Early days burnout?

[gentheyank]

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Im just wondering about everyone else. I went to the gp yesterday about some symptoms that had me a little bit concerned. I was starting to forget things. Sometimes little things like my phone number, sometimes big things like my kids names.... I was starting to feel all over the place emotionally in recent weeks. I had been having dizzy spells, suffering extreme exhaustion, inability to concentrate on tasks, mini depressive episodes, not real depression but felt a definate need to sit on the setee and see NO one and do absolutely nothing over half term. I became somewhat withdrawn. My appetite is all over the place. In my mind I dont think Im stressed out! Im happy! I love home schooling! I love being around my kids, Im looking at the long term here. About 3 weeks ago my dh had a minor operation (I called it that, a nurse yesterday, who was packing the wound, said 'Actually, this was a major operation... its not healing up properly, blah-blah-blah') that sent me over the edge.... Im in college two nights a week and one full day in a working salon. My girls just had their 13th bday party. It all combined to create the perfect storm.

Im just wondering if anyone else experienced that physical burnout early on, if it was something that you just adjusted to, found ways to cope. I guess this was simply a HUGE adjustment and that perhaps this was somewhat to be expected. I dont feel overwhelmed, in my mind, but my body is like 'Holy Crap, slow down woman!'

Thoughts... advice?

...it was the initial operation that sent me over the edge... I was already over the edge when she said its not healing up properly...(rolls eyes)

When my son was younger we'd make a list of all the things we wanted to do and then plan how far apart we needed to space things out because if for example we were out two days in a row we'd both get very frayed. And I'd have to be ruthless about striking things off the list if it was just going to get too much.

Nowadays the thing I have to watch out for is the fallout after I've taken my mum away for the weekend. My mum has dementia and one weekend in three I take her to see her partner and we stay in a hotel. I can cope fine with the weekend but only if I know when it is going to stop.

If the weekend is followed by a bank holiday where I have to take charge of my mum because of carer's holidays, my head explodes and in the week that follows I will have major arguments with my son, wake up at 4am in a state of existential angst, lose my bank card somewhere, or get my wallet stolen etc etc

I guess what I'm saying is...we old lags in home ed know we need to pace ourselves and keep mental and physical resources in reserve

Also, worrying is EXTREMELY debilitating. In the past when I've been worried about health or about money, I've been in a state of nervous exhaustion

You need to be ruthless over what you can cut back and where you can pressgang others into replacing some of your functions

You should get a second opinion, just to be on the safe side.

I think Fiona is right about the worrying, even though I don't HE yet I have been in your position when dh had an operation. I too thought it was minor and maybe the realisation of it being a major operation was enough to send you over the edge as it did me. His operation sounds so familiar with the packing and not healing properly. You do need to stop, as it sounds like your body is telling you this. I know you have responsibilities but I found being honest with our kids enabled them to help in their own sweet way, they were only v.young at the time. Let your dcs help you and ask for their support at this time, at their age they can cope with mum being a bit wobbly. If you still have nurses coming round your home will seem different to usual and also you maybe feel like your life has been put on stand by, I know I did. Give yourself time, you have had a lot going on and it will get better. Try not to expect too much of yourself until your dh is completely better and take any help offered.

Thanks guys. I cant stop but I can slow down and focus on the priorities. I have some blood tests to be done on thursday and a follow up in a few weeks. Been doing some research online... never really advisable but we do it dont we... All the symptoms sound stress related. Its helping me, as the home educator/student/mum/wife/carer/superwoman figure out what are priorities. My husband is at a stage in his healing where he can get himself to and from the dr surgery to have them pack his wound and things are coming together, sort of, in that department. Taking it one task at a time...

In my 20s and early 30s I derived huge satisfaction from cheating my body and cutting right back on sleep.

I thought this meant I was in "control."

I also thought I had to cram everything in before I had another nervous breakdown.

I didn't join up the dots about the cheating and the body keeping the score...

Homeschooling is about life, when life is bad you slow it down, we things are good you keep it up. We have homeschooled through a potentially serious disease (DC1) the birth of a sibling, bad birth and then babyhood, PND, the loss of my MIL and a suicide in the family, but we are still HE.

You have not to think about tomorrow, only what you are doing that day. You also have to be realistic that you can not cover all the subjects that they do in school.

And you must NEVER compare your child to a school child.