Does anybody else’s partner/dh/dw do this?

[Manchegocheeselover]

Please tell me I’m not on my own....please????

Dh won’t pay anybody to come in and, say, paint the walls for example.
He insists on doing it himself, even though I remind him he is getting older (50s).

Then gets tired half way through.

Then loses concentration because he gets tired, so makes a few errors.
Then gets fed up and stops just before the part where things come together .....arrgh.

We must have about a dozen jobs that need finishing in the house, about 80% finished.

But if I dare mention them.....all hell breaks loose.
I offer to help him. I use plenty of positive words,

Is it just me? Has anybody succeeded in encouraging them to GET THE BLOODY JOBS FINISHED !!!!

I understand your pain.
My dh likes to try do all himself. The job gets done but it's usually just about ok, waiting for the day we will get the whole house done at once.

What is the core issue? Is it finance or his desire to be house proud?

Perhaps you can find a middle ground and see if you can hire someone to help?

Good luck!

Just tell him to get someone in if he cant finish it himself. Pay for someone to do it yourself then what can he complain about?

You need to just give him a deadline, either it is done by you by X date or I am organising someone to come and do it.

Dh and I are very good at DIY, from decorating to fitting entire bathrooms and tiling. But we have our limit in terms of skill and time, so we do get trades people in.

I think there is no point trying to understand why your Dh does this, you need to work out how you deal with it. For me, it is a deadline or I get someone in, preferably local and hopefully a spouse/partner/sister/brother of someone I know. Helps them out too.

Would you just do it yourself?

Surely 50s isn't 'getting older' my dh is late 40s and he just gets on with stuff and yes sometimes stuff gets forgotten but we both muck in when stuff needs to be done and gets it done together. I wouldn't bother paying someone to do a job if we can get it done ourselves

This would drive me Barmy

I have jobs like that. I've learned to just bite the bullet and get someone else to do it, even if they don't do it quite as I would because then I can spend the time doing something else.

In my local hardware store there's a little card up with a guy that'll come and do whatever silly little things you need doing - tap washers, putting a toilet roll holder up, all the little bits that seem too much to get someone in to do - perhaps look out for someone like that and just get them to come round and get it done.

I can't get my Husband to get jobs started, let alone finished. To be fair to him; he's quick to suggest we pay for a suitable tradesperson to come do the work.
I tend to see something which needs doing and think 'I need to do XYZ' and crack on. Thankfully I am quite good at DIY, and take pride in a job well done.
I don't have enough spare time to devote to it as I ideally need to.
I'm not sure what's worse:- someone who can't be arsed in the first place, or someone who starts a job and abandons it, half way through. Probably the latter. You have my sympathy!