Thank you for all the responses on my last post...I am now at peace with my gut feeling to just follow his lead and not try to pretend to understand how he learns but just trust that he does and will.
This leads to my next question...at the moment he has access to some specialist support which we pay for through me working...if I home school I simply can't afford these as options -to be honest I don't know if anything that he has specialist support for is helping him or not. (He currently has access to Occupational Therapy, Music Therapy and a social skills support group.) He has been with the triple s group for 4 years and to be honest I am not too concerned if this goes as it has made pretty much zero difference to him and he is very indifferent to going. He loves music therapy so would be gutted to see that go and OT...I just don't know with this one. One side of me says this may be his only chance of writing, of coping with sensory input, of gaining a multitude of physical skills that he doesn't currently have some of which he may wish to have and some of which he may not need (for example he may never want to ride a bike or scooter where as he may want to be able to keep his balance and maintain enough stamina to complete tasks and ultimately he may want to be able to write or not. I don't know how important it is to get his muscle memory and sensory integration tackled now or whether it will be just as effective down the line done as and when he desires to get intervention if that makes sense.