What do you not miss about school?

[oneboy3girls]

Sunday night me ltdowns,looking for Pe socks,dealing with homework at10 pm,trying to deal with issues from afar . Home edders ,what do you not miss?

My dd was only in school for one term, five years ago! But still I remember:

Always needing a backup plan for getting her there. If the ropy old car won't start one morning, who can take dd to school and bring her home again? If little sister's hospital appointment overruns, who can take dd1 after school? If little sister is too ill to go out, how can dd1 get to school?

Watching the clock obsessively from 7:30-8:30am and from 1-2:30pm every day in case I lose track of time and am late to take her or collect her. Planning nothing during those hours in case it takes longer than expected, or the bus doesn't turn up, or some other disaster might make me late.

Not being in a position to say, "It doesn't matter if you can't find the right clothes, or if they are dirty. Just wear something else."

Staying home in the evening so dd could be well rested for the next day. Having a lie-in the next morning wasn't an option.

Bringing home a previously-chatty child who now wanted nothing more than to go to her room and be alone after spending the day crowded in with so many other people. Trying to explain to my 3yo, who'd been missing her all day, that big sis didn't want to play now.

Yes yes yes to Sunday night meltdowns! One of the reasons we are about to start HE is that I noticed they were starting to even happen on non-school nights too :(

I guess I don't really know what else I'll not miss as my DCs are still in school for a little longer but seeing them unhappy because of school issues is breaking my heart right now.

The ENDLESS evenings of trying to bring ds (ASD/ADHD) down from a rage, trying to find out what had happened during the day to set him off, trying to calm him enough to get him to eat, trying to think what to say to school staff next day about his being upset, and knowing that they would lie through their teeth to claim that there'd been no bullying, no incidents that they were aware of, and that surely ds must have been mistaken.

And ds having no friends. And me having only a couple but mostly pity. School uniforms and shoes. Paying stupid amounts of money in voluntary contributions. Feckin' Book Day and other inane dressy-uppy shite.

'Working in partnership' meaning dopey fuckwits who hadn't a clue about autism, expecting me to follow their expert advice, even when it was utterly crap and damaging.

All of it, really .

Being given a book to record how the day went by the school with space for ds to write and us to write and them to write. Then being told off by the school for recording all the bullying and detailing all the marks on ds body and recording how his hood was torn off (again) or his pencils snapped in half again. Apparently we were only supposed to record the good incidents in this book so ds could see how good his school life really was. WHAT? I really thought they were joking at this point as no amount of discovering your favourite food was available at lunch time could mask the horrible day he was having with 6 separate incidents of physical bullying per morning. I could see the road they were trying to travel down ie look on the bright side, but it seemed they also wanted to just sweep the negative stuff under the carpet.

Just one of many, many problems we are very glad to be shot of.

But actually no, I'm not really .

maggi - that's awful.

fuzzpig - you have a plan, though, don't you ?

With DS1 (ASD), I don't miss: walking on eggshells to ensure he was calm and rested enough to go to school; the stress and anxiety of trying to get him to school when he didn't want to go (had to physically drag him several times and actually permanently damaged my knee trying to push a buggy and pull him at the same time - every time it flares up, I'm reminded of that awful time); the negative comments from the less understanding members of staff; dealing with bullying; dealing with the teacher; watching my poor son wilt before my eyes because he was so unhappy.

With DS2, I don't miss worrying about how unhappy he was, getting up for the school run every morning and cajoling him to go, rushing round to get things done before the afternoon pick up, sorting out costumes and homework.

With both: worrying if either were sick in case we had a stern letter from school telling us off for them having too much time off (once received a letter telling me off because DS2 had had two weeks off with a viral infection that was complicated by a chest infection: the GP told me to keep him off for the second week ); and worrying about being sick myself because I still had to somehow get the boys to school regardless.

I still regularly go back to the school to pick up DS2's friends for playdates and one of the things that really shocks me is the noise level. It's awful. When I helped in the classroom, I used to wonder how the children could concentrate with all that noise, particularly if they had ASD or sensory processing issues.

Fucking hell maggi that's awful

Yep toffee I have a plan (despite not Flying at the moment!) :o