Letter from School Health Service - wwyd?

[noodle6]

I received a letter from the School Health Service. I'm not quite sure how to respond but clearly the LA had informed the Health Services (or the other way round?). Only my eldest DD is "known" so far - I withdrew her from school 2 years ago, and I now have another DD who turned 5 last Sept so I am guessing they are writing that because of my younger DD. This is so stupid because we have been using the GP services for any queries and health-related matters for the 2 years we have been home educating. We have had no need for any further meet-ups with health staff. Why would anything need to change now??

The letter, which is sent from a neighbouring Children's Centre which we never used, says :

"I am a Child Health Practitioner working within the Integrated Children's Team, working with children aged 0 - 19 years. I understand that your child/children is/are being homeschooled.

I would like to visit you and your child/ren at home on 09/07/12 at 14:00.

This will be an opportunity to discuss our service, offer any screenings and provide support with any health-related issues.

If this appointment is inconvenient I would be grateful if you could contact mee on the above telephone number so I can arrange a more suitable time.

Kind regards

Yours sincerely

XXXXXXX
Child Health Practitioner

(signed) XXXXXX - Assistant Practitioner"

How should I respond? I think I'd better respond in writing. I just need some ideas. Should I say "Thank you for your offer, but we have been using the GP's services for support in health-related issues and are very happy to continue as such. I do not see the need for any additional health-related services."?? Or is there a better way to put it?

Any suggestions or thoughts about this appreciated. TIA.

I'm sure if a case came up tomorrow where a HE child starved to death, immediately the finger would be pointed at SS, the LEA, the GP, everyone, asking "how did this go unnoticed? why was the child allowed to be kept at home with no checkups at all?" And yet when checks are put in place to ensure children aren't neglected, parents immediately say "Well I don't need it, I'm fine, why don't they leave us alone?"

"I don't read noodle as being irrational, or paranoid, or hostile, or anything else untoward".

Neither do I. Just cautious and unsurprising due to previous experiences

"My previous experiences with the shoddy service of the HCPs and the LAs and schools apparently should not affect the way I deal with them now."

CailinDana "Parents of children in school get a letter saying "The school nurse will be in on such and such a date..." and there is no option to switch."

But there is the option not to send the child in on that day which if if you miss it, you miss it. Same with vaccinations - if you miss the day they are done you may have to be proactive arranging for your child to have them.

plus you can opt out of health screenings at school - the Y6 weighing thing, also the hPV vaccine in Y8 were both optional.

Juule - equally noodle can say "that's not convenient, can we do instead?" If a child doesn't turn up for vaccinations or other health checks at school then that will be followed up in the same way.

Parents of preschool and schooled children DO increasingly get letters like the one the OP got for the reasons I mentioned above.

Like I said, I dont like them either and I wouldnt send one but they are not reserved for HErs.

I dont send them because they wind me up when I get them and they imply that the professional's time is more important than mine, that I have nothing else to do but be there when they call.

I do think the OP is over reacting to the letter but I can understand why she is.

So no problem then:)

Shouldn't be a big deal if Noodle turns down the home visit.

Exactly, MrsDevere.

Of course not, but noodle was questioning why the visits are there at all and was implying that they were unnecessary. I was making the point that they do actually have a purpose in terms of monitoring children who don't have monitoring through school. They can't force her to have a visit, I just don't see what her objection is to it. We were discussing the merits of the visit more than whether she can or can't refuse it.

OP is overthinking this. Child health practitioner (NOT a school nurse) will have access to majority of children via school (with normal parental consent etc). With HE children they don't have this opportunity, so will write to HE parents to visit at home. I wouldn't say there would be a huge problem in refusing - but a refusal will be noted and if there are other concerns then it might be taken further. If OP has good relations with her GP and the children are known to GP then there shouldn't be any further action.

"I don't think any parent on here is being casual about their child's welfare."

Then why are people being so negative towards noodle?

"when checks are put in place to ensure children aren't neglected"

Do you think that's the intention behind the letter that noodle got - a check to ensure she isn't neglecting her children?

You do use emotive language, but the example you use about a hypothetical HE child starving to death goes a little too far. There are very many ways to damage a child, and some of those ways happen in schools. Again: read some of the threads in the Primary and SN topics and see how badly some schools fail the children who are right under the noses of the schools and local authorities. Some HEdders take their children out of school to prevent further damage.

Op, just write to them and say you don't need any advice or services because you do everything through your GP. Then forget about it, and this thread, because some posters just have an issue with HE. Which is just going to lend weight to the idea that some professionals who come into contact with children have issues with HE, including possibly this person who may come to your house with their judgey pants on.

OP you do come across as paranoid and defensive, and fearful of Sch nurse seeing your children and your home. That's how you come across to me.

All of the Sch nurses I have worked with have been in that job because they care about and enjoy working with children, nothing sinister at all.

Cailin is absolutely right about the service being there to prevent children from falling through the net, it does happen.

Much earlier in the thread you said that the professionals do not have your interests in mind (or words to that effect, too many pages to read back!); they do, but the children's interests are paramount.

If you have nothing to hide, then you have nothing to fear

I really can't get my head round how many people seem to think that it is quite legitimate for someone official to come and check whether or not they think someone is abusing or neglecting their children. I can't understand why any parent wouldn't find that offensive...

Society going in a direction where any child not seen by a professional is deemed to be at risk in some way is something to fear, IMO.

I agree with huggly. And i think OP has been pretty measured given some of the statements on the thread.

"I really can't get my head round how many people seem to think that it is quite legitimate for someone official to come and check whether or not they think someone is abusing or neglecting their children. I can't understand why any parent wouldn't find that offensive..."

Every baby in the land gets a visit from a health visitor for that exact purpose.

I suppose that home educators get more attention because its an unusual lifestyle choice.

Loads of professionals have had contact with my DC, I've nothing to hide. Why would I find that offensive? DC has a safety net, all of our children do, and it saves lives.

maristella - this is the issue:

"If you have nothing to hide, then you have nothing to fear"

If you didn't want a particular professional to have contact with your child because in your opinion that wouldn't be helpful, then that's exactly what the response would be.

I dont understand why some people on these threads have an issue with every child in the land being checked out.Whether they are in a school,home ed,mixed race, white ,fat slim,hairy,shiny,etc etc etc etc etc

Suze, if professionals don't check up on children, how do you propose they do spot abuse? Or is it ok for an abusive parent to say "I'm offended by you wanting to check up on my children" so that they can carry on doing as they please? I have no problem with professionals checking on my child - they're there for his benefit and I have nothing to hide. I'm glad they exist and I'm glad we don't live in a society where abusers can hide under the guise of "well they're my children and I'm offended that you don't believe me when I say I treat them well." Why would you be offended by health professionals looking out for your children?

To add Suze, it's not automatically assumed that if a child isn't seen by a professional then they are being abused. However, if a parent refuses to allow their children to engage with normal health checks then that does raise concerns because it indicates the parent might have something to hide and might be preventing their child from accessing healthcare.

Children are voiceless and powerless. They are unable to speak up for themselves. If they are in an abusive family that is an incredibly scary and lonely place to be. Saying that parents can legitimately cut children off from the world and deny them the opportunity to meet people who are looking out for them and who could help them out of a difficult situation turns my stomach to be honest. If a parent can just remove a child from school and then never allow that child contact with any outside authorities what hope does an abused child have?

Because it's my job to look out for my children. Because I believe people should be presumed innocent unless there is reason to feel guilty. Because I don't believe professionals are gods - the idea that a child seen by a professional and a boxed ticked on a chart means the child is safe and well, while a child having no need of professional services means the child is neglected and abused is insane.

Is it contact with professionals that stops you from abusing and neglecting your children? Would you suddenly become a child abuser if there weren't any professionals checking up on you? If not why assume that those of us without professionals checking up on us must have something to hide?

The idea behind posts such as yours appears to be that it is only the something to fear that leads people to have nothing to hide. This is what I, and many others, find offensive (and warped).

So should we just assume that all parents are great and do their best and look out for their children and just leave them to it?

cailinDana Yes. Unless something draws attention and indicates otherwise.

"Is it contact with professionals that stops you from abusing and neglecting your children? Would you suddenly become a child abuser if there weren't any professionals checking up on you?"

Professionals do not visit families to prevent normal parents from becoming abusers. They visit families in order to identify those ones that are abusive. If you're not abusive, then nothing will happen. If you are abusive the child will be given help. Would you rather nothing was done and the abused children just carried on being abused?

What if the child is abused and nothing draws attention Juule?