Is anyone working (for someone else) and still able to home-ed?

[Sincara8]

Hi all.

I have been thinking about home ed for my DS2 aged 8 for a while now. He is currently academically behind and I don't feel that the school is doing enough. He does have a slight speech and language delay and he did have therapy for this but this stopped last year because he had met their targets.

This is still causing a problem and he is not able to remember anything he is taught so it just seems pointless him being there. I spoke to the teacher yesterday and she basically said that they have to keep moving on to different subjects and they can't keep going over things.
His teacher did show me what was causing him problems in maths last week which brought him to tears because he couldn't remember how to do it. I tried to say it was confusing for him and there must be an easier way for him to understand, but I was told that was the way he had to do it.

Sorry, this is turning out to be a long question.
What I wanted to ask is if there are any single parents who are working that still manage to home ed. So far I have only seen post from people who have partners but how easy can it be done when there isn't a partner to help out and having to work as well.

I work 20 hours a week Monday - Friday and finish by 1:30pm. Luckily, I do work from home for a company.

Is it still possible to a least get him up to a basic standard of education?

Get yourself on the HE single parents (lone parents maybe?) yahoo group - someone will probably be along with a precise link for you soon :)

Poor you and your boy- it sounds like a struggle. I work similarly to you but a mixture of whole days and days off. My son is 12 so that does make a difference and I also have a partner so I get the moral and domestic support although we don't ever talk about home ed.

I think it can work for sure. But so much depends on your job and your personalities. I personally am finding it tough. My work is involved and though he does not distract me I feel distracted by him being here. I feel work, home and school have morphed and I'm struggling to do any well!

Are you worrying about how he is at school and spending time in the evenings trying to support him for the next school day? This was us for quite a while. And in that case what have you really got to lose?

I am sure you've already tried to get all the help he needs at school so I won't suggest that here. I don't want to tug at your heart strings but I do think children need to be happy and to feel good about themselves. That will serve them better in later life than knowing they could do their times tables by the end of year 6. Good luck

Sorry about that long post! You'd think I'd remember to say I he'd for year 4 and was working the same hours then. It was absolute bliss! So it can work and I need to look again at my situation again now. But what is it you are worried about- is it possible to break it down into specific concerns?

Thanks for the replies so far.

ommmward - I have sent a request for the single parents yahoo group. Thanks

stilllearnin - My work is not too involved at the moment but I do like to work without any distractions. I do find it difficult trying to support him and do his homework in the evenings after school with everything else going on and I think it is a little unfair on him too.
I did call the education authority today but no one even called me back. I am just getting so frustrated with it now. I was going to let him stay in school until the end of year 4 but now I am thinking about not sending him back after Easter and that is only because I have already paid for a school trip in March.
A couple of other worries are

1. Will I make the situation worse by taking him out and what if he doesn't learn anything with me.
2. DS2 loves being around people /friends will he feel isolated being with me all the time

Your reply wasn't that long for me it is really good to hear from someone who has been doing it for sometime now and I really appreciate it.

How is his reading (sorry if that is insensitive)? He could mix reading with playing with educational toys (which are pretty much everything!) whilst you are working, maybe with specific programmes on tv or the computer? There are maths gamesd on the BBC website, which he could do - if it was a game, perhaps he wouldn't get so disheartened.

Honestly, working part time would not be a problem. If you can read up a bit on "unschooling" - it sounds like your son would benefit from a period of unwinding from school and rebuilding his self confidence.

Socialising - there are usually a lot of groups open to all children, not just school attendees. Cubs/beavers, theatre groups (they don't have to be on stage, they need backstage helpers too), sports, and local HE groups. You should be able to find details of some of these on the internet - I've just been looking it up for DD!

Good luck. HE doesn't have to be permanent anyway.

Sorry I've been imposing non screen days- yes, it's got that bad! If you have worked while your son is off school you'll have some idea of how you could jog along together without school. As long as he is happily occupied he need not being doing anything educational while you work. The bliss of home ed is you can leave out whole chunks of school work and concentrate on what he needs and wants to do. It is a dream really.

You will worry you will fail him no matter what you do- sorry if that's a bit blunt. But what i mean is what do you really have to lose? You can always take him back to school in a year or so - he may be ready by then.

You have to work harder to make sure he gets to see friends but it is surprisingly easy. We've not found school friends have moved on and home ed groups for primary age is often very good socially. How does your son feel about leaving school? That will be a really good indication.

Hello OP.

Well I can certainly put your mind at rest about the socialisation aspect, I hope.

My dd is very sociable and I too worried about this at first.
She still attends all the groups she did whilst at school and any activities provided by the LEA and not the actual school themselves are open to H.ed dc, so including drama, music, sport etc.

Then she kept in touch with a few friends from school, especially her best friend that she had known from nursery.
She has also attended a dance school since 2.5 and she continues to see her friends here too.

Yes it is important, but really not difficult if you think you do these type of things when they are at school.

If you don't have an issue with the school itself, other than the education side then you can keep contact here too. My dd goes to see her school friends in their performances, fetes etc and is still a big part of the school wider community.

Her friends think she is cool and when she meets friend from school they are all glad to see her.

Finally, don't forget scouts, brownies, brigades, youth clubs etc. All brilliant for making friends.