO.

CAMHS were also aware of sleeping issues as he's on medication. The reason I kept him off with lack of sleep (I'm talking 3 hours max when I kept him off school) was because the school had made no provision for his ADHD/ASD. He had no support except for the class TA and his class teacher and on 3 hours of sleep he was prone to anger, meltdowns and concentration was minimal. He was also exhausted and emotional.

I'm feeling that I've done something bad now.

I have CAHMS records plus the records of emails to Parents In Partnership who attended a meeting with me asking for help from the school.

The deputy head openly disliked me.

I'm driving myself crazy here and feel sick with worry.

You haven't done anything bad. Your son's poor attendance is part of the reason you are home educating. It is part of the proof that school wasn't working for him. If anything, that should demonstrate that HE is the right thing for him!! How could anyone think it would be better for him to be still registered at school but not actually receiving an adequate education there, because he often couldn't go in?

The deputy head is in your past. Monitoring of attendance is in your past. It doesn't matter anymore.

If you feel the need to respond to the EWO, you could fire off a quick note to say, "Thanks for your support in trying to help my son access education at school despite his absences. This help is no longer required, as I have now resolved the problem by home educating him."

You haven't done anything wrong. I wouldn't waste your energy thinking about it. Bare in mind that sometimes it takes be autocracy a while to catch up/they overreach so you might still get occasional contact. You can either ignore if not relevant or reply that your son is now being educated at home and you consider this matter closed. I hope your son starts to feel better. Well done for making a brave but good decision!

Thanks for the support. I've woke up feeling better this morning especially after reading your posts.

I keep wobbling but I'm assuming that's natural. This morning I feel excited. We are off to the local beach later as I want to show DS how our days could be.

I think having online support is going to be a god send.

Have you found your local HE community yet? Search for facebook groups with the right key word for your local town/city/county, and yahoo groups too. And we can help you get connected. And woohoo!!!! Yes, the suggested letters are perfect, I think!

If they point out the absences and the concern regarding sleeping, then you can calmly respond that one of the benefits of HE is that you can allow him more sleep in the morning and focus more time in the afternoon or evening on those days that he's had a rough night. HE will allow you to teach him during the times that he is most receptive to learning, rather than forcing him to try to learn when he is unable to take the information in due to circumstances caused by his disabilities.

I'm just starting out as well and having a wobble here and there, but I think that's fairly normal to be a bit nervous. It's a huge change.

The letter idea is perfect and will definitely pop one in the post on Monday.