Panic?

[oneboy3girls]

Do you ever 'panic' about home educating your DC,and wonder whether you are doing the right thing?

I never wonder whether home ed is right for them. I see so many benefits on a daily basis.

But when I hear my friends talking about what they've done with their kids, I often do think that I could/should be home educating my children better than I am. People do such a lot of incredible things! There's always somebody on the horizon who seems to be doing it perfectly. More perfectly than I do, anyway.

I don't think I'd quite describe this as a state of panic, however. I know I am doing a halfway decent job because the kids are happy and well adjusted. It's just that I'm conscious that there's always room for improvement.

My view is that good parents always feel there is more they could or should be doing for their children - that goes for home or school educated. A lot depends on your own children and what they are open to - I know other HE families do things I'd love us to do but they just aren't on ds's radar, and just wouldn't' be interesting for him. I don't think anyone ever gets it 'right', because there are so many versions of 'right' and we aren't the same people. We just do what fits us and what's right for our families.

Yes, of course. Home-ed'ing and everything else!

I HE my 4yo and we don't do nearly a such sitting down as I expected. But then she gains so much from real life experiences and play that would be covered formally in the classroom.

Messing around with stickers or hama beads to discover patterns. Thank you letters, going shopping, playing cafes all help with reading and writing.

I think as long as you have a happy child, and there is some kind of progress then you're doing fine.

I had lots of secret worries in the early days and couldn't discuss them with others as it was my idea to HE and they were mildly against it. Had a few minor panics when laying in bed trying to sleep but I do that about anything new in life anyway.
I think it shows that you are looking at the negative aspects as well as the positive ones and are weighing up your decisions. I think that is a good thing?

My first week, both my DS and I were in floods of tears by the Friday. I doubted everything!
By the end of week 2 we were having a blast. I'm glad I persevered with it and sometimes wish I'd continued with it, but after 6 months he asked to go back to school - he was in his 1 st year of Primary when I withdrew him - He went back to a different school and loved it.

You can do this, I promise you'll love it in a few months time! I was told the longer they were in school the longer it takes to 'un school' them and they start thinking outside the school box.

I think when they are in school you cannot see what they are doing. Which might not be much....even if on paper they seems to covering large areas of the curriculum. It doesn't necessarily stay with them - the formal things I mean. What my children remember about school were all the out of the ordinary things they did - the dance competition the model river the choir. Which are all things you can give them at home. And more.
My theory is that you have to set yourself very small goals to start with, depending on what your main reasons for HE are.

I agree Swan. My initial goal was to get ds's mental health back on track, to have him stable and happy. That was the important thing - you can't achieve much without it.

Hi we've home ed since Oct mainly due to bullying and health issues school were not dealing with . We felt panic about if the ways we did things were right or wrong but we had our first visit from the end dept on Fri and it all went great felt so relaxed and also her saying no right or wrong ways . we are structured as we do plan for our son to go back to school eventually .

I met someone yesterday at a meetup who really was panicking because she had a visit from LA dept coming up and had only stopped school in Oct -her son was 12. I think it was a very clear example of how people expect far too much of themselves at the beginning. Until I talked to her I hadn't realised quite how much the deschooling thing might make sense. She was talking about how her son needed to do more "work" and she worried about him falling behind. And yet she had only left 7 years of formal schooling in Oct!!!! She felt anxious because he wasn't very keen on working.

I think getting that confidence in yourself and your ability to deal with your child is such a big part of the panic. It is almost like you have re-examine all your attitudes - what you think is "work" for a start and what the work is for and who it is for.

I really don't ask ds to write anything down that we learn because he hates writing (atm) But I try and note down that we "covered" such and such a topic even if just means making a pencil date notation in the margin of a book.

We have a diary we keep track in , take photos, of craft projects and have bought a few fun science projects which he really enjoys doing . D's likes things like that and is very proud of the things that happen heaven help ds1 when he comes from work as soon as he comes through the door is hit with full out look what we did etc . I do agree we felt so much pressure others who dont home ed on us we were very paranoid about things within 2 mins of our home ed officer coming through the door we were all very comftable with her she left 2 hrs later with dstalking still ringing in her ears .
We don't know any groups in our area to meet I know there are a good amount home ed in our area but as the librarian said she doesn't know where we could look which is a shame as even though we intend to put D's back in school it would be nice to meet others and D's could meet a diff group of friends .

Education Otherwise has a list of groups for each area. Have you checked on the web?

Our group is a Yahoo group with 400 people - I certainly don't know most of them but the group is a web group which flags up any meetups or workshops which might be of interest and then you slowly meet a few other home educators on a neutral turf without any need to invite them to your house or give them your phone no. (unless you want to!) Usually these yahoo groups or facebook groups are not open groups -you have to send a message showing you are a bonafide home educator to join.

HTH. Very impressed by recording with pictures.

Think me being anal helps i like to do things a certain way so photos keep me happy . thanks have looked on thatsite you mentioned we are in west Wales and fairly rural area .Did find group on there about 8 miles away may try that next week. Did meet a mum who I knew home schooled she had boys in school with D's a few years ago and she had pulled her two boys out a couple of years ago got her details but she also had no ideas of Meet ups.we live in the sticks

Our local Yahoo lists are dead now, virtually no traffic. Everyone seems to have moved over to FB groups instead. I think it probably does make it difficult for people to make initial contact as a lot of advisory sites like EO, EdYourself etc direct newbies to the Yahoo lists. They still exist and are managed by people locally, but there's rarely anything on them nowadays so it would look a bit like nothing happens around here, when in reality there's tons going on.

Contact that group which is 8 miles away and ask them. They may well know of people closer to you. It is possible there aren't any and that you might have to travel to find HE people.

Thanks will do next week possibly only way will find a group as we only want Ds home schooled until his medical situation resolves itself as he really did enjoy going to school .

fattymammy this year's Hesfes shouldn't be too far for you though