Autonomous and other things!

[catbus]

This is a bit of a multi questioned one really, so bear with me.
I posted back in the Summer about feeling like I was struggling with HE.

Not much has changed on that score but am now unsure as to whether I am putting too much pressure on myself and the kids: you know, still feeling like we should have worked out which direction/ how we HE properly by now (been doing this since Feb with 11, 7 and 2 yr old.)

My eldest in particular is really hard to get engaged in owt other than a couple of interests: still feels like she has a very limited interest pool/routine..

It has been a hectic time of late though and will be for a while: we are moving in a few weeks and 6 weeks ago DC4 arrived. Therefore, pretty much since the Summer, the kids have been left to their own devices. By this I mean mainly fighting/playing/gaming etc. My pregnancy was a difficult one in a few ways, and consequently the kids haven't had the best 'going out and about', more 'active' part of HE recently.

My questions regarding all this wobbling again are:

1: Due to recent events and one more imminent one, am I putting too much pressure on myself and them by feeling like we should be 'doing more', or am I really a lazy Mama?!

2: If you are/have autonomously educated, what is YOUR way of doing this: HOW autonomous?
Does anybody pretty much let their kids get on with what they want, even if that meant simply drawing/watching TV/gaming/reading, without stressing about not doing enough other things?

3: We are moving to a different area, but not that far away; do I have to let the new LA know we have arrived? (I am guessing not, since registration is just about still voluntary?!)

We are looking forward to the move as we will be in a small town, so walkable to lots of places; here it is quite isolated and remote.

Apologies for the long post, and probable dribbling on, but very tired and muddled and most definitely wobbly and hormonal! Could do with some advice yet again. Thanks.

Its very hard to HE and maintain the ups and downs of home life I quite often find that Im teaching ds in the morning then spending the afternoon chasing my tail - im so keen for him to learn new things daily I put pressure on me and him to achieve.

no help really but a similar outlook.

I think you need to give yourself a bit of a break. If you had a baby only 6 weeks ago, it takes time to get back into the swing of things! and I think many of us chop and change our methods of home ed. Some days we can be quite structured, but child led and feel like we have covered so much and some days can be spent in front of the tv all day and playing whilst its on!

It exhausting having a new baby anyway(I will be reminded of this in 8 weeks!) and moving house is stressful!

If your kids are all happy doing there own thing and you are there to support them when they ask you things,or help finding out info on the computer or through books you will be providing what they need at that time!

For moments when you are at a loss at what to do, we usually sit together and look on the internet for craft type activities which then lead on to looking at things in books etc, one thing leads to another!

My son who is 5 wanted to make star wars things today, so we did some sewing together making a yoda, found some colouring pictures, found a handwriting tracing sheet maker on the internet, where i printed off the words star wars for him to trace over, we then went for a nice walk in the sunshine and he wanted to collect leaves for rubbing with crayons, then he watched balamory and saw children painting plates, so we got out plates and painted them with washable paint, he wanted to make a parachute for his teddy bear so he could through it down the stairs.

Yesterday was a completely different day, he watched spongebob most of the day!

I hope your move goes really well!

We are very autonomous. We chat about anything which comes up. As I went up the stairs this evening carrying some cable for DS2, as his pack horse, I asked him to ask me any question.

He asked how much gold weighed. I said more than water and less than lead, mentioned 1 metric tonne of water = 1 cubic meter of water. So more than that per cubic meter!

Then we chatted about smilies, his favourite is :D

Now he's gaming and I'm on Mumsnet. I noted down the snippet of conversation on my HE log.

I would try and make sure the watching TV bit is educational rather than just drivel.

For example there are lots of series on BBC4 that you could record - eg history, Life (David Attenborough - running currently). If you keep an eye on that and record them and let them choose which of those they watch for an hour or two a day then they will be learning a lot. Another stimulating one is how do they do it - on Channel 5 I think. There really is a lot on the TV that can be very stimulating for HE I think.

Other things that they could be doing- how about cooking ? Let them plan a menu and do the shopping for it - work out budgets etc, may look at the nutritional value of it.

Reading - they could write or talk to you about the book - quick summary, discussion of the style, how the language is used to paint the picture etc.

There are lots of things they can be doing.

Congratulations on the new baby :)

Right, here are your instructions. RELAX! I reckon you should forget about trying to learn right now, in the academic sense. You've got the new baby and you must be stressed about moving. What about agreeing to just chill until, say, a month after the move? Give yourself a deadline and then when you reach it, you will have settled in to your new place and be more used to the new baby. Don't try to structure stuff right now.

The kids will be learning loads from life right now - nurturing with the baby, all the organisation (or otherwise) of moving, packing etc.

Other than that, just leave 'resources' lying around - workbooks, craft stuff etc. Let them get on with it - a few more months of chaos won't do any harm. Now go put your feet up with a cuppa :)

We are totally autonomous in our house when it comes to how we live from day to day; what we do etc. but within the confines of living in a large family.

We have only one 'rule' and that is that the tv doesn't go on until 5pm (DH gets home around 7ish) but can stay on after that point until DH gets home. That's because they all get fidgety and irritable when it's on all day, and we have only one main room, so it's not really possible for non-watchers to get on with something else while it's on!

We do do lots of things, but it's things I would do with them in school holidays - so we visit places; we bake; we meet up with friends; go to HE groups; play on the computer; write letters; play in the garden; play board games; do puzzles etc. etc. but I don't plan any of it in terms of fitting in with a grand, educational plan.

Thanks for the responses.

It's harder, I think, when you have a child that has spent 7 years at school, to not keep thinking they should be 'keeping up' with their school going peers..

I find it much easier with my 7 year old. I am trying to not feel pressured, so de schooling is taking longer for me than them! It's times like this I wish I had listened to my husband and HE'd from the start: there would be far less comparisons for me to make then.

I find it hard that I can only recognise 'learning' in whatever form, to be apparently happening only a couple of days a week.

Having said that, I take it on board about new baby, learning to adjust etc: in fact they did watch a fab programme last night on BBC3, where someone was trying to re create The Big Bang by way of mad experiments: they took a lot on from that alone, I think! Time for a chill pill methinks..

Am going to throw caution to the wind til after the move I reckon: and until am less sleep deprived and brain may return (in part.)

Anyone know whether or not it would be necessary to inform new LA of our existence/if it would be potentially beneficial?

Our three came out of school aged 13, 11 and 8.
It took a long time for them to recover from the damage done there.
We started off quite structured and worked out that all the problems of school, were being being replicated at home....but now it was their parents causing the problems.
We became totally autonomous..........no restrictions on screen times.
We did discuss everything and anything, including the TV programmes they watched.

We just lived life in a big family, I have three step children and two grandchildren and we all learned as we went along.
Given time and space to recover and the options of doing more interesting things as a family, individually and amongst our home ed friends locally and nationally, we couldn't have stopped our children learning.
The learning didn't take place in conventional ways, but learn they did.
They are all doing very well at FE college and Uni now.

You may not recognise all of the places learning is happening, but I'll bet they are learning loads every day in the very busy lives you have right now.

Can you find the time to read something like Grace Llewellyn's 'Teenage Lberation Handbook :How to quit school and get a real life and education'?
Written for teenagers I know, it's the book that opened my eyes to what and how autonomous home ed does work. And your eldest will be a teenager before you know it!

and I can think of no benefits of telling a LA that you have moved into their area (I always found more support information and support from HE folks nationally and locally)
and it most definately is NOT necessary!

Thanks julienoshoes: that book is one I have considered for a while; I may have to read it now!
As for the LA, you're probably right there too.

Big thanks for that