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Find advice from other parents on our Homeschool forum. You may also find our round up of the best online learning resources useful.

Do you get any time for yourself?

15 replies

Bodenbabe · 16/09/2010 11:34

If you HE, do you get any time for yourself? I am in the early stages of considering HE but, as selfish as this sounds, I'm really worried about having no time to myself whatsoever. Having the kids around you 24/7... don't you ge fed up with them? I feel awful even saying that Blush

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Tinuviel · 16/09/2010 11:47

Even though we are pretty structured and do 'table work' every day, I make sure I get some time to myself. Eg I am on mumsnet right now while DS1 is preparing Latin; DS2 is preparing history and DD is cutting and sticking part of her history pocket!

It was probably harder when they were smaller but DH is very good (he is home with them 1 day a week and we have a nanny for 1 day, as I work 2 days) so that gives me a break and Saturday afternoons I often go into town on my own or meet a friend, just to get away.

Marjoriew · 16/09/2010 11:49

It's not easy, is it, Bodenbabe?
I have 7 adult children and sometimes grandson will spend the day with my youngest son who is in computers and we sometimes go to Gloucester where my son and daughter-in-law are in the forces to get a bit of a break.
Having said that, they all have their own families, work, etc.
Others will have othe ideas here, but the way I see it, school would be much more stressful for both of us.
I don't think you are being selfish at all. Everyone has to take all the pros andcons into consideration and.
I just go to bed a bit later at night and get up a little bit earlier in the morning:)

Bodenbabe · 16/09/2010 15:57

Tinuviel, do you spend a lot of time preparing work? I can just imagine that I'd be spending all my spare time planning work and never have any free time to myself.

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Tinuviel · 16/09/2010 21:01

No, not at all! I have a think and look around at resources in July (before the holidays) and plan the next year at the end of August (1 table on 1 side of A4 for 3 children). I then sit down and work out how much they need to do per week and plan the first 10 weeks - that takes an evening. I then do that 3 more times in the year.

On top of that I spend a couple of hours once a week planning French and Spanish because we learn that with 2 other families so I have 8 to teach and like to be more organised for that! I wouldn't do that just for my three.

Obviously, I sometimes need to print stuff out - we bought quite a few resources as e-books, including some History Pockets, so that needs printing but I can usually do that while I'm on mumsnet working at the computer!

Some people follow their children's lead and probably don't really 'plan' much at all but we prefer to be more structured - it suits us better.

Bodenbabe · 17/09/2010 09:15

Thanks, Tinuviel. Actually, I think you have answered that question for me on another thread - many apologies if I've already asked you before!! I'm interested in your outllok as you are more structured and I think that's how I'd do it. How do you decide what to do - do you follow the National Curriculum? Also, do you plan each 'lesson'? I'm not sure if I'd need to (a) decide that DD needs to learn X so I give her resources about X and she goes off and learns it by herself or (b) I also learn about X and then teach it to her (or at least get enough knowledge myself so that I can discuss it with her). How does this work?
At DD's age (Y3) I think I could quite easily follow the NC if I chose to do that, without having to do a lot of reading up myself. But as she gets older, for things I don't have much knowledge about (eg. chemistry, physics, long division :o ) would I need to read it all up myself? (If so, that would take forever!)

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SDeuchars · 17/09/2010 13:06

Bodenbabe, that's exactly why most EHE parents don't describe themselves as teachers - they learn alongside their children. For example, if you decide to find out about Ancient Egypt, you may collect some resources but you wouldn't read all the books and then teach it to DD. You'd sit and read a book together and then decide to do some pottery (because the book mentions it), paint a picture of a pyramid (or make a model from card). Perhaps you'd find a recipe for Egyptian food on the 'net and instructions for Senet (www.ancientegypt.co.uk/life/activity/main.html) so you make the food and play the game. One of the Barbies gets mummified and your DD works through a computer game based in Egypt, etc., etc.

Bodenbabe · 17/09/2010 15:59

So you can't really leave them to research something by themselves, you really need to learn it alongside them? I'm just trying to work out how this would be possible with a 2 year old at home and was hoping DD would be bale to go off and do her own thing for at least some part of the day, so I can give the 2yo some attention...

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throckenholt · 17/09/2010 16:53

with a Y3 age child (I have 2 of those !) you can certainly leave them to entertain themselves for a few hours a day - it is good for them.

You can also build up a supply of videos that are learning (eg Coast, Victorian Farm, Richard Hammond's engineering) - park them in front of that for half an hour or so and you can do things with your littlie.

And then sometimes littlie and Y3 can play together and you can have some downtime.
Just go with the flow - sometimes it will work and sometimes it won't. And don't feel you have to be learning all the time - they need downtime to assimilate the new bits.

If she like reading then 1/2 an hour reading a book on her own, or painting or whatever is fine.

SDeuchars · 17/09/2010 17:56

No, I didn't mean that you needed to be there all the time. I thought you were asking about "how to teach". There is a load of stuff in what I said above that your DD would be able to do without you sitting on top of her. You can all be in the same room and it will just flow (as, presumably, it does at weekends now).

In EHE, there is no need to differentiate "subjects" based on age, so the 2yo can help with the baking and can listen to the books, etc. Both of them can do stuff at their own level on the same subject (IYSWIM - the 2yo will not be doing much of the same stuff).

Tinuviel · 17/09/2010 19:30

No, I don't plan 'lessons'. We look at books together for some things or I might ask them to research something and write about it. They are 12, 10 and 8 now, so it's a bit easier to do that.

For other stuff, as an example for textbook work, we use Galore Park for English. There's a fiction and non-fiction text in each chapter for DD. (10 chapters a year) Then various exercises, some writing suggestions, further reading. We will read the texts together and discuss the 'comprehension questions'. I don't make them write their answers. The grammar/spelling etc exercises, they do independently and occasionally orally with me. The writing is done independently, although we usually have a chat first to get some ideas going. The 'further reading' we have sometimes already read some of the books but we choose one that she would like to read and she does that alongside everything else. A chapter takes 4 weeks, so isn't too onerous even with an additional book that we use for a more structured writing task.

History varies: DS1 does his pretty much independently and I look over his folder every few months weeks.Wink DS2 reads independently but then discusses with me before doing written work on his own. DD is doing a history pocket at the moment and we talk about what she's finding out and I help out with cutting out (rather a lot of it!)

It really varies between the 3 of them and the subjects we do. A lot of the time they work through stuff and come to me when they don't understand or want to talk something through, which means that I finally understand Lowest Common Multiples and Highest Common Factors (which is more than I did at school!)

Art I do alongside them because I am really rubbish at drawing but getting better!

Sorry, that's a bit of a mammouth post!

Tinuviel · 17/09/2010 19:32

Just seen the bit about NC - we don't really follow it. We use quite a few American resources and quite a lot of Galore Park books (which are aimed at the selective prep school market). I have an NC Geography book that DS2 is currently using as a prequel to GP. And a few maths workbooks.

We do 'classical education' for history and grammar.

Bodenbabe · 17/09/2010 23:44

That's really useful, Tin - thanks!

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Saracen · 18/09/2010 14:25

"If you HE, do you get any time for yourself? I am in the early stages of considering HE but, as selfish as this sounds, I'm really worried about having no time to myself whatsoever. Having the kids around you 24/7... don't you ge fed up with them?"

It really depends on the kids and on you. My older daughter was intensely sociable and I am not, so I did find it wearing to have her around continuously. She wanted to talk to me ALL the time and wanted my full attention at all times. When she was 5/6 I worked part-time from home while sending her to HE childminders, which worked well for both of us. As she got older it was easier to farm her out allow her to socialise independently. There were long playdates at other people's houses, and when I had their kids round in return it was also easier for me as dd played with the children while I had some peace. She liked visiting the elderly neighbours and doing housework and running errands for them (but mostly just chatting!). She also started doing structured activities such as choir. Eventually she learned to let me have half an hour alone when I asked her to. So there are many ways to get a break, especially with an older child.

My younger child is very easy-going and I've never found it much more work to have her around than not have her around. And of course she can often plague bond and interact with her big sister instead of me.

I don't think you'll know how it will pan out until you've tried it. Many HE parents do enjoy having a break from their children sometimes, but most say that this need becomes less as time goes on

Bodenbabe · 18/09/2010 20:26

Your eldest does sound like mine, Saracen! The incessant chatting drives me barmy but I'm hopign that this may lessen if we do HE and she has more mummy time and doesn't have to cram everything in to a few hours a day :)

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MrsC2010 · 25/09/2010 20:25

What do you do about exams and stuff when they're older? It is a long way off but HE has always interested me but I don't know how it works in terms of qualifications, uni, jobs etc?

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