We have just come back from a holiday with friends in France and my gloom and doom expectations were totally unfounded.
Dh and I went with our two sons, age five and eleven, so older than yours. However, we were staying with a teacher couple - one the head of an early years centre and the other was my oldest son's ex-deputy head. They are both highly experienced primary teachers, lovely people, but naturally I was dreading them casting a critical eye on our parenting methods.
As well as that, their house has a deep lake at the bottom of the garden - my sons can't swim well. And I had no means of escape, as I am not yet driving the camper van we took over. This meant I was at the mercy of dh who hates day trips.
We spent nearly every day for a week around the house and small village.
A recipe for disaster- but no. I arrived back feeling really relaxed and refreshed for the following reasons;
Our hosts not once passed any negative comment on how we disciplined or reacted to our children, even though I am sure my sons lively, and not always good behaviour must have got on their nerves. I thank them utterly for this. We were, hopefully, attuned to our hosts' desires, but their tolerance was beyond all expectation.
But the real key was, I think, the fact that we slowed our lives down totally - washing up was a great event. I replaced a drive out to a crowded attraction with an hour's walk around the village. There was time enough to linger over of every small detail of the day, not feel there was any deadline or need to go out and do things. I really leaned a lesson from it.
So if you want a tip, mine would be to aim for simple, nearby home things to do, to slow right down and not have any set plans or expectations for the holiday.