Does anyone ever feel shit about their house?

[perfectlyimperfect1]

When you see all these perfect, grey throughout, Mrs Hinch type homes on Instagram and various sites?
My home is just a 3 bed link detached, only living room, kitchen and conservatory downstairs with a main bathroom, small en suite and 3 bedrooms upstairs. I keep it as tidy as I can with a 2 year old but after moving above our budget we don’t have the spare cash to do much in terms of renovation. (I’ll add some photos)
When I see all these immaculate homes online it just makes me feel like my house is a dump!

Consider yourself instagrammed.
My point is, it's all smoke and mirrors. People don't have perfect lives. They can't do everything. If their house is spotless then there will be another area which is "failing". People prioritise different things and try to control what people see.

I mean this in the nicest way but you really need to feel grateful for what you have.
I work at a school were families of 4 are living in one bedroom rented flats or worse!
You have a very lovely, normal family home, you are one of the lucky ones.

In my case, you might walk past and see a beautifully tidy house. However, on those days it's a mess, I don't open my blinds so you'd never know.

We've been in our house 10 years and still haven't got it fully renovated.

Oh and one of the main reasons I got rid of all social media was the fact that it feeds these insecurities to dangerous levels.

Homes, bodies, children, relationships - we compare what we have to these exaggerated, enhanced, often disingenuous portrayals of others on Instagram etc. Hugely damaging and totally futile.

Also agree with @velocitygirl7 envy will stop you appreciating and enjoying what you do have.

My living room walls are green and we have purple wallpaper to one wall.
New sofa was £300 secondhand
Need a rug and cushions
Curtains were £15 FB purchase - just what I was looking for

It doesn’t have to cost a fortune

Omg i get this when i wstch amazing spaces or old house, new home. Mega house envy lol. Nothing wrong with ours but when i see all the new looks i think ours is a bit dull in comparison.

I get so depressed over my house. Been here over 20 years and still trying to get it how I want it. It's like the fourth bridge though. Finally finish then have to start again. I've recently done the living room. But still have crappy carpet due to dog. Had decorated the dining room, the boiler leaked came through the ceiling and the dog ate the carpet and wall so needs to be done again 😶
Kitchen , had new windows put in finally will have to decorate. Again. Trying to do our bedroom as well at the moment. My whole house is a building site and I can't see the end

I wouldn't live in Mrs Hinch's house if you paid me. Your home looks fine OP, and it would be so quick and easy to change the look - if it's bothering you at the moment then prioritise and save for a new sofa or whatever. You can transform a room with different furniture or a lick of paint. Even just some houseplants and artwork/prints would make it look better.

I hate grey and our whole flat is painted in it and as we rent I can't change it, but I still love how our home looks because I put years of time and effort sourcing furniture and accessories that make it cosy and homely. All our furniture for a large two bed flat/small house cost under £5k sourced from antique markets and eBay (and a bit of Ikea kallax for DDs room)

I was expecting your house to be terrible but it’s lovely.

@DDIJ why arnt you allowed anyone in your home sounds very sad

Yep I agree but I like your house. It looks welcoming and I get the feeling people who visit would be relaxed and comfortable.

I think coming home after work to the slow cooker on and a snuggly throw on the sofa is preferable to sitting up straight on a perfect sofa unable to touch anything incase you leave a fingerprint

There are 'show' houses and there are homes. Where would you rather be?

My house could also be a show home (like my neighbour's house is), but tbh I'd rather spend my time on living rather than tidying up every 5 minutes.

Your home looks lovely, OP. Mine is like the Forth Bridge - as soon as one room's decorated another one needs doing. I have not done any decorating for 3 years, though, as it seems impossible to get both time and budget to line up.

FWIW, my MIL cleans several large houses and one was featured in a Homes and Gardens type magazine. She was there when the photographer and stylists came, and she said it was hilarious as they kept removing and hiding all the personal/day to day stuff from each shot. So when the photograph of the immaculate (and superbly clean!) living room was produced, all the kids' toys were shoved in the hall and behind the sofa. The dining room had a complete facelift with all the owner's stuff put in the kitchen and a complete display set, including freshly arranged flowers, wheeled in and placed. Some wooden kids' toys were artfully placed in the "family room" while their own plastic toys were dumped in the hall.

So what you see is definitely not reality, and your house looks beautiful. If you feel the need to decorate just do it as and when you can and bit by bit you'll change it to a style you like more. Then you'll get sick of it or it'll need re-doing.

Coming home to a meal in the slower cooker and a blanket is heaven!

There is absolutely fuck all wrong with your house. It looks lovely to me, to the extent that I genuinely don't understand why you have posted

Given the genuinely dire state of a lot of housing in the U.K, let alone the shortage of affordable housing and the numbers of families living in temporary accommodation/hostels/B and Bs your post is ridiculous. "Just a" three bedroom two bathroom house, in really nice condition for a family with one child. Really?

I don't understand the mentality of this. A post saying look at my house "it's a dump"

It feels very much like fishing for compliments (and it's extremely insensitive to the many people living in genuinely poor conditions).

Your house is great. You're very lucky. You should realise this and appreciate it.

It’s hard but you have to take it with a pinch of salt. I used to work in fashion & similarly its smoke and mirrors. A dress clipped together at the back or a top that you can’t actually lift your arms in etc. As a pp said things are styled for mags & insta & often have impractical or uncomfortable furnishings. Most people I know have nice homes & the money for an interior designed house but their houses aren’t out of magazines. Partly because they don’t have time, aren’t that interested or the house is a work in progress, doing it up a bit at a time. Besides even if you designed it all amazingly tmw it would be out of fashion in 5 yrs.

Your house is enormous compared to just about everyone elses here in the south east. I'm moving cross country to get a bigger house.
I detest those horrible grey homes with nothing on show, they are vile.
Look like cut price hotels.
Wherever I live I make it colourful, have lovely throws, cushions and cosy curtains everywhere in rich colours and my collections of rocks, geodes and other stuff on every surface.
My home is the kind of place you can come in, throw yourself on a sofa and feel relaxed not a show home.
There are always one or two cats.
It doesn't matter where you live or the size of your house, it needs to be a real home.
Everyone said I needed to paint my house neutral throughout and get rid of all my candles and other stuff but it sold in two weeks as it was so I don't believe a show home is what people are looking for.

I totally get where you are coming from. We are planning a big renovation in 3 years when we remortgage (so likely 4-5 till we actually start!!) So my husband thinks doing anything is pointless. I however look at walls with stripped wallpaper, a 70s kitchen and nasty peach bathrooms.
So this year I started painting myself. Have used Annie Sloan in the kitchen on cupboards and painted tiles white. This morning with the kids help we've started painting their bathroom tiles. I'll get paint for their bathroom cabinets and change the cupboard handles - slowly but surely so whilst it isn't perfect, won't last forever it will at the very least be less embarrassing until we start the chaos of the extension.
My kitchen makeover cost around £100. I imagine the kids bathroom will be the same.
It doesn't have to cost lots, but it is hard work

@userxx I’m sorry, if it’s any consolation we don’t have room to have it pulled out to get for people round it all the time so we have to move it if there’s anyone round then push it back against the wall again!
@Standingonceremony wow I actually feel honoured to have my own Instagram assistant haha, thank you! It’s true though I never even thought of it that way, that a lot of it will just be for the photo. I don’t understand how anyone can be bothered!?
@BradPittAndABong I totally understand where you are coming from, and I know I come across as ungrateful when there are people who are homeless or living in dire conditions. I hand on heart didn’t post for compliments, I just think it’s easy to look online at all these posts and feel a bit inferior. I suppose that’s social media for you.
@ViciousTrollop I love the look of that room, it actually does look far more inviting than the grey look. It’s true, social media just makes you compare everything and feel paranoid and inferior!
@DDIJ I’m sorry to hear that. How come you aren’t allowed anyone in your home? That’s very sad to hear.
@madcatladyforever we live in yorkshire and our house was £187,000 which is very top end of our budget. If we moved closer to the coast to Bridlington we would get a lot more house for the money!

Thank you to everyone else with your lovely compliments about my house it has made me feel a hell of a lot better and think about how real these photos are on social media. I’ll try and find the photos in question that triggered me to write this post and tell me what you think! x

Yep, I've got complete kitchen envy with that photo 😞. I'd love a bigger kitchen, it's tricky to entertain with a bar table and two stools, but in reality have often would I entertain? Not often so the bar table is perfect for me and the boyfriend. I feel better already 👍

My friend moved into her mid-70s house about 25 years ago. Most of it is still 1970s, she has plans but not enough money yet. Consequently over the years our kids have been allowed to do all the things kids are discouraged from in houses (like there is a 'blackboard' wall for drawing on)

I don't hate my house but it's definitely not where I want to stay. More because of the area tbh. I know how you feel though OP. My house constantly looks like a dump/toy explosion. Your house looks a lot tidier than mine. We have a very energetic 2 year old and one on the way. I try unsuccessfully to keep it clean/tidy. I hate people coming round more because of the mess.
At the same time I'm grateful to be on the property ladder. I hope in the next 5-7 years we can look at moving to somewhere nicer. Also I hope by then DC will be able to tidy up after themselves abit more

Your house looks a bit like mine. I think people used to round to other people's houses more irl pre-internet, so we didn't have the same show-home expectations.

OP
Youll need to namechange if ever you post very personal stuff as your picture is posted on the first posting on this thread.

I think your house is a littke brown - personally I hate brown.
I dislike grey too- I live in Ireland and its often grey and cloudy outside so why bring the greyness indoors ?
Grey will go out of fashion soon.
Dulux Jasmine white is nice to brighten things up.
Even the dreaded magnolia.
FIL was horrified we painted so much of our wood cream but we prefer it.