Been to SA twice with ds - once when he was 13 months and then last November, when he was 4.
First time we went to the Kruger - but he wouldn't remember it. It was Ocotber, so malaria risk wasn't high - but had had time, 'cos we went to the Cape first, to go to a chemist in SA and get what they recommended. Was given the Paludrine/chloroqhinine combination, but suspect that my choice was limited, as I was still b/f. We aslo made sure that he was always fully covered (easy with babygroes!) at dusk and dawn - and it was the one and only time we used the mosquito net for the travel cot.
Last year he absolutely loved going to the "jungle" and seeing the animals. We went to the Kruger again and he was a fantastic "spotter". Training him early!
If you've not been to a Game reserve before, I owuld recommend going to one of the more expensive ones, where a ranger takes you around as opposed to you driving yourslef.
This tme we took the expnsive modern anti-malarials (can't remember thier name) becaseu a) we were going in the SA summer, so peak risk and b) we were going to the Kruger the day after getting there, so wouldn't have time to start on a regime before we got there.
The Cape is absolutely fantastic. We love Stellenbosch. It feels very safe - like the leafy university town that it is. And every where is very friendly for kids.
In the Cape and from Jo'burg north (to Haenertsburg, where my granny/aunt lived/lives, or to the Kruger) we have always felt very safe driving. We also felt safe driving up the Garden Route from Cape Town to Durban and then on up to Swaziland and Sabi Sands Reserve. The only areas where we have had a concern was in the centre of Jo-burg (but more because of what every one says) and as dusk was falling as we were driving through the Transkei (we chicken out and didn't stay in the hotel in the centre of Umtata, but wen to the Holiday In Garden Court on the outskirts).
if you hire a Group B car, nothing facny (although air conditioning is essential) - preferably Japanese - then you wouldn't be at risk from the car hi-jacking that is relvent. And use sensible precautions, like don't leave anthing valuable sitting in plain view.
I would take your own car seat or buy one out there. We weren't impressed with the ones we got out there - plus you have all the worry about how do you fit it (as they won't show you). The other thing to do is to book the car over here, preferably through a "club" eg via a BA Exec card or with your travel agent. Two reasons: you get cheaper rates,
and if there are problems, when they try to charge you extra for "extra days" or "damage" or "petrol tank not full", then you can just pass it on to our "agent" to deal with.
There are some fantastic B and Bs - more like little hotels - that you can stay at. We stayed at a great one in Stellenbosch called Bonne Esperancce. Technically they don't take children under 8, but they were OK with ds (maybe 'cos we'd also stayed there for our honeymoon ).
There is something called the Portfolio collection - have a look here , which might give you ideas on places to stay plus some ideas for Game Reserves. It deosn't cover everywhere though - it's apparently got quite expensive to list in it so some places (like Bonne Esperance) have stopped lisitng in it - espcially if they were getting plenty of buisness elsewhere. But it gives you some ideas - and we never had a duff place once 9and that includes our "book as we went along" drive up from the Cape to Exeter Game Lodge (which also used to be in it) beside the Kruger.
The SOuth Africans love chldren. They also hate them crying - but instead of tut tutting, they try to help you. We had an infamous lunch at a wine estate in Stellenbosch, wehre ds was being fractious. He was taken away, held court on the bar with everyone giving him loads of attention and then disappeared while they took him on a wee walk (fortunately we are relaxed parents ). We had a lovely lunch in peace! On another occasion it actually worked against us, as ds was usually grizzly before dropping off for his nap, but the people at the function I was at kept on tryin to distract him and didn't understand when I itld them to leave him alone, and that that was what he alwys did before he dropped off.
Don't expect lots of high chairs though - they were very few and far between. Our "hand bag" high chair (the cloth one withat "tied" on to a chair) was put to good use - but sometimes it was difficult finding places that had chairs that were suitable for us to use it on.
The long haul flifgt itself is not an issue. Going over night means that it's easier to sleep, plus there is no jet lag.
I'd better stop now - I've wittered on long enough!