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Holidays

Use our Travel forum for recommendations on everything from day trips to the best family-friendly holiday destinations.

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Original poster

A weekend break without baby

10 replies

LadyHawkeye · 14/06/2010 20:41

A friend has suggested that we have a two night break in Italy over the weekend which I would love to do, leaving saturday morning coming back monday afternoon. It would mean leaving my 4 month old baby at home with my husband (Dad), who would be helped by his Mum (Grandma). My only concern is if the baby would be okay with me gone for 2 days. I have been struggling to cope with looking after the baby as I have no family here or friends that can help me out so I am alone most of the time and the baby is up all hours of the night so I am really suffering from lack of sleep. I think a short rest would make a world of difference to me but I wouldn't want to go if it would upset the baby. How do you think the baby would react and would he be very unhappy while I was away? Would there be a long-term effect on him? I'm the one that spends about 80-90% of the time with him under normal circumstances.

OP posts:

reddaisy · 14/06/2010 20:45

A break away sounds lovely for you and two nights wouldn't be the end of the world at all for your baby.

How does the baby get on with dad when you are not around at the moment? Does he put him to sleep etc without any problems? Could you get your dh more involved in the lead up to you going away so the transition is easier for you/the baby and your dh? Or do you mean you are thinking of going this weekend? And if you DH has got help then if the little one is getting fractious the grandma can always walk the baby around in the pram or something so your dh has a break.

The only thing I would say is that travelling abroad can be tiring in itself so you might come back more tired than when you went away but it would certainly be a break for you!

Go for it if you can.

reddaisy · 14/06/2010 20:46

And is the baby bottle or breastfed? If it is the latter will he take expressed milk from a bottle?

Original poster

LadyHawkeye · 14/06/2010 21:10

He's bottlefed so that's not a worry. Baby seems to be fine with DH as a normal rule but we do have an issue with him never wanting to go to sleep, he is no better than me at persuading him. I think DH would struggle to be more involved in the coming weeks due to the World Cup plus he generally has not let the baby's arrival curb any of his outside activities which is part of the reason I am stressed. He will be away overnight this weekend himself, it would be the weekend after I'm thinking about.

My friend is just as motivated to have a quiet relaxing weekend as me so I think it would be good, I also think that being alone with the baby might help DH appreciate how much attention the baby actually needs and that two sets of hands should really be on the job more of the time. I don't want to sacrifice the baby's wellbeing though.

OP posts:

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 14/06/2010 21:15

You won't. You are leaving the baby with his other parent plus a doting grandma. They will have a great time. You never know Grandma might be the one to sort the sleep problem....

Original poster

LadyHawkeye · 14/06/2010 21:26

There is a little part of me that wants DH to have a hard time of it but not the baby at all, I would be devastated if I got home and he had been miserable and was withdrawing from me. But frankly I don't know how much longer I can keep up the pace, I feel like the pressure is grinding me down and sometimes I just can't continue. I complain to the DH that I am not coping and need more help and rest and he makes sympathetic noises but it has not really changed anything he does, there are still things he 'has' to do. Sorry to rant, I really am just concerned about the baby but can't help letting my resentment creep in.

Baby is generally quite demanding and wants fed NOW and wants to go to sleep only when he has cried his eyes out because he does NOT want to go to bed. He is very much his mothers boy

OP posts:

angel1976 · 14/06/2010 21:41

Do it. Your baby will be fine. However, why don't you forget about going overseas and do something like a pamper weekend at one of those spa places like www.champneys.com/Champneys?

I have two DSs (one 2.4 and the other 7 months old) and I was on the brink of just losing it. Putting my DS2 in nursery 1 day a week (his brother already goes 3 days) saved my life though I still feel guilty about it. I did half a day at a really nice spa with my really good girlfriend last week and just loved it. It made me feel like a new woman. I think a weekend travelling and sightseeing is too stressful for this purpose IMHO.

Original poster

LadyHawkeye · 14/06/2010 21:47

My friend already has flights booked (someone else has cancelled on her so she has changed her destination). But she has promised me it will just be laying around, reading, strolling around the town walls and shopping. It's a little town in Tuscany called Lucca, she goes regularly herself (usually with hubby) and has seen it all.

I would love to do something like Champneys but I think I would be doing it on my own and I am not very good at justifying my indulgence to the DH anyway. I may have to start though.

OP posts:

kreecherlivesupstairs · 15/06/2010 10:31

GO GO GO GO GO. I am trying to see a reason why you shouldn't and failing miserable. GO.

Original poster

LadyHawkeye · 21/06/2010 23:06

Thanks for everyone's support but I decided it was too far and too long for a first trip, I'm going to have a one night spa trip instead, thanks for the suggestion angel1976!

OP posts:

sailorsgal · 23/06/2010 18:31

I agree LadyHawkeye, It would be too far. Before I had ds I thought I would book our honeymoon overseas. We got married when ds was 6 months. Thankfully we went to a lovely hotel not far away. I missed him dreadfully and couldn't wait to get back.

We only went for one night. I spent it expressing and throwing up as I drank too much champagne.

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